I 40 Puns

A list of puns related to "I 40"

Turning 40 this year as an English major, I have to ask what would a semi-colonoscopy be?

I guess it would be only up to the first knuckle.

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👤︎ u/WJLindley
📅︎ Jan 15 2022
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I just turned 40 but refuse to dress like other middle age men

Tunics and leggings just don’t look good with Nike Monarchs

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👤︎ u/Past_Dragonfruit_191
📅︎ Apr 08 2022
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On Ash Wednesday I will be giving up spreadsheets for 40 days and 40 nights

It's going to be completely Excel Lent.

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👤︎ u/Twigsnapper
📅︎ Mar 02 2022
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I asked my sheepdog how many sheep we had, he said 40.

"What? We should only have 37!" I replied.

"I know" he said, "I rounded them up".

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👤︎ u/Light_bulbnz
📅︎ Feb 26 2020
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I'm a 40 year old woman who delivers babies for a living and I just bought a brand new Corvette...

Everyone thinks I'm have a Midwife crisis.

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👤︎ u/DrippyGoods
📅︎ May 20 2021
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After almost 40 years, I finally had my first date.

I prefer raisins.

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👤︎ u/Nebocsid
📅︎ Sep 28 2021
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I once read a book about WD-40.

It was in the non-friction section.

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👤︎ u/Predestinatural
📅︎ Oct 17 2020
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I just watched a documentary on the history of the WD-40.

It’s non friction.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Mar 23 2021
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I don't think women should be allowed to have kids after 40

40 kids is way too much by any standard

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👤︎ u/Opposite-Dustt
📅︎ Feb 28 2021
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Sheepdog: All 40 sheep are accounted for, boss. Farmer: But I only had 39?

Sheepdog: Yeah I know, but I rounded them up!

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👤︎ u/cotswoldboy
📅︎ Jan 06 2021
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My partner turned 40 today so I gave him some red, red wine and told him

UB40

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👤︎ u/TL4Life
📅︎ Dec 16 2020
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I sent an invitation to 40 of my German friends to come to my wedding

10 agreed to come and 39

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👤︎ u/Slymood
📅︎ Sep 26 2020
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Told my wife when she turns 40, I was gonna have to trade her in on 2, 20's

She said that I wasn't wired for it.....

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👤︎ u/Jalkl
📅︎ Sep 05 2020
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I’m reading a book about WD-40.

It’s non-friction.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Feb 22 2019
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I am a 40 years old with the body of a 20 years old.

Any idea on how to bury it?

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👤︎ u/0theoneandonly0
📅︎ Aug 01 2019
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I lost 40 kilograms in 1 week

The weightlifting club fired me soon after.

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👤︎ u/Nudnick1977
📅︎ Mar 05 2020
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I saw a Craigslist ad for a 40 inch smart TV the other day.

The guy was asking for $50 and the only thing wrong with it was the volume controls weren't working properly.

At that price, I couldn't turn it down.

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👤︎ u/Aptom_4
📅︎ Jan 23 2019
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I didn’t have much money to buy a new costume so I cut off 40% of my boobs.

Boo

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👤︎ u/Nodripxx
📅︎ Oct 23 2019
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I just finished a book on WD-40.

It’s non friction.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Sep 17 2019
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After 40 years, I met my long lost twin brother at a Gamblers Anonymous meeting last night...

What are the odds!!

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Sep 28 2017
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A farmer and his dog are herding sheep. They finish and his dog says "I counted 40 sheep". The farmer replies, "That's odd I only got 37.”

The dog replies "I rounded them up".

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👤︎ u/zortor
📅︎ Jul 28 2018
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I hate to admit, I like about 40 % of shitty_car_mods.

Am I just a normal minority?

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👤︎ u/super_witty_usernam
📅︎ Jun 13 2016
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I spent 40 minutes on hold to my urologist.

She's taking the piss.

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👤︎ u/RafflesEsq
📅︎ Oct 13 2014
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I asked my sheepdog how many sheep we had, he said 40.

"What? We should only have 37!" I replied.

"I know" he said, "I rounded them up".

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👤︎ u/Light_bulbnz
📅︎ Oct 22 2020
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I don't think women should be allowed to have kids after 40.

40 kids is way too much by any standard.

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👤︎ u/LudwigFeuerbach
📅︎ Apr 27 2020
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