Jan Žižka Puns

Jan Žižka was the military leader of the Hussites in the 15th century (specifically the Táborité Hussites and later the Sirotci Hussites,) and used innovative tactics to hold off three crusades. After that his tactics were used to hold off two more even after his death. For most of this he was without one of his eyes and towards the last moments of his life he was completely blind. He had never lost a battle, and his most famous victory had him outnumbered seven to one. I would easily consider him one of the best generals in history. So why is he never mentioned anywhere? We learned about him in our Czech education system, however, he isn’t mentioned anywhere else, and it’s hard to find any dedicated information about him unless you specifically search for it or already know his name. He is completely overlooked by most mayor historical channels, kept out of books from the era and generally just forgotten or unmentioned. Why? If anyone here has some thoughts or something to share, please do, I find it an interesting subject. Thank you.

Rather for fun, but I found it an interesting solution to the mission.

When I saw the mission description, it was a scenario that immediately occurred to me, and when I saw that it was possible to enter the city from the beginning, I restarted and prepared Zygimants to break through. Unexpectedly, it turned out that the monument is surrounded by a wall, when I almost gave up, I noticed that the crossbowman was standing between Zygimantus and the gate, it was my chance that I took advantage of.

From that moment on, this mission was simple, I will probably complete it normally one day, but I decided that I would share it.

https://reddit.com/link/p3xd3k/video/18tv4yh2r7h71/player

1.) This long winded, so the tl;dr is: Until KCD, I had never heard of the Hussite Wars, Defenestrations of Prague or really any history of the period outside of Columbus/Inquisition/100 Years War/Protestant Reformation/advent of gunpowder in Europe) but having been educated in the United States (Florida to boot, horrible public education) we never came close to touching on this region during this period.

2.) I resent the fact I am just now learning about the Hussite Wars, which is WAY more badass than nailing paper to a door, and personally grants a whole new perspective on the Slavic people outside of Adidas tracksuits and cigarettes (Roman “lets go bowling, cousin” Bellic comes to mind)

Kingdom Come: Deliverance’s narrative takes place against the backdrop of one of the most violent, zealous periods in European history, and while the game does a great job of introducing the major actors and events of the period (Avignon Papacy, Siege of Kuttenberg, Council of Constance, Sigusmund, Wenceslaus, etc.-historic references abound) it opened a lot of doors about the period transitioning out of the ecclesiastically dominated Middle Ages and into the humanist Renaissance. I enjoy European history in general and with 100+ hours logged, KCD threw me headfirst into so much 15th century Czech, Polish, German/HRE and Hungarian history that I wanted to get a better idea of how Henry’s story was applicable in the grand scheme of things.

In short (but not really):

•Jan Hus publicly criticizes the decadence and corruption of the Roman Catholic Church (indulgences, anti-popes, Latin monopoly on religious ceremonies, etc.) and gathers a respectable following of pro-reformers in Prague, 100 years before Martin Luther.

• Sigusmund calls the Council of Constance to resolve the Schism, calls Hus to attend and stand trial a la Martin Luther’s Diet of Worms (a deliberative general assembly of sorts) ultimately taking him into custody and burning him at the stake for heresy in 1415.

• A few years later, a Hussite priest leads his congregation into the administrative district in Praugue and threw a few German administrators OUT OF A WINDOW. This is an event known as the FIRST Defenestration of Prague (there are more). The Hussite movement was naturally sub-divided between moderate and radical sects- I’m sure you can figure out yourself which group did the German-throwing.

Fun fact: so astonished from the preceding events, Wenselaus has a STROKE and kicks the bucket THA

I'm sorry for the utterly butchered title

Vlastním píšťalu na domácí obranu, přesně jak si bratr Žižka přál. Čtyři drzouni vtrhnou do baráku. „Co to k čertu?“ zařvu zatímco popadnu svoji prachem poháněnou píšťalu. Udělám do prvního muže díru o velikosti golfového míče, zdechne na místě. Pak tasím svoji hákovnici, kompletně minu protože má hladkou hlaveň a odstřelím sousedovic psa. Vyběhnu po schodech do patra kde mám nabitý kanon. „Kdož sú boží bojovníci, zmrdi!“ Kartáč roztrhá dva muže a šrapnely spustí alarm aut na ulici. Popadnu svoji hákovnici za pažbu a naběhnu na posledního drzouna. Vykrvácí během čekání na policii jelikož rozervaný krk nelze sešít, přesně jak si bratr Žižka přál.

Rules:

• Fight takes place on PUBG's Erangel island.
• All national heroes unfortunately know that their goal is to eliminate each other in a Hunger Games-esque fashion in order to win, and therefore have a mindset to kill.
• The heroes are at their physical peaks and are backed by any disputed/folklore feats (e.g. Isokelekel's god heritage, Skanderbeg's strength, everything they like to say about Kim Il-sung, etc.) as well as their real-life ones.
• Everyone starts unarmed, but can pick up melee weapons like knives, bats, swords, sticks and spears, as well as bows, crossbows, throwing knives and flintlock guns. Some can still wear any protective armour (e.g. Ned Kelly & Joan of Arc)
• This list consists of people recognised as national heroes, either politically or popularly, hence not all will be warriors and freedom fighters.
• Some unrecognized or partially-recognised states (e.g. Abkhazia, South Ossetia, Palestine, Transnistria) will appear for the sake of variety.

Competitors:

Just for fun, don't take this too seriuosly. Of course the game doesn't need this civ - but I need it. :-)

Coming from the region in southern Germany which is famous for the world's most beautiful dialect, I don't feel represented well enough by the Teutons. After splitting the Burgundians from the Franks and the Sicilians from the Italians, why not add the Swabians? And after fighting at Tannenberg as Jogaila and Jan Žižka, wouldn't Ulrich von Jungingen's perspective be the next logical step?

According to the clichés, the Swabians are known as Tüftler (inventors) and Häuslesbauer (house builders), but also for being stingy and keeping their money together. So I took the challenge to turn these clichés into a concept for a playable civ which adds some new bonuses without being OP. The strengths of the civ are buildings, advanced technology, and using their gold efficiently. A nice defensive fast-castle civ with a good monk rush for Arena clowns like me.

Civ Bonuses:

• Houses and Palisades built 80% faster
• Can construct buildings of the next age (except fortifications) while aging up
• Technologies (including age advances) cost -25% gold
• Gold miners generate additional food (similar to Polish stone miners generating gold)

Unique Techs:

• Kehrwoche: Damaged buildings regenerate
• Peasants' War: Boosts attack and HP of all trash units in the field (one-time use)

Unique Unit:

Inspired by a well-known poem by Ludwig Uhland, this is a unit which just wants to go its way in peace, but can get really aggressive when being attacked.

• Swabian Crusader: Cavalry. High HP, but slow movement and attack rate. Special ability: Returns 40% of melee damage to the attacker (e. g. a unit which deals 10 damage also takes 4 damage at the same time).

Team Bonus:

• Can upgrade palisades to Fortified Palisades by researching Fortified Wall

Tech Tree:

• All eco upgrades available
• Missing Paladin, Siege Onager, one or two archer techs, Heresy, some dock techs, all non-European units

And, of course, the most important thing: their in-game dialogue, for example:

Select:

• Ha no!
• Dô be-n-e.
• Wa witt?

Move:

• Dô nom.
• So isch nô au wieder.

Attack:

• He macha!
• Emmr feschde druff!
• Aogschbitzt en Boda nei!

Select Monk:

• Griß Gott.

Move King:

• No ned hudla.
• No nix Narrets.

Construct Building:

• Schaffa, schaffe, Heisle baua.

It's named after the [Battle of Lipany](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Lipany) that took part in Czechia and where the Hussite wars were ended. You may remember the Hussites from the Jan Žižka campaign in AoE2: Dawn of the Dukes :) The Bohemian civ didn't make it into AoE4 (although one could argue that it was part of the HRE during a large part of AoE4's time-period), but it's nice that there is at least this reference to our history (shame that the HRE didn't get a campaign).

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

https://mobile.twitter.com/boardcubator/status/1440267115492102148

The concept art looks like one of the Prague Defenestrations, probably the one from 1419. I'd say the Hussite Wars are all but confirmed as the plot of KCD 2 at this point.

Edit: Only now noticed 1421 in the image. :)

Edit 2: There's also this movie about Jan Žižka, a Czech military commander during the Hussite Wars and Czech national hero. It was delayed due to covid, but "It is the most expensive Czech film ever made" and Daniel Vávra has a cameo in it.

Although it's more wishful thinking on my part, it could also mean we get to see Prague in KCD 2. Definitely excited.

Do your worst!

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

You might say that there already is, but only one (Carmilla/Elisabeth), and none others I know of. Since I myself am Czech, I have few ideas: Jožin z Bažin (Berserker), Jan Žižka (Pretender or Rider), Jiří z Poděbrad (Ruler/Saber), Charles IV. (Also Saber/Ruler) and Otokar II (Saber)

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.