To beat the crowd.
Edit: All credit goes to u/AleoMoorea, who posted it here.
Both of them have been resisting a rest.
It's about dam time!
It was a bit part.
Me: Daddy Iβm thirsty!
My dad: Hi thirsty Iβm Fridy lets go Saturdy and get a Sundy.
Iβm sure itβs not original but it makes me laugh to think of how I was making my dad insane asking for a DRIIINNNKKK and he would always come back with this.
He heard they were there to shoot a pilot
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.
Kawaii five-o
Iβll get my coat
... βSoloβ would win Hans down.
(Iβm sure thatβs been done before but itβs new to me. Sorry if thatβs the case! Meanwhile I am trying to come up with a version about who shot first - Han or Greedo - but Solo had one Han up and the other under the table, so not both Hans and not really βdownβ either. Shucks)
He was an IT professional.
I drewdrewbarrymoremoreandmore though.
You probably havenβt because it isnβt out yet.
To summarize:
He's never gonna give you Up
Never gonna lend you Down
Never gonna run around, and dessert you.
Itβs the first Indie movie.
We're currently filming the Pilate.
The trailer just dropped.
I bet Elijah wood know.
Day of the triffics
Apparently camera film is photosensitive
It's synching now
I don't have the guts to break to them that it was all for a play on words.
Thatβs a frightening statistic.
Well you should, it's Remember Antz Day
A warp party.
But Lisa Kudrow
they'll call her Raisy Didley.
Basically set decoration, we had a small crew. A lot of the actors and the rest of the crew were confused who was in charge of those items. Luckily, Jason was a reliable, honest guy. In fact, he was one of the most honest, dependable people I knew on set.
So that evening before we had dinner together, I called Jason to the center, and thanked him for the quality of work that he'd put out so far, and I said "Props to Jason."
It has the best Kongclusion.
to Hong Kong-based jewelry retailer Chu Tai Fook. Over the last few months as the protests in Hong Kong have become heated Mr. Chu has been on the side of the government which has caught the eye of the international gem dealers, causing him to become a bit of a pariah.
The diamond went up for sale his and the Chinese government wanted to ensure that world's most expensive gem got a fair price. Mr. Chu approached Southerby's who was hesitant to get involved in what could be deemed a political gem sale. Despite his protests none of the world's leading auction houses the answer was always the same, they would not do the auction. This is when president Xi Jiping got involved to ensure that some good news could come out of China.
Last week it was reported that Rick Harrison, from Pawn Stars, had approached Xi Jinping saying that he would hold the diamond but couldn't promise more than $500 USD from the sale of the pendant. This infuriated the Chinese president threatened to take down the reality TV star, but Harrison was adamant telling Mr. Pooh, "If Chu wished to pawn the star, makes no difference who you are"
Braise the Red Lanternfish
Stanley Rubric!
Many of you probably know what itβs like to have part of a joke or a punchline that you canβt seem to put together into one full working joke. Hereβs what Iβve got:
The filmβs last frame, already used, says to the camera, βCome on, take another photo, I donβt mind.β
To which the camera replies, βAre you sure? I wouldnβt want to superimpose.β
Itβs there but itβs not quite. Any help?
The work of Steven Wright, he's the famous Erudite (comic) scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."
1 Β - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2Β Β - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3Β Β - Half the people you know are below average.
4Β Β - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6 Β - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7Β Β - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 Β - If you want the rainbow, you have got to put up with the rain.
9 Β - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.
25 - If at first, you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is a place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
My four year old was watching a Disney movie while I was in the kitchen. The app we use for Disney on the tv is horribly unreliable (Disney life on amazon firestick), randomly freezing or restarting whatever we're watching.
Anyway, I'm scoffing a cake I don't want her to have when I hear a shout.
"Daddy, the film is frozen."
I go through, look at the TV and tell her "No it's not, that's Moana."
I think it's the first time she's both gotten one of my jokes and appreciated how crap it is. Her eye roll and "ugh" brought a tear to my eye.
>!At the end of the film, Tony Says "I am Ironman"!<
>!The line should have been "Hi Inevitable, I'm Dad"!<
