Mcdermott International Puns

There have been rumors of a possible expansion, so let’s imagine it does happen, but the NBA decides to only add one new team to the league (sorry Vegas), bringing back the beloved Seattle Supersonics. The Sonics are back babbyyyyyyyy!

Now the Sonics need to build their team from ground up, starting with the expansion draft, and following it with signing players in the off-season.

Here are some simplified terms of the expansion draft:

1. All 30 NBA teams will have the right to protect 8 players on their roster. Anyone on the current roster is protectable, including restricted free agents. If a restricted free agent is left unprotected by his former team, he is available for selection by the Supersonics, who would then hold his Bird Rights for the up-coming off-season. Teams will typically have 4-7 players unprotected. Unrestricted free agents can neither be protected from nor selected in the expansion draft -- they are essentially ignored.
   Players who are likely to be left unprotected by their former teams include aging, overpaid veterans, unproven bench players, players who do not fit in financially with their team, or who disrupt team chemistry.
2. The Sonics may only select 1 player per team.
3. The Sonics must work within 2/3 of the normal rules of the NBA salary cap, so there will be salary-related restrictions which apply to the team's selections. The team’s salary cap for the 2022-2023 season will only be 2/3 of the league cap (112.414 million), meaning 74.93 million. The minimum team salary is also 2/3 of the leagues' minimum team salary (101.173 million), meaning 67.449 million.
   The expansion draft occurs after the conclusion of the 2022 NBA Finals, but prior to the 2022 NBA Draft. The Sonics do not participate in the lottery, but automatically get the 5th and the 35th pick of the draft.
4. There are no restrictions on player positions during the draft.
5. The Sonics must select at least 14 players.
6. Here is a list of the players that each NBA team are, in my opinion, likely to protect, and a list of those who may be left unprotected (not all players are listed, but most of them, and all that have any chance of being drafted by an expansion team):

Atlanta Hawks:

Protected:

1. Trae Young
2. John Collins
3. Clint Capela
4. Kevin Huerter
5. De’Andre Hunter
6. Onyeka Okongwu
7. Bogdan Bogdanovic
8. Cam Reddish

Unprotected (Salary this year, Years left on the contract)

1. Jalen Johnson (2.6 million, 3 years)

This is part one of this list. This list is based off of accomplishments in the NBA (or ABA), not college or international leagues. Please let me know of any mistakes or if I missed something.

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Key:

AS - All-Star

AN - All-NBA, All-ABA, All-BAA

AD - All-Defensive

AR - All-Rookie

MVP - Most Valuable Player

FMVP- Finals Most Valuable Player

DPOY - Defensive Player of the Year

6MOY - Sixth Man of the Year

MIP- Most Improved Player

COTY - Coach of the Year

EOTY- Executive of the Year

ScrC - Points Leader

AstC - Assists Leader

RebC - Rebounds Leader

StlC - Steals Leader

BlkC - Blocks Leader

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Acadia University (1): Brian Heaney (1969-70) - 2.0/0.3/0.4 - 14 G

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Akron (4): Bill Turner (1967-1973) - 5.4/3.5/0.6 - 294 G

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Alabama (32): Latrell Sprewell (1992-2005) - 18.3/4.1/4.0 - 913 G - 4x AS, 1x AN, 1x AD, AR

Honorable Mentions: Antonio McDyess, Robert Horry, Mo Williams, Gerald Wallace

Active: JaMychal Green, Collin Sexton, Kira Lewis Jr, Herb Jones, Joshua Primo

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Alabama A&M (1): Mickell Gladness (2011-12) - 2.2/2.2/0.2 - 26 G

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Alabama at Birmingham (11): Elijah Millsap (2015-2017) - 4.2/2.8/1.1 - 69 G

Active: Nate Darling

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Alabama State (2): Kevin Loder (1981-84) - 5.9/2.3/1.2 - 148 G

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Alabama-Huntsville (1): Josh Magette (2017-20) - 2.2/1.0/2.4 - 26 G

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Albany State (5): Caldwell Jones (1973-1990) - 7.9/8.2/1.4 - 1299 G - 1x AS, 2x AD

Honorable Mention: Wil Jones

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Albertson College of Idaho (1): Elgin Baylor (1958-72) - 27.4/13.5/4.3 - 846 G - HOF, 11x AS, 10x AN, ROY

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Alcorn State (6): Lindsey Hunter (1993-2010) - 8.5/2.2/2.7 - 937 G - 2x Champ, AR

Honorable Mention: Larry Smith

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Alliance College (1): Don Asmonga (1953-54) - 0.7/0.1/0.7 - 7 G

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American (2): Kermit Washington (1973-82, 1987) - 9.2/8.3/1.4 - 507 G - 1x AS, 2x AD

Honorable Mention: Andre Ingram

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American International (1): Mario Elie (1990-2001) - 8.6/2.8/2.6 - 732 G - 3x Champ

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Appalachian State (1): Belus Smawley (1947-51) - 12.7/2.8/23 - 261 G

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Arizona (60): Gilbert Arenas (2001-12) - 20.7/3.9/5.3 - 552 G - 3x AS, 3x AN, MIP

Honorable Mentions: Andre Iguodala, Jason Terry, Richard Jefferson, Mike Bibby, Damon Stoudamire, Steve Kerr

Active: Deandre Ayton, Aaron Gordon, Josh Green, Solomon Hill, Andre Iguodala, Stanley Johnson, Lauri Markkanean, TJ McConnell, Zeke Nnaji

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After finishing up my little series on 2010s serial killers, I've decided to move on to the 2000s. The purpose of this list is to again show that serial murder wasn't something that only occurred in the 70s, 80s, and 90s, and that there have been many active serial killers in the US since then. Sorry that some of these are quite long, but I think you'll find the details interesting!

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-William Howell: AKA the New Britain Serial Killer or the Sick Ripper. Abducting and murdering 7 women in and around New Britain, CT throughout 2003 while living in his van, William Howell is the most prolific serial killer in Connecticut state history. All 7 of his victims were sex workers or drug addicts, one of whom was trans, and all were found buried in a wooded area behind a shopping center. All had been strangled, and a few also suffered blunt force trauma to the head. Howell would lure his victims into his van, which he called his "murder mobile" and would then bind and hold them captive for up to 12 hours, driving his victims around and raping them repeatedly in various parking lots, sometimes in broad daylight. He would even go through fast food drive-thrus with victims bound and hidden in the back of the van. Strangely enough, he would ask his victims if they wanted anything, and would buy them food if they requested it, later saying it "felt like the right thing to do." Howell used plastic grocery bags as an alarm system, taping them to his victims hands and threating to kill them if he heard plastic rustling as he drove. The ground was frozen when he attempted to bury his first victim, so he wrapped her body in plastic and stored it in the back of his van, sometimes cuddling the body as he slept. Howell later removed the jaws, teeth, and fingertips of this victim, throwing them away in a dollar store trash can before eventually burying her.

-Larme Price: AKA the September 11 Killer. Active in early 2003, Price killed 4 men in New York City, NY. All 4 of the victims had been shot, and all were shopkeepers of middle-eastern ethnicity who were murdered at their places of business. He claims that he committed the string of slayings as an act of revenge for the September 11 terror attacks.

-Derrick Todd Lee: AKA the Baton Rouge Serial Killer or the Ghost of Baton Rouge. Easily one of the most infamous and terrifying serial killers of the 2000s, Derrick Todd Lee terrorized Baton Rouge, LA in the 1990s and early 2000s, raping and killing w

Do your worst!

It really does, I swear!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

Buenosdillas

Pilot on me!!