More Examples Of Puns

So lets all make a skeleTON of puns while i play the tromBONE and send chills down their SPINE. Those where just examples as they were tibial puns, but it might have been enough to hit your funny bone. So lets all bone our punny puns and take a crack at making spooky jokes. Remember to make more spooky puns today or you will be the one with no backbone.

More specifically, my friend and I are going to every ice cream place we possibly can this summer and want to think of a name for our little adventure. "Tour de cone" is a dumb example we came up with. Anyone have other suggestions!? Thanks!

I have a few examples of what I'm looking for. I like them, but I'm sure the power of Reddit can come up with some that are even better!

• William (Bill) Ding

• James (Jim) Nastics

• Bart Ender

• Ted Manwalkin

• Gustavo (Gus) Undheit

As you can see, they don't even have to be straight up puns when said normally, but their common nicknames lend themselves into it. Anyone have any more good ones? Bad ones are appreciated too, lets all have a laugh!

Hi guys, I need to change my username online (mostly used in games) as it's not really something unique ( came from a book I read when I was younger ).

I'm trying to find something quite funny, with plays on words for example. But english isn't my native language and I find it quite hard ! So I'm asking you guys to help me :) You're the best for that imho !

If you could help me find something mixing music (percussions/drums), sciences (my field of study, physics to be more precise), beer and animals maybe (?) (because I like that !)

I think this is possible to find something using some science-specific noun and something else. But I can't seem to find one that suits me :(

I have written this book to sweep away all misunderstandings about the crafty art of punnery and to convince you that the pun is well worth celebrating.... After all, the pun is mightier than the sword, and these days you are much more likely to run into a pun than into a sword. [A pun is a witticism involving the playful use of a word in different senses, or of words which differ in meaning but sound alike.]

Scoffing at puns seems to be a conditioned reflex, and through the centuries a steady barrage of libel and slander has been aimed at the practice of punning. Nearly three hundred years ago John Dennis sneered, “A pun is the lowest form of wit,” a charge that has been butted and rebutted by a mighty line of pundits and punheads.

Henry Erskine, for example, has protested that if a pun is the lowest form of wit, “It is, therefore, the foundation of all wit.” Oscar Levant has added a tag line: “A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don’t think of it first.” John Crosbie and Bob Davies have responded to Dennis with hot, cross puns: “...If someone complains that punning is the lowest form of humor you can tell them that poetry is verse.”

Samuel Johnson, the eighteenth century self-appointed custodian of the English language, once thundered, “To trifle with the vocabulary which is the vehicle of social intercourse is to tamper with the currency of human intelligence. He who would violate the sanctities of his mother tongue would invade the recesses of the national till without remorse... ”

Joseph Addison pronounced that the seeds of punning are in the minds of all men, and tho’ they may be subdued by reason, reflection, and good sense, they will be very apt to shoot up in the greatest genius, that which is not broken and cultivated by the rules of art.

Far from being invertebrate, the inveterate punster is a brave entertainer. He or she loves to create a three-ring circus of words: words clowning, words teetering on tightropes, words swinging from tent tops, words thrusting their head into the mouths of lions. Punnery can be highly entertaining, but it is always a risky business. The humor can fall on its face, it can lose its balance and plunge into the sawdust, or it can be decapitated by the snapping shut of jaws. While circus performers often receive laughter or applause for their efforts, punsters often draw an obligatory groan for theirs. But the fact that most people groan at, rather than laugh at, puns doesn’t mean that the punnery isn’t fu

My college roommate's dad had a brilliant way of taking well-known jokes and butchering the punchlines. Could be fun when your kids are slightly older. A couple memorable examples:

• A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel sticking out of his pants. The bartender pours him a beer, and remarks that the wheel looks uncomfortable. The pirate replies, "Yar! It's steering me balls."
• Two cannibals are having dinner. The first one says "my mother-in-law tastes awful." The other replies "then have some more potatoes."
• How do you make a salad wrap? Just add drums!

Google Allo comes with what they are calling Google Assistant. You can ask it to tell you jokes and so far they are all like dad jokes. What's more you can have it schedule a daily delivery at a certain time.

For example here are some:

> Why did the coffee taste like mud? >> Because it was ground just a couple of minutes ago ☕️

> How do you get over a fear of elevators? >> Just take some steps to avoid them!

On October 23 (6.02x10^23) in my chem class we celebrate mole day. You have to make a project revolving around a mole pun. This year I did MoleDemort and printed a life size Voldemort with a mole head, but I'm out of ideas for Chem 2 AP next year. Want to get ideas early on, any suggestions? Some examples already taken that I don't want to repeat: Darth Mole Moleverine

I will add more as I remember, or if you come up with one that's already done.

Thanks in advance.