One Horse Puns

A list of puns related to "One Horse"

What do you call a depressed one-eyed horse?

A sighclops.

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👤︎ u/s0apyjam
📅︎ Dec 03 2020
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I heard they’re remaking one of the Lord of the Rings movies, but everyone rides around on bicycles instead of horses.

They’re calling it The Two Tires

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👤︎ u/LEGOM3426
📅︎ Nov 09 2020
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I see we're doing long ones - he's one of mine from a while ago... Presenting: Boris the Horse. /r/Jokes/comments/9c7h87/…
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👤︎ u/AlwaysMakingBadPuns
📅︎ Aug 05 2020
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I backed a horse last week at 10 to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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👤︎ u/Brucemoose1
📅︎ Oct 14 2020
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Believe it of not, the punchline is 22,112. "Wun-Wun" was one horse, "Tu-Tu" was one too. Wun-Wun won one race,

Tu-Tu won one too.

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👤︎ u/H_G_Bells
📅︎ Sep 12 2020
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One of my talents is finding it easy to fasten the strap that holds the saddle to a horse...

It's a cinch!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jul 27 2020
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One horse said to another:

Your pace is familiar but I don't remember the mane.

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👤︎ u/GobAteMyHamster
📅︎ Jan 23 2020
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*gestures at horses* Here are the stables. *gestures at other flickering and shaking horses. One horse explodes* And here are the unstables
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👤︎ u/Larkenox
📅︎ Sep 16 2019
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What does one horse says to another?

You'd think it would be Hay! but it's actually neigh.

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👤︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
📅︎ Jan 15 2020
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Did you know there is a new horse species with one eye and a horn?

It's called a unicornea.

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👤︎ u/WhalesWails
📅︎ Oct 14 2019
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What’s the name for a horse that is the smartest one in the barn?

A stable genius

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👤︎ u/PathWalker8
📅︎ Aug 17 2019
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If a unicorn is a horse with one horn...

a horse with zero horns is an acorn.

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👤︎ u/Tripoblast
📅︎ Feb 23 2019
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If a group of horses are all equally far away from one another, would they be equusdistant?

Making horse jokes with my flatmate and I'm particularly proud of this one.

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👤︎ u/MikeLovesRowing
📅︎ Jan 14 2019
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Did you hear the one about the horse that walked into a bar?

He needed an icepack after.

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👤︎ u/turdbogls
📅︎ Jan 21 2019
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The horse breeder always found it easier to sell brightly-coloured horses than pale ones

Two reds are better than dun

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👤︎ u/The_Possum
📅︎ Mar 23 2017
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Did you hear the one about the white supremacist who was great at taking care of their horses?

He was a Veteran Aryan

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👤︎ u/penny_eater
📅︎ Jun 13 2018
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Years ago, I was sent to a large stable to fetch the horse belonging to The Artist Formerly Known As Prince. I immediately knew which one it was...

It had a purple rein.

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👤︎ u/DinglebarryHandpump
📅︎ Mar 17 2018
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An unbridled masterpiece of a horse pun to one of my students this morning. It's a long setup, but dads will appreciate it. This one really happened as written.

So, I'm a Spanish professor, and I gave a final exam this morning. One of the last parts was that students had to write a paragraph using reflexive verbs in which they describe their daily routine. Since the class only had nine students in it, I told them that if they wanted to wait, I would grade their exams for them and tell them their class grade.

It was an open-book final exam (11 pages long), so I was in my office, and a graduating senior finished first and gave me her exam. When I got to her paragraph, I saw that she had written in Spanish that every day she woke up, got up, took a shower, got dressed, brushed her teeth, ate breakfast, and then she and her friend Emmy went horseback riding. Now, I knew that she didn't go horseback riding, ever, but that it was vocabulary from the previous chapter. The following conversation ensued:

Me: Horseback riding? Really?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every day?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every single day?
Her: Sí, Señor.
Me: I guess you could call it a stable routine then.

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👤︎ u/wuapinmon
📅︎ May 08 2018
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I bet twenty dollars that I could make a little horse joke, but I can't think of one.

I'm going to have to pony up.

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👤︎ u/TheLaziestofLids
📅︎ Nov 10 2016
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One of my favourite dad jokes to drop: What did Karl Marx call his horse?

Trotsky! :D

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👤︎ u/Facetious-One
📅︎ Jan 27 2015
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