A list of puns related to "Like A Surgeon"
And the doctor said, "You look normal to me".
Dad Awards
To truly capture the “Spirit of the Dad” what are some achievements you think make a True Dad?
“Fixed it!” - complete an entire home improvement project in a single trip to the hardware/lumber store.
“Gotcha!” - demonstrate the Dad Reflex by catching a toddler seconds before disaster.
“That’s my boy/girl!” - get in trouble with the SO when your son/daughter picked up a bad habit of yours, or develops your bad sense of humor/pranks.
“Here boy!” - develop a stronger bond with the new family pet than any of the kids who wanted it in the first place.
“Office time” - spend at least 30 minutes in the bathroom hiding from the kids/spouse even though you don’t actually have to go to the bathroom.
“Blame it on the dog” - make at least one passenger choke on a fart in the car.
“Really?” - have a kid/spouse completely buy in to one of your bad dad jokes. (I had my wife convinced for nearly an hour that the rumble strips on the side of the highway was called the “Brailleway” and it was for blind drivers)
“But the kids will love it!” - use the kids as justification to purchase something that you’ve always wanted.
“Try it, you’ll like it!” - introduce a kid into your hobby as an excuse to go out more often than the spouse would usually tolerate.
“Saved the day!” - prevent a meltdown by fixing the favorite toy that seemed completely destroyed.
“Animal surgeon” - conduct ‘surgery’ to patch up a favorite stuffed animal.
“Here, let me show you” - take over a video game under the guise of showing the kid how to play.
What else can you add to this list?
...he tells the owner and bartender that he’s a surgeon down at the hospital and he just wants to forget about everything for awhile.
Dick knows just the thing. He quickly whips up a thick, exotic beverage and places it in front of the worn out doctor. He takes one sip and his eyes light up. “What IS that?” “That’s my signature almond daiquiri”, Dick tells him. The surgeon tells him it’s delicious, pays his bill and comes back the next day and the next day at the same time for the same thing: An almond daiquiri.
Before long, like clockwork, Dick is able to have it ready for him just before he comes in. But, one day as he is preparing the drink, he realizes that he’s run out of almonds! With no time to lose, he quickly substitutes the almonds with hickory nuts and sets the beverage on the bar.
The surgeon pops in, takes a big gulp, and immediately spits it all over the bar. He looks at the bartender and says, “That’s not an almond daiquiri, Dick!” And Dick says, “No, it’s a hickory daiquiri, Doc!”.
Wow, neuro-surgeon huh... I'd like to pick your brain....
He did not get it...
(those type of pun opportunities dont come to mind that often...) ((another one bitches))
Hi Folks, If you are a linguist then I am selling your dream car! I’m selling an Accent, a 2004 Hyundai Accent to be precise. Even if you don’t know a bunch of languages, this car is still great for you.
Just like me, it’s been around the birthday block a few times, but there’s still lots of life left in both of us, I guarantee! If you are looking for the perfect body, seek out a surgeon. If you’re looking for a car that will love you just the way you are, this is it. Now I know what you’re thinking, “I bet this is a junker”, but you’d be wrong. Next to my wife this is the best body I’ve ever had my hands on.
What’s wrong with it mechanically you ask? Nothing! It drives great, A/C & heat still work like a dream, breaks work, transmission shifts good, and the 1.6L engine runs great. With its age, the engine has had some parts replaced. All the belts have recently been changed, that happens with age as I just went up a few sizes myself. The washer fluid pump has been changed because it’s important to be able to have a good cry once in a while. I did an oil change in the summer and depending on how long it takes for this car to finds it’s new match, I will do another in the next month or so.
Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I’ll give you a run down of what the interior is like. It’s what’s on the inside that matters anyway right? I am the 3rd owner of this car and the previous owner was a smoker. I don’t believe there is a cigarette smell anymore but the cloth seats do have little holes in them. I mean hey, when you play with fire you get burnt right? The stereo head unit has been replaced with a modern Pioneer as the original just wasn’t in tune with my musical needs as a Dj. The only real problem this pretty young thing has is the passenger rear seatbelt does not retract. Since I have two mini controllers I taxi around, I’ve had car seats in the back and have had no reason to replace the seatbelt yet. A new one is only a cool $250 from Hyundai but will take some time for delivery. There are still 4 working seatbelts in the car so if you’re traveling with another couple, I’m sure they’ll love to cuddle up in the middle and behind you, the driver.
The trunk is spacious enough for the average trunk but just doesn’t work out so well for hauling Dj gear. The rear seats fold as easy a poker player having their bluff called, so it will give you extra room. Not much more that I can think of to tell you about but take a look at the plethora of p
... keep reading on reddit ➡I had this dream, I was at my Grandparent's house, and my grandfather was doing some sort of hand surgery on me, my bones were all showing and he was taking out some calcified tissue that was stuck to my bones. It was pretty weird and very graphic.
My coworker says "Wow, that's so weird! Does he do something like that for a living?"
I say, "Well no, he isn't a surgeon, but he is quite the handy man!"
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