Knud Rasmussen Puns

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

I am on page 6 of Knud Rasmussen's Under Nordenvindens Svøbe :)

I expect my Melin handwriting to improve quite a bit during the course of the book!

Written at speed.

https://preview.redd.it/gy2k3ck1wo071.jpg?width=1240&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d5a5faa394251f64680c944a046715cf479ceb1e

Do your worst!

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

The Algerian armed forces are one of the most well funded and well trained in Africa. Our consistently modern forces have allowed us to maintain an edge over our neighbours, a capability that remains especially important given the continued contentious nature of our relations. Furthermore, the top brass has made developing local defense industry capabilities a top priority for national security. Some of the requirements already have a buyer in mind, while others are accepting bids from several shortlisted candidates.

##Ground Forces

• We are looking to acquire the T-14 Armata to fulfill the role of main battle tank, replacing the ageing T-55 and T-62s and eventually potentially the T-72. This order will involve 500 units and we request that non-sensitive parts be assembled locally.

• For the role of IFV, Algerian officials are inviting Russia to submit the T-15 Armata and South Korea to submit its K21 PIP with Hyungung ATGM launchers. This order will be for 760 units to replace BMP-1s, with a further 300 for BMP-2 replacements if performance is satisfactory. Local production through a joint partnership with SNVI is a requirement.

• 126 MRLS need to be replaced, and Russia’s Tornado systems and China’s SR-5 systems have been shortlisted.

• Timeline for SAM systems have not been finalised, but Algeria is requesting assurances that it will continue to be allowed to purchase advanced Russian and Chinese systems.

##Air Force

• We request the cancellation of the current MiG-29 order to replace all MiG-29s with 48 MiG-35S since the program is now exporting.

• Finalising the contract for the purchase of 14 SU-57 to replace MiG-25s.

• Replacing SU-24s with 24 SU-34s.

##Navy

• The Algerian Navy is looking to procure 6 corvettes to replace its 3 Nanucka-class and boost its naval capabilities, with 3 being built locally and 3 built elsewhere. Currently shortlisted are the Sweidsh Visby-class and Chinese Type 056 P-18 Export variant. However, other nations are encouraged to submit bids.

• Algeria will replace its ageing Koni-class frigates by exercising its option for 3 more Adhafer-class from China and 2 more MEKO-A2000 from Germany.

• The 14 Kebir class patrol boats will be replaced by 12 Knud Rasmussen-class OPVs from Denmark for $76 million each, with 6 being constructed in Algeria. We also suggest Terma A/S open an office in Algeria to ensure smooth construction.

• Finally, we are looking for 2 more submarines, with the option for 2

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

JoeyBACON's 2021 IndyCar (and Road to Indy) Championship Spreadsheet Things after Road America

IndyCar

Laps Led Championship: https://i.imgur.com/xZNysfA.png

Just like everyone predicted, Max Chilton, Kevin Magnussen, and Oliver Askew all led multiple laps today. Max Chilton led his first laps since 2018, and Kevin Magnussen led 6 laps on his IndyCar debut.

Scott Dixon only led 1 lap today, but he still holds a 272-lap lead over Josef Newgarden, who's now jumped into 2nd place.

Road Course Championship: https://i.imgur.com/xj4iHab.png

It's a Ganassi 1-2-3 at the top of the Road Course Championship standings, with Alex Palou 32 points over his teammates. Dixon and Ericsson have both finished in the top 10 in every single road course race this year.

Rinus VeeKay led the road course standings by 1 point after Detroit, but he's unfortunately dropped to 8th after missing this weekend.

Oval Championship: https://i.imgur.com/x9NjGe3.png

We'll check back in on this after Gateway.

Entrant Points: https://i.imgur.com/r83ONfW.png

Things continue to look very bad for the Arrow McLaren SP #7, the Foyt #4, and the Carlin #59. Max Chilton finally scored his first top 10 for Carlin after 3 and a half seasons of trying, but that car is still 6 points behind the next-lowest car.

Indy Lights

Laps Led Championship: https://i.imgur.com/laKNudM.png

The Laps Led Championship has been switching between David Malukas and Kyle Kirkwood all season, but right now, it belongs to Malukas.

Toby Sowery led his first laps of the season after that crazy start in race 1, bringing the total number of drivers who have led laps this season to a whopping 4.

Indy Pro 2000

Laps Led Championship: https://i.imgur.com/mNzx5Vf.png

Not much has changed at the top, but Christian Rasmussen pulled 4 more laps on Reece Gold at the top of the standings.

Manuel Sulaiman led the most laps in race 1 and led a couple in race 2. If he can keep this form up, he might be able to start moving his way up the table and challenge the top 3.

USF2000

Laps Led Championship: https://i.imgur.com/VeZD83P.png

It's a similar situation in the USF2000 Laps Led Championship standings: not much change at the top, but a couple drivers further back are starting to make their way up.

Thomas Nepveu led his first laps of the season en route to his first USF2000 win in race 2, but he's got a long way to go if he wants to ch

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

A play on words.

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!