Jeffrey Lyons Puns

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https://www.mturk.com/mturk/searchbar?selectedSearchType=hitgroups&requesterId=ASN6CP4DVJ47V

A little writing towards the end to justify your responses.

http://adf.ly/qOeJf

Writing, survey, AC, might take longer depending on writing section

**EDIT: Apparently, there are multiple versions of the survey and some of those versions suck. Sorry, guys.

Good TO. AC and MC. Writing, so your time may vary. I was around 4 but I type fast.

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Kylian Mbappe (PSG)

Paul Pogba (Man Utd)

Paulo Dybala (Juventus)

Ousmane Dembele (Barcelona)

Franck Kessie (AC Milan)

Marcelo Brozovic (Inter)

Antonio Rudiger (Chelsea)

Lorenzo Insigne (Napoli)

Niklas Sule (Bayern Munich)

Andreas Christensen (Chelsea)

Andrea Belotti (Torino)

Denis Zakaria (Gladbach)

Sardar Azmoun (Zenit)

Boubacar Kamara (Marseille)

Matthias Ginter (Borussia Monchengladbach)

Remo Freuler (Atalanta)

Jesus Corona (Porto)

James Tarkowski (Burnley)

Alexandre Lacazette (Arsenal)

Jesse Lingard (Man Utd)

Alessio Romagnoli (AC Milan)

Jason Denayer (Lyon)

Todd Cantwell (Norwich)

Andrej Kramaric (Hoffenheim)

Nouassir Mazraoui (Ajax)

Luiz Felipe (Lazio)

Andre Onana (Ajax)

Florian Grillitsch (Hoffenheim)

David Brooks (Bournemouth)

Luis Suarez (Atletico Madrid)

Angel Di Maria (PSG)

Angel Di Maria Angel Di Maria

Isco (Real Madrid)

Sergi Roberto (Barcelona)

Serge Aurier (Villarreal)

Corentin Tolisso (Bayern Munich)

Federico Bernardeschi (Juventus)

Mbemba (Porto)

Dan-Axel Zagadou (Dortmund)

Sean Longstaff (Newcastle)

John Brooks (Wolfsburg)

Divock Origi (Liverpool)

Adnan Januzaj (Real Sociedad)

Calum Chambers (Arsenal)

Enis Bardhi (Levante)

Randal Kolo Muani (Nantes)

Cyle Larin (Besiktas)

Cesar Azpilicueta (Chelsea)

Samuel Gigot (Spartak Moscow)

Luka Modric (Real Madrid)

Luka Modric, Real Madrid Luka Modric, Real Madrid

Gareth Bale (Real Madrid)

Ivan Perisic (Inter)

Artem Dzyuba (Zenit)

Henrik Mkhitaryan (Roma)

Juan Cuadrado (Juventus)

Victor Claesson (Krasnodar)

Niklas Stark (Hertha)

Marvin Friedrich (Union Berlin)

Reinildo Mandava (Lille)

Eddie Nketiah (Arsenal)

Cristian Pavon (Boca Juniors)

Ben Brereton Diaz (Blackburn)

Sergio Asenjo (Villarreal)

Remy Cabella (Krasnodar)

Jose Luis Palomino (Atalanta)

Felipe (Atletico Madrid)

Mohamed Elneny (Arsenal)

Roman Saiss (Wolves)

Adum Marusic (Lazio)

Xeka (Lille)

Fedor Smolov (Lokomotiv Moscow)

Yacine Brahimi (Al-Rayyan)

Sam Johnstone (West Brom)

Jeffrey Schlupp (Crystal Palace)

Marcel Halstenberg (Leipzig)

Hugo Lloris (Tottenham)

Axel Witsel (Borussia Dortmund)

Filip Djuricic (Sassuolo)

Fabian Schar (Newcastle)

Jordan Ayew (Crystal Palace)

Matias Vecino (Inter)

Marc Oliver Kempf (Stuttgart)

Lys Mousset (Sheffield Utd)

Mattia De Sciglio (Juventus)

Robin Knoche (Union Berlin)

Cristian Tello (Real Betis)

Connor Goldson (Rangers)

Thomas Strakosha (Lazio)

Teemu Pukki (Norwich City)

Dries Mertens (Napoli)

Daniel Wass (Valencia)

 

 

 

12:00 PM - Centra

Someone wants to add more?

Breathing techniques:

• Wim Hof method for breathing: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tybOi4hjZFQ&vl=es

• SKY breathing—a technique involving cycling slow breathing (2-4 breaths per minute) then fast (30 breaths per minute), then three long “Om”s, or a long vibrating exhale

• Mind Body Soul: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLDrv1qSpibNWX_jCfdo1h0OpDZnvq6pJT

• Anxiety in Order (stop a panic attack): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vXZ5l7G6T2I&ab_channel=AnxietyinOrder

• Brain breathing: https://www.whatmakesithappen.com/brainbreathing

Emotional Freedom Techniques: Tapping

Psychodelic drugs:

• Psylocibine

• Ayahuasca

• Mescaline/San Pedro cactus

• Ibogaine

• ICEERS (International Center for Ethnobotanical Education, Research & Service)

• Beckley Foundation: https://www.beckleyfoundation.org/

• Erowid: https://www.erowid.org/

YouTube:

• NICAMB: https://youtu.be/G7zAseaIyFA

• Therapy in a Nutshell: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GZw8fRPK-8k&feature=youtu.be

• Andrew Huberman: https://m.youtube.com/channel/UC2D2CMWXMOVWx7giW1n3LIg

• TRE FOR ALL: https://youtu.be/FeUioDuJjFI

• Being Human Podcast: https://youtu.be/hFx2NEFeQew

• Enrealment media

• Irene Lyon

• Tim Fletcher

• Therapy Chat Podcast

• Patrick Teagan LICSW

• Dr. Trace Marks

• Dr. Carolina Leaf

• Somatic Experiencing International

• Wu Wei Wisdom

• APA Division 56 - Trauma Psychology

• Lourdes Viado PhD LMFT

• South Pacific Private

• Mental Health Power

• Dragon: https://youtu.be/U5qYyfWN8Kg

• DoctorRamani

• Surviving Narcissism

• RICHARD GRANNON

• Kati Morton

• Shaan Kassam: https://youtu.be/_P4q0LAvtec

• Brain Education TV

• gerlach: https://youtu.be/npRrO071Xks

• Jennifer May, Ph.D.

Chosing meditation type: https://youtu.be/MKoKdCyq0D8

• Yoga nidra

• Travis Eliot's Yin Yoga

• MaliaYoga: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBi-K9nkuQTj4uQNkF2CKbw

• Vinyasa Yoga

• 6 phase meditation: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oeQfRtiY-ZM&feature=youtu.be

• Self-love meditation: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3uckZLqh51k&ab_channel=MarisaPeer

• TM meditation

• Shadow Work meditation: https://youtu.be/Mlj8m4F5oaI

• Cheetah House: https://www.cheetahhouse.org

• The Progress of Insight: https://www.dharmaoverground.org/dharma-wiki/-/wiki/Main/MCTB+The+Progress+of+Insight

Journaling:

• Shadow Work: https://scottjeffrey.com/shadow-work/

• Printable journal: https://shop.lonerwolf.com/p

I guess the concept didn't work

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

• If you find your book in the thread below, send the number of the book via reddit chat or via telegram .
• Almost all the books are in their latest editions and some of them are available in multiple editions too
• Books (pdf) are delivered through Google-Drive link
• You can also send requests via reddit chat or by telegram .
• Also, upvote the post if you found it useful

Please find the list below:

12490.Hip Hop Reader, The (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Tim Strode, Tim Wood

12491.Wu Zhao: China's Only Female Emperor 1st edition N Harry Rothschild

12492.College Culture, Student Success (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Debra J. Anderson

12493.Chican@s in the Conversations (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Elizabeth R. Kessler, Anne Perrin

12494.Education Matters (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Morgan Gresham, Crystal McCage

12495.Legends, Lore, and Lies: A Skeptic's Stance (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Joseph Calabrese

12496.Case Studies in Special Education Law: No Child Left Behind Act and Individuals with Disabilities Education Improvement Act 1st edition Mary Konya Weishaar

12497.Body and Culture (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Greg Lyons

12498.Ethics in the 21st Century (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Mary Alice Trent

12499.Longman Anthology of Detective Fiction, The 1st edition Deane Mansfield-Kelley, Lois Marchino

12500.Language and Prejudice (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Tamara M. Valentine

12501.Guide to Interpersonal Communication (Guide to Business Communication Series) 1st edition Joann Baney

12502.Considering Cultural Difference (A Longman Topics Reader) 1st edition Pauline Uchmanowicz

12503.Transcreation of the Bhagavad Gita 1st edition Ashok Kumar Malhotra

12504.Varieties of Unbelief: From Epicurus to Sartre 1st edition J C. A. Gaskin

12505.Harry S. Truman and the Modern American Presidency (Library of American Biography Series) 1st edition Robert H. Ferrell

12506.John Marshall: Defender of the Constitution 1st edition

12507.Way of Lao Tzu, The 1st edition Wingtsit Chan

12508.Nicomachean Ethics: Aristotle 1st edition Martin Ostwald

12509.Organization 21C: Someday All Organizations Will Lead This Way 1st edition Subir Chowdhury

12510.My iPad 11th edition Gary Rosenzweig

12511.My iPad for Seniors 7th edition Michael Miller

12512.My iPad for Seniors

Yesterday I started collecting news stories involving royal racism. Doing so I found lots of other stories about the royal family. So I included them in an expanded document -- now called the Royal Rap Sheet, which includes actual crimes, alleged crimes, moral crimes and scandals.

This list is absolutely not exhaustive, but looking at just these allegations and scandals in one place really is quite alarming.

It is worth noting that, despite the list, only one royal (extended family notwithstanding), Princess Anne, has ever been convicted of a crime.

Feel free to highlight other stories in the comments and I'll try to add them in.

The Royal Rap Sheet

Exerting Political Influence

- The Queen:

· “Queen lobbied for change in law to hide her private wealth”: https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/feb/07/revealed-queen-lobbied-for-change-in-law-to-hide-her-private-wealth

· Royals vetted more than 1,000 laws via Queen’s consent – “the opaque procedure of Queen’s consent has been exercised far more extensively than was previously believed”: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9240109/The-Queen-Prince-Charles-vetted-1-000-laws-parliamentary-approval.html

· Police barred from searching Queen's estate for looted artefacts and palace refuses to state why exemption was necessary: https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/mar/25/revealed-police-barred-from-searching-queens-estates-for-looted-artefacts

· Used "Royal symbolism" to make Prince Andrew "untouchable" when he began to receive bad press and allegations of wrongdoing emerged: https://archive.vanityfair.com/article/share/ac60f552-4163-4d39-a36b-d2014fe20062

· Interfered in Australian politics -- 'These letters, with their clear and direct political prescription, make a mockery of the claim that the Queen played “no part” in the decision Kerr made': [https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/jul/17/letters-of-an-insecure-and-indiscreet-john-kerr-make-a-mockery-of-the-claim-that-the-queen-played-no-part](https://www.theguardian.com/commen

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

Heroes and Civilians, including the redeemed ones Jaden Torralba as himself Daniel Craig as the guardian spirit within the charm Amanda C. Miller as Boruto Uzumaki David Matranga as Shoto Todoroki Colleen Clinkenbeard as Momo Yaoyorozu, Monkey D. Luffy and Erza Scarlet Trina Nishimura as Kyoka Jiro, Kurisu Makise and Mikasa Ackerman Kyle Phillips as Denki Kaminari Luci Christian as Ochaco Uraraka and Nami Maile Flanagan as Naruto Uzumaki Justin Briner as Deku and Hanako-Kun James Woods as Did is a good ominic the Dragon Jason Liebrecht as Dabi Eric Vale as Tomura Shigaraki, Arthur Boyle and Sanji Clifford Chapin as Katsuki Bakugo and Connie Springer Philip Shahbaz as Altaïr Emily Neves as Eri Arnold Schwarzenegger as T-800 Cassandra Lee Morris as Leafa Jamie Marchi as Junko Enoshima, Panty, Liz Thompson and Cana Alberona Leah Clark as Himiko Toga Lucien Dodge as K1-B0 Kane Bailey as Matt Keanu Reeves as John Wick and Johnny Silverhand Joleene Douitsis as Sayori Seth MacFarlane as Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Brian Griffin and Peter Griffin Alex Borstein as Lois Griffin Seth Green as Chris Griffin Mila Kunis as Meg Griffin Jesús Guzmán/Mona Marshall as El Chavo Korone as herself Jason Sudeikis as Octodad Alessandro Juliani as L Lawliet Isabela Moner as Monika Jeremy Shada as Lance and Finn Morgan Garett as Yuuko Aioi Markiplier as himself Ricco Fajardo as Mirio Togata and Taiju Oki James Callis as Alucard Courtenay Taylor as Sergeant Hammer Spike Spencer as Shinji Ikari Amanda Winn-Lee as Rei Ayanami and Yukiko Amagi Tiffany Grant as Asuka Langley Soryu Allison Keith as Misato Katsuragi Matt LeBlanc as Isaac Tom Ridgewell, Matt Hargreaves, and Tord Larsson as themselves George Gould as Edd Carolina Ravassa as Sombra Jason Ritter as Dipper Pines Kristen Schaal as Mabel Pines Patrick Warburton as Joe Swanson Tom Cruise as Ethan Hunt and Purple Guy Derek Stephen Prince as Shino Aburame, Kokichi Ouma and Uryu Ishida Stephen Merchant as Wheatley Arif Zahir as Cleveland Brown Dan Castellaneta as Homer Simpson and Earthworm Jim Julie Kavner as Marge Simpson Nancy Cartwright as Bart Simpson Yeardley Smith as Lisa and Maggie Simpson Hank Azaria as Carl Carlson Harry Shearer as Ned Flanders, Lenny Leonard, Mr. Burns and Smithers Charlet Chung as D.Va Clifton Powell as Big Smoke Kira Buckland as Jolyne Cujoh, 2B, Rebecca Bluegarden, Kyoko and Mitsuri Kanroji Kyle McCarley as 9S, Mob, and Narancia Ghirga Cherami Leigh as Makoto Niijima, Asuna, Lucy Heartfilia, V, Pa

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

[removed]

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

They just don’t work!

http://adf.ly/pPEDa Probably repost, prior people seem to have finished this 3.5-7mins