In Touch Puns

A list of puns related to "In Touch"

Walked past a pallet of nacho cheese at Costco today. Looked my daughter in the eye and said, “Dylan, don’t touch”

Natcho-cheese.

I try.

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👤︎ u/PMme_slave_leia_pics
📅︎ Dec 27 2020
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Which stuff should you not touch in the forest?

Witch stuff

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/like_a_wet_dog
📅︎ Dec 18 2020
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My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side

So I crashed my car

👍︎ 13
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👤︎ u/Jack-Of-All-Trades-
📅︎ Oct 26 2020
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The easiest way to get in touch with inner self...

is to buy one ply toilet paper

👍︎ 13
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👤︎ u/50ShadesOfPalmBay
📅︎ Jul 10 2020
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I got in touch with my inner self today.

That's the last time I use cheap toilet paper.

👍︎ 40
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👤︎ u/Fermentus
📅︎ Mar 14 2020
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The guy who created the sign "Caution Do Not Touch" in braille,

is an evil genius.

👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ May 31 2020
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My daughter had to stick her hand in a sack to try to guess the type of material by touch...

It was felt.

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Apr 11 2020
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I'd you ever need to get in touch with a bike company

Ask for the spokesman

👍︎ 32
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👤︎ u/GaryTheKnight
📅︎ Oct 09 2019
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"Don't touch" has to be one of the most terrifying things to read in Braille
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👤︎ u/Coleslaw840
📅︎ Nov 08 2018
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“Don’t touch the blackberry cobbler in the kitchen!”

But that little man continued to make his little stupid berry shoes.

👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/FeedbackUSA
📅︎ Nov 18 2019
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I got in touch with my inner self today

Thats the last time I'm using one ply toiletpaper

👍︎ 32
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👤︎ u/Nahanotme
📅︎ Sep 13 2019
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I needed a lawyer, so a friend referred me to his legal counsel. But I'm having a really hard time getting in touch with the guy.

A. Goodman is hard to find.

👍︎ 18
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👤︎ u/garbagearmy
📅︎ Jun 14 2018
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How do M and Ms keep in touch?

Smartiephones.

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
📅︎ Jan 26 2017
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How does He-Man stay in touch with his buddies?

He-mail

👍︎ 31
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👤︎ u/Westernshark
📅︎ Mar 30 2012
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Read this in my "speech and diction" book this morning: "Never touch a sleeping sea snake"

"You'll feel eel at ease"

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/dangerzonepatrol101
📅︎ Feb 10 2015
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My wife asked me to get in touch with my more feminine side

So I crashed the car

👍︎ 22
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👤︎ u/CoinMosquito703
📅︎ Aug 08 2020
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My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side

So I crashed the car and didn't talk to her all day for no reason.

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/Roland_248
📅︎ Aug 16 2020
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My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side

So I crashed the car

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/Moony-7
📅︎ Aug 09 2020
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I got in touch with my inner self today

That’s the last time I’m buying cheap toilet paper.

👍︎ 273
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👤︎ u/Stuttgarten
📅︎ Apr 25 2018
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I got in touch with my inner self today.

And that’s the last time I buy 1-ply toilet paper.

👍︎ 23
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👤︎ u/backrowtheater
📅︎ Jan 10 2019
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I got in touch with myself today.

That's the last time I buy single-ply toilet paper.

👍︎ 18
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👤︎ u/MelkorHimself
📅︎ Dec 06 2018
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Today I got in touch with my inner self.

That’s the last time I buy cheap toilet paper.

👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Feb 07 2018
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I got in touch with my inner self the other day

I'm never buying cheap toilet paper again.

👍︎ 24
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👤︎ u/blob6
📅︎ Aug 06 2016
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