Lois Maxwell Puns

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Many people when criticizing A View to a Kill immediately point out how nearly 60 year old Roger Moore was too old to plausibly play James Bond. AVTAK was also Lois Maxwell's last appearance as Ms. Moneypenny (having played the role since the very beginning in 1962).

Lois was roughly, the same age as Roger and she was replaced by Caroline Bliss once Timothy Dalton took over (a younger Bond logically, needed a younger Moneypenny). Maybe we don't focus in on Lois too much like Roger Moore out of fear of immediately being labeled sexist.

Looking at photos of Lois, it really occurred to me how attractive (I was also shocked to learn that she was actually Canadian, not British) she was as a young woman: https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-CqM2Gbmsn60/UEjgBt1Je8I/AAAAAAAATF8/secXZFzq5_o/w800-h800/Lois%2BMaxwell%2B%2B%2B%2B%2B%2B02.jpg

http://www.for-your-eyes-only.com/Site/Lois_Maxwell_obit_files/lois-maxwell-Playboy.jpg

http://leadinglightsautographs.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/m/a/maxwell.jpg

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-xdKDuejol50/UEjgGvgXe1I/AAAAAAAATG0/izqaFAqB0BM/w800-h800/Lois%2BMaxwell%2B%2B%2B%2B%2B%2B08.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iupHtE0M7kg/U2Sx4qXm0WI/AAAAAAAAKs0/wKy91Pyj_qI/s1600/Lois+Maxwell.jpg

I immediately wonder if smoking took a toll on Lois' skin: http://storage.vancouver.24hrs.ca/v1/dynamic_resize/sws_path/suns-prod-images/1297768169943_ORIGINAL.jpg?quality=80&size=810x&stmp=1446670317256

http://www.007museum.com/russiawl17.jpg

http://www.kinokai.de/pics/content/71.jpg

https://yooniqimages.blob.core.windows.net/yooniqimages-data-storage-resizedimagefilerepository/List/21630/6c982590-f1ec-4d1e-a31e-af76ab129b41/YooniqImages_216300045.jpg

Lois really started to look "worn out" around The Man With the Golden Gun: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-t-Z6p-Qo7uc/Tf-Se5gLlsI/AAAAAAAABQY/bEJ1M5XnXWw/s1600/lois+maxwell+tmwtgg.gif

This is the first in a new, ongoing series of posts in which I share my detailed thoughts on each Bond film, and welcome you to do the same. For each movie I'll start with an overview that sort of sets the stage, then do a point-by-point analysis that will include anything I find particularly noteworthy, be it something good or something bad. I'll cap it off with a concluding paragraph or two summarizing my overall feelings, and even attempt to rate the movies as I go, which is something I've never really tried to do before in earnest. As we'll be proceeding in chronological order, the first one is, of course, Dr. No.

Overview

Back when Dr. No was released, action movies as we know them didn't really exist. There was nothing comparable to, say, the Schwarzenegger and Stallone flicks of the eighties and nineties. If you wanted action, you went to see a Western or a WWII pic, and even those weren't exactly The Expendables. Such as it was, Dr. No seems particularly electric and visceral with its fast-paced story, its cavorting with beautiful women (in a time before the sexual revolution had really gotten underway), and its extraordinary depictions of violence (many critics at the time were put off). Whenever I sit down to watch Dr. No, I like to put myself into a 1962 mindset; I've never heard of James Bond or Sean Connery, and the darkest movie I've ever seen is John Ford's The Searchers. This makes the movie all the more fascinating and exciting.

Point-By-Point

• Let's start with the gun barrel and titles. What a dynamite way to open a movie. Take a moment to appreciate the implications of a dude firing a bullet directly at the screen, and then the screen turning red with blood. I wonder if any WWII or Korea veterans lost their shit when they saw that. Then it immediately launches into the dramatic, electrifying theme that would become the character's signature, accompanied by colored dots/lights. After that, we're treated to a trio of silhouettes writhing madly to a hot Calypso beat, which gives the impression of exotica and danger, and lets us know that we're going to a place with which we may be unfamiliar (and not just in the geographical sense). Finally, we get the rendition of 'Three Blind Mice', at once both whimsical and macabre. I had actually read the novel Doctor No before seeing the movie, so when I saw the silhouettes of the three "blind" men tapping their canes along to the lively rhythm, I was all like, "Ah! Ah, I

Here's just a fun thing I did when utterly bored at home while recovering from my broken knee.

What if... Warner Bros. didn't own any DC IP and Kevin Feige was a bigger fan of DC Comics than of Marvel Comics so in 2008 he kickstarts a global cinematic phenomenon with a small DC Studios movie called The Batman?

I tried my best to come up with a fun ensemble of characters for each movie, I've not thought of the plots or actors though, I'm just following the MCU timeline and reframing it to this alternate universe DCCU (DC Cinematic Universe) and hopefully telling an intriguing story just by the movie titles and list of characters. Also I'm just listing the metahuman characters (Steve Trevor and ARGUS are an exception), so no Lois Lane or Alfred Pennyworth, we can automatically assume that they are present. I did however let myself be inspired by existing DC movies, for example The Batman's cast of characters is the same as The Batman 2022 but just imagine that the plot is different, I've also snuck in The Suicide Squad and Shazam! exactly as they are in real life just because they're great movies. The Suicide Squad's the only film in this DCCU slate that has no MCU equivalent. Enjoy!

Phase One

• The Batman (Iron Man) - Catwoman, Penguin, Riddler, Court of Owls
• Martian Manhunter (The Incredible Hulk) - ARGUS, Cay'an, White Martians
• The Batman Part II (Iron Man 2) - Robin, Black Canary, Steve Trevor, ARGUS, Killer Croc, Mr Freeze, Harley Quinn, Hugo Strange
• Wonder Woman (Thor) - Steve Trevor, ARGUS, Circe, Doctor Psycho, Cheetah
• Superman: Son of Tomorrow (Captain America: The First Avenger) - Mr Mxyzptlk, Phantom Zone Prisoners, General Zod
• Justice League (The Avengers) - Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Steve Trevor, Parademons, Circe

Phase Two

• The Batman Part III (Iron Man 3) - Robin, Scarecrow, Bane, Two-Face, Harley Quinn, Joker
• Wonder Woman: Realm of Darkness (Thor: The Dark World) - Steve Trevor, Hippolyta, Circe, Minotaur, Hades
• Superman: Son of Hope (Captain America: The Winter Soldier) - Supergirl, Steel, Mr Mxyzptlk, Brainiac, Doomsday
• Green Lantern Corps^starringjohnstewart (Guardians of the Galaxy) - Kilowog, Bd'g, Stel, Boodikka, Eddore, Sinestro, Despero, Krona
• Justice League: International (Avengers: Age of Ultron) - Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter, Green Arrow, Black Canary, Hawkgirl, Zatanna, Steel, Maxwell Lord, Brother Eye
• Cyborg (Ant-Man) -

Lois Maxwell's Moneypenny was often able to get sarcastic at Bond, but it's no secret she was in love with him. Dalton's Moneypenny was even more in love, and I got the idea she was ready to do literally ANYTHING for him. Brosnan's MP initially seemed to be way more emancipated and not interested in Bond, but in Die Another Day we discovered that he was her sexual desire. In the Craig tenure, Moneypenny is the least interested to have an affair with Bond and the only one to treat him just like a work colleague. Even at the end of NTTD she's the one to have the least emotional reaction to Bond's death.

Do your worst!

As the biggest Timmverse/DCAU fan,I figured I'd just share some ways the DCAU influenced mainstream comics and other media. This is a long list so brace yourself.(Some of these are from DCAU wiki and other sources)

1 Added Characters to mainstream comics- such as Harley Quinn, Livewire, Renee Montoya, Mercy Graves, Warhawk,Roxy Rocket, Volcana, Lock-up and Gray Ghost. They were only created for the DCAU, but popularity got them integrated into the mainstream comics

2 Fixed some characters- Mr Freeze and Mad Hatter were just joke villains, but Batman TAS made you able to take them seriously. In Two-Face: Year One, Harvey Dent is shown seeing a psychiatrist about his anger problems like he was in the Batman: The Animated Series episode "Two-Face". The psychiatrist theorizes that it's due to another side of Harvey's personality. Also, Harvey's file is stolen from the psychiatrist's office to use against him.The original Clayface from the comics, Basil Karlo, had certain attributes adapted into the animated incarnation of Matt Hagen, who, in the comics, was the second Clayface. However, after Batman: The Animated Series finished airing, Karlo joined up with various other persons that have gone by the title of Clayface (in a group known as the Mudpack) and absorbed all of their combined shape-shifting powers. After this, his size and appearance became much more like that of the animated version of Matt Hagen. A recent figure release in the DC Universe Classics line even has Clayface identified as Basil Karlo, but with the exact same appearance as the animated version. The DCAU version of the Clock King (Temple Fugate) was a complete reinvention from the original (named William Tockman). In Teen Titans #56, the Temple Fugate version of the character was introduced into the comics younger, more psychotic, and with precognitive abilities as opposed to an excellent sense of timing.Waylon Jones was originally (and was consistently referred to as) a human with a very rare skin condition. Batman: The Animated Series made a point of introducing him as a mutated human with reptilian attributes to his body (and seemingly his DNA). Batman examining one of his teeth and finding it to have both human and reptilian characteristics confirms that Croc in the DCAU seems to be a genuine "lizard man". Throughout the past decade, the comics have slowly made him more and more reptilian, mentioning in the Hush storyline that his body is mutating rapidly due to a virus given to h

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aaron abbey abbie abby abdul abe abel abigail abraham abram ada adah adalberto adaline adam adan addie adela adelaida adelaide adele adelia adelina adeline adell adella adelle adena adina adolfo adolph adria adrian adriana adriane adrianna adrianne adrien adriene adrienne afton agatha agnes agnus agripina agueda agustin agustina ahmad ahmed ai aida aide aiko aileen ailene aimee aisha aja akiko akilah al alaina alaine alan alana alane alanna alayna alba albert alberta albertha albertina albertine alberto albina alda alden aldo alease alec alecia aleen aleida aleisha alejandra alejandrina alejandro alena alene alesha aleshia alesia alessandra aleta aletha alethea alethia alex alexa alexander alexandra alexandria alexia alexis alfonso alfonzo alfred alfreda alfredia alfredo ali alia alica alice alicia alida alina aline alisa alise alisha alishia alisia alison alissa alita alix aliza alla allan alleen allegra allen allena allene allie alline allison allyn allyson alma almeda almeta alona alonso alonzo alpha alphonse alphonso alta altagracia altha althea alton alva alvaro alvera alverta alvin alvina alyce alycia alysa alyse alysha alysia alyson alyssa amada amado amal amalia amanda amber amberly ambrose amee amelia america ami amie amiee amina amira ammie amos amparo amy an ana anabel analisa anamaria anastacia anastasia andera anderson andra andre andrea andreas andree andres andrew andria andy anette angel angela angele angelena angeles angelia angelic angelica angelika angelina angeline angelique angelita angella angelo angelyn angie angila angla angle anglea anh anibal anika anisa anisha anissa anita anitra anja anjanette anjelica ann anna annabel annabell annabelle annalee annalisa annamae annamaria annamarie anne anneliese annelle annemarie annett annetta annette annice annie annika annis annita annmarie anthony antione antionette antoine antoinette anton antone antonetta antonette antonia antonietta antonina antonio antony antwan anya apolonia april apryl ara araceli aracelis aracely arcelia archie ardath ardelia ardell ardella ardelle arden ardis ardith aretha argelia argentina ariana ariane arianna arianne arica arie ariel arielle arla arlean arleen arlen arlena arlene arletha arletta arlette arlie arlinda arline arlyne armand armanda armandina armando armida arminda arnetta arnette arnita arnold arnoldo arnulfo aron arron art arthur artie arturo arvilla asa asha ashanti ashely ashlea ashlee ashleigh ashley ashli ashlie ashly ashlyn ashton asia asley a

It really does, I swear!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

Buenosdillas

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

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What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!

##Superman #66 - Superwars

<< | < | >

Author: MajorParadox

Book: Superman

Arc: Power Shift

Set: 66

###How Did We Get Here?

Metropolis Children's Hospital

Ten Months Ago

Maxwell watched the TV screen from his bed. It was all he could do. Since the accident, he was completely paralyzed. Sure, his parents were still hopeful he could pull through, but he heard the doctors. Nothing short of a miracle was going to get him out of that bed.

“Excuse me,” a young woman said from the doorway. “Mr. and Mrs. Williams?”

Maxwell’s parents stood up from their chairs. “Can we help you?” his dad asked.

“No,” the woman answered. “But I think I can help you. My name is Lena Luthor and I think LexCorp may be able to help your son.”

Metropolis Harbor

Nine Months Ago

Horatio Strong walked down the sidewalk toward his wife Olivia’s boutique. They had been meeting for lunch every day this week and it had become the highlight of his day. Maybe next week-

Across the street, the door to a 6/21 Convenience door burst open and a man in a ski mask, holding a gun, ran outside.

Horatio placed a hand in his pocket, feeling the nearly empty bag. Maybe he wouldn’t need it. He ran across the street and tackled the robber to the ground. A couple more men ran up to him, pulling him away and the robber pistol whipped him across the face.

The group left Horatio lying there as they fled. He reached into his pocket and pulled out some black stringy substance, kind of like seaweed. “Strong to the finish,” he said as he ingested a handful of it.

The robber and his accomplices reached their car, but Horatio landed on top of it, crushing the roof.

A man nearby watched as Horatio laid them out. He approached slowly as Horatio pulled out the empty bag from his pocket.

“We can help you,” the bearded man said.

“‘We’?” asked Horatio.

“Allow me to introduce myself,” the same explained. “I am Lionel Luthor, CEO of LexCorp. We are starting a program to support heroes like yourself.”

Outside S.T.A.R. Labs

Eight Months Ago

Karen Lou Faulkner, known to her friends and colleagues as “Kitty,” was lost. Not geographically, she

You take away their little brooms

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