Monmouth Browns Puns

This is mid season. Based off NCAA.com Net rankings

SCHOOL NAME, MASCOT, ABBREVIATION, CONFERENCE, PRIMARY HEX COLOR, SECONDARY HEX COLOR, PRESTIGE, HOME STATE, PIPELINE STATES (separated by .); Connecticut, Huskies, UCONN, Northeast, 000E2F, E4002B, 83, CT, CT.MA.RI; Villanova, Wildcats, NOVA, Northeast, 00205B, 13B5EA, 90, PA, PA.NY.NJ.DE.MD.DC; Rhode Island, Rams, URI, Northeast, 68ABE8, FFFFFF, 70, RI, RI.MA.ME; Providence, Friars, PROV, Northeast, 000000, 8A8D8F, 75, RI, RI.MA.ME; Seton Hall, Pirates, SHU, Northeast, 004488, A2AAAD, 76, NJ, NJ.NY; Hofstra, Pride, HOFS, Northeast, 003591, FDC82F, 37, NY, NY.NJ.PA; Georgetown, Hoyas, GU, Northeast, 041E42, 8D817B, 65, DC, DC.MD; St. John’s, Red Storm, STJ, Northeast, BA0C2F, A7A8AA, 70, NY, NY.NJ; Vermont, Catamounts, VERM, Northeast, 154734, FFC72C, 54, VT, VT.NH; Hartford, Hawks, UH, Northeast, 9E1B32, 6C6F70, 54, PA, PA.DE.MD.DC; Northeastern, Huskies, NU, Northeast, D41B2C, 000000, 55, MA, MA; LIU Brooklyn, Blackbirds, LIUB, Northeast, 000000, AAAAAA, 52, NY, NY.NJ; Old Dominion, Monarchs, ODU, Northeast, 003057, 7C878E, 50, VA, VA.DE; St. Joseph’s, Hawks, STJOSU, Northeast, C02427, 0F0708, 65, CT, CT.MA; Temple, Owls, TEMP, Northeast, 9D2235, C1C6C8, 60, PA, PA.DE.MD.DC; Buffalo, Bulls, BUFF, Northeast, 005BBB, FFFFFF, 69, NY, NY.PA; Miami, Hurricanes, MIAMI, Atlantic, 005030, FF671F, 78, FL, FL; Boston College, Eagles, BC, Atlantic, 98002E, BC9B6A, 66, MA, MA.RI.ME; Florida State, Seminoles, FSU, Atlantic, 782F40, CEB888, 78, FL, FL; Clemson, Tigers, CLEM, Atlantic, F56600, 522D80, 66, SC, SC; Virginia Tech, Hokies, VTECH, Atlantic, 6A2C3E, CF4520, 80, VA, VA; Pittsburgh, Panthers, PITT, Atlantic, 1C2957, CDB87D, 64, PA, PA.OH.WV; Virginia, Cavaliers, VU, Atlantic, 232D4B, F84C1E, 87, VA, VA; Syracuse, Orange, SYR, Atlantic, D44500, 6F777D, 78, NY, NY; Georgia Tech, Yellow Jackets, GTECH, Atlantic, B3A369, 003057, 65, GA, GA; Louisville, Cardinals, UL, Atlantic, AD0000, 000000, 75, KY, KY.OH; Wake Forest, Demon Deacons, WFU, Atlantic, A67F31, 000000, 77, NC, NC; Duke, Blue Devils, DUKE, Atlantic, 0736A4, FFFFFF, 90, NC, NC.SC; North Carolina, Tar Heels, UNC, Atlantic, 7BAFD4, FFFFFF, 84, NC, NC.SC; NC State, Wolfpack, NCSU, Atlantic, CC0000, 000000, 73, NC, NC; VCU, Rams, VCU, Atlantic, FFB300, 000000, 65, VA, VA; Davidson, Wildcats, DAV, Atlantic, AC1A2F, 000000, 64, NC, NC; Illinois, Illini, UI, Midwest, E84A27, 13294B, 85, IL, IL; Northwestern, Wildcats, NWEST, Midwest, 4E2A84, FFFFFF, 68, I

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

I am a US Army veteran who is looking to transfer to Brown from Monmouth University. I have already submitted my application and I’m now anxiously waiting for a decision. If there are any military affiliated students who could share their experience I would greatly appreciate it!

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This is part one of this list. This list is based off of accomplishments in the NBA (or ABA), not college or international leagues. Please let me know of any mistakes or if I missed something.

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Key:

AS - All-Star

AN - All-NBA, All-ABA, All-BAA

AD - All-Defensive

AR - All-Rookie

MVP - Most Valuable Player

FMVP- Finals Most Valuable Player

DPOY - Defensive Player of the Year

6MOY - Sixth Man of the Year

MIP- Most Improved Player

COTY - Coach of the Year

EOTY- Executive of the Year

ScrC - Points Leader

AstC - Assists Leader

RebC - Rebounds Leader

StlC - Steals Leader

BlkC - Blocks Leader

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Acadia University (1): Brian Heaney (1969-70) - 2.0/0.3/0.4 - 14 G

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Akron (4): Bill Turner (1967-1973) - 5.4/3.5/0.6 - 294 G

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Alabama (32): Latrell Sprewell (1992-2005) - 18.3/4.1/4.0 - 913 G - 4x AS, 1x AN, 1x AD, AR

Honorable Mentions: Antonio McDyess, Robert Horry, Mo Williams, Gerald Wallace

Active: JaMychal Green, Collin Sexton, Kira Lewis Jr, Herb Jones, Joshua Primo

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Alabama A&M (1): Mickell Gladness (2011-12) - 2.2/2.2/0.2 - 26 G

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Alabama at Birmingham (11): Elijah Millsap (2015-2017) - 4.2/2.8/1.1 - 69 G

Active: Nate Darling

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Alabama State (2): Kevin Loder (1981-84) - 5.9/2.3/1.2 - 148 G

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Alabama-Huntsville (1): Josh Magette (2017-20) - 2.2/1.0/2.4 - 26 G

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Albany State (5): Caldwell Jones (1973-1990) - 7.9/8.2/1.4 - 1299 G - 1x AS, 2x AD

Honorable Mention: Wil Jones

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Albertson College of Idaho (1): Elgin Baylor (1958-72) - 27.4/13.5/4.3 - 846 G - HOF, 11x AS, 10x AN, ROY

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Alcorn State (6): Lindsey Hunter (1993-2010) - 8.5/2.2/2.7 - 937 G - 2x Champ, AR

Honorable Mention: Larry Smith

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Alliance College (1): Don Asmonga (1953-54) - 0.7/0.1/0.7 - 7 G

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American (2): Kermit Washington (1973-82, 1987) - 9.2/8.3/1.4 - 507 G - 1x AS, 2x AD

Honorable Mention: Andre Ingram

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American International (1): Mario Elie (1990-2001) - 8.6/2.8/2.6 - 732 G - 3x Champ

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Appalachian State (1): Belus Smawley (1947-51) - 12.7/2.8/23 - 261 G

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Arizona (60): Gilbert Arenas (2001-12) - 20.7/3.9/5.3 - 552 G - 3x AS, 3x AN, MIP

Honorable Mentions: Andre Iguodala, Jason Terry, Richard Jefferson, Mike Bibby, Damon Stoudamire, Steve Kerr

Active: Deandre Ayton, Aaron Gordon, Josh Green, Solomon Hill, Andre Iguodala, Stanley Johnson, Lauri Markkanean, TJ McConnell, Zeke Nnaji

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Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

They were cooked in Greece.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

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Scroll to bottom for FAQ.

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