Ios App Puns

It said ‘parking fine’ so that was nice. . . .

Credit u/itshimstarwarrior

Because communication is key

Edit: it's from here, so please give the op credit

Apparently the livestock weren’t getting a well rounded diet.

... so they can beat the crowds!

Edit: Wow, this is now my second highest upvoted post ever, and it's not even my own joke! Totally should have credited the video I saw this in: https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/h8btkp/protester_has_a_joke_for_the_police_officers/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Thanks for the laughs and great comment threads, Reddit :)

I was recently at my brothers house and went into the bathroom and found this post and came out of the bathroom to my brother, his roommate and my gf (who is very tired of my antics) all sitting silently while he is playing a video game and the other two are scrolling. I recite the joke with a healthy pause before the punchline and my brother pauses his game and gets up from the couch to smoke a cigarette while I’m laughing hysterically. I then get up from the couch and follow him saying “No wait, get it, because…” and it was the hardest I’ve laughed in a very long time

A Pamiranian.

props to this post for reminding me of this joke I though up a while ago

A pic for anyone who wants to see it:

https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/lum6ev/so_if_this_is_broken_would_it_now_be_a_cant_opener/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

It’s a wife or deaf situation

Credit for idea: https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/l5550w/my_girlfriend_says_if_we_dont_get_married_soon/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

My daughter had to wire an essay about her hobby, which is softball. Her opener:

Pitcher this, you’re standing on a mound.

I was overwhelmed, and more proud than ever. She threw in some other puns too, it was an excellent essay, she’s giving me a run for my money, I batter watch out.

Edit: thank you u/PsychicGnome for the reminder that my kids are better parents than I am

Doctor: then don’t go to those places

source:

He apparently has a 3-D printer

Apparently the livestock weren’t getting enough square meals.

No sun

OC: https://www.reddit.com/r/terriblefacebookmemes/comments/p30xr5/no/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

here is my joke

“I’m boiling the hell out of it.”

(Inspired from: https://www.reddit.com/r/ContagiousLaughter/comments/ny2yh2/god_i_love_her_laugh/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf )

https://www.reddit.com/r/dadjokes/comments/ap9gqf/i_have_a_phd_in_procrastin/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app

We will never know!

riposte

Link to post

But really, the truth is that it’s all in the delivery.

She lost

plagiarism

https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/c1exo1/technically_keanu_reeves_was_correct_we_all_are/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app

Plagiarism