Happy Ho.idays to friends and .oved ones c.ose and far. B.essings to you and yours this Yu.e season.
(This is my No-L greeting.)
My daughter: dad, what key is the national anthem in?
Me: I think it's in...... Francis Scott key.
True story
It’s all in the name
There’s some really nice girls in my sons class; Denice, Janice, Olive Yu. So I figured a name is a powerful motivator. Meet my newest kid: Richy Mc Richer(Son)
Who's Yu?
People always tell me to fuck him
What do you call Sir Francis Drake's circumnavigation of the Earth?
TIL: During the Ming dynasty, there were two princes Hu and Yu ready to take over the throne. Hu was older, but a unlucky man.
Hu died and made Yu king.
I changed my religion to follow the teachings of St. Francis, my dad was not pleased
He said 'no son of mine is going to be assisi!'
I'd ask for assistance from St. Francis...
Just finished reading a book on Channel swimming.
It was written by Francis Near.
I always take a first date out to a French restaurant. Girls love eating somewhere francy.
I don’t know who became more famous, Sir Francis Bacon or his son
How many ears did Sir Francis Drake have?
Loads. A left ear, a right ear and a ship full of privateers.
How did Chinese-American business man Robert Nigel Yu get free money from the bank?
When the teller asked for his name he said, "I am Rob N. Yu."
My Wife lost the race to Sister Mary Francis
Apparently, she was second to nun.
I knew this girl named Val Yu...
She worked at Walmart, it was great.
Who is the patron saint of copying people in emails?
My wife and I are considering adoption.
We just need to figure out where to sign our kids up.
The St. Francis statue in my mom's garden fell over and is lying on its side.
Now he's St. Francis of Asleepy.
I was surprised to learn my family had never heard of the patron Saint of e-mails
So I had to tell them about Saint Francis of A CC
I'm putting an addition on my roof.
It's a little room where I can sit and watch movies like The Godfather and Apocalypse Now.
It's a Francis Ford Cupola.
I didn’t know why the baseball was getting bigger.
Mountains aren't just funny
I don't want to sound raceist but...
I've always preferred the 100m to the 200m
I just hired an Asian lawer...
This is just a list of 50 famous people but if they were birds.
- George Washwington
- Leonarcrow da Vinci
- Eagle Allen Poe
- Harry S. Toucan
- Teddy Dodosevelt
- Charles Duckens
- Octavian Owlgustus
- Flysaac Newton
- Benchicken Franklin
- Gullysses S. Grant
- Vincent Van Goose
- John Lhawk
- Charlecrane
- Pengthoven
- Nikquaila Tesla
- Jean-Jacques Roostsseau
- Charles Darwren
- Rheasus Christ
- Broodha
- King Loony XIV
- Nenepoleon Bonaparte
- Mahootma Gandhi
- Winstint Churchill
- Genghis Swan
- Pladove
- Aleggsander the Great
- Paul the Apostail
- Lark Twain
- Dante Aliturkey
- Michelangswallow
- Cardinal Marx
- Albatross Lincoln
- Robin E. Lee
- Adolf Swiftler
- Alextanager Hamilton
- Ibis Presley
- Ronald Raven
- Arnestotle
- Emuhammad
- Sir Francis Beakon
- Tchaikovskylark
- Christfowler Columbus
- Finchard Nixon
- Henry VIII
- Albert Einstork
- Thomas Jayfferson
- William Shrikespeare
- Woodcock Wilson
- King Chorioles I of England
- Johann Sebastian Flock
Edit: formatting
Who does Fergie think wrote the Star-Spangled Banner?
What did the Japanese street fighter say when he met the American?
Can you perform a spinning dragon uppercut
Dad joke straight outta compton
My buddies and I have a group chat going. One guy mentions how he downloaded Dillon Francis' new album and how shared it with us on Facebook. I asked him if he had Dr. Dre's new album so I could get it, but he said he forgot to look it up.
Another dude in the chat says, "so you forgot about Dre?"
I really like The Godfather and The Godfather 2.
Francis Ford made a Coppola great movies..
My friend has a bad habit of calling things gay. For whatever reason France came up, and he said France is Gay.
My wife couldn't make up her mind
Me: Of all the Yu's in China I'm sure there's no one called Pleezing
Her: What do you mean?
Me: There is no pleasing you
*Cue sarcastic moaning
I am guilty of most of these.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kjl1-UW4sYU
I assume this is relevant.
Who is the patron saint of email?
Who is the patron saint of copying people into emails?
Who is the Patron Saint of copying people into emails?
Who is the patron saint of emails?
Who is the patron saint of email?
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