So my dad just said this at dinner....

Little sister: Hey dad do you want to try this amazing sundae

Dad: No thanks, I prefer Mondays

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/AYMANJOHNCHAMP
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 27 2020
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My first official dad joke!!!

So my 1st Born came into this world on Monday night and we were discharged on Thursday. Upon leaving our room, we were given a metal cart to place our belongings on including our son (in his car seat). As we made our way to the garage, I noticed that when the cart was rolling his car seat would rock a bit. I took this opportunity to exclaim โ€œhey (sonโ€™s name) youโ€™re really rockinโ€™ โ€˜nโ€™ rollinโ€™ now.โ€ My wife then truly realized what is in store for her.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 542
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/do_it-to_it
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 29 2020
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Dad hit me with another cheesy joke just now.

I'm making enchiladas for my work tomorrow but I forgot to buy baby jack cheese for my cheese enchiladas. I've been calling stores to ask them ahead if they have any, but no store in my neighborhood has it.

I told my dad about my frustrations as I was calling Food 4 Less, and my dad said, "Hey if they don't have it, tell them - tell 'em, 'Well you guys don't have JACK!'"

I then put my hands on my face began groaning as he closed out with, "I perform every Monday through Thursday!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/sinabimo
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 06 2014
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Dad-Joked playing basketball tonight

I go play Monday night's at a church league, and the whole event is organized by this guy Rob:

Rob: Hey, did you guys hear on the radio today about that celebrity who stabbed her husband?

Us: No, who was it?

Rob: Um, what was her name. Reese...

Us: Witherspoon?!

Rob: No, with her knife

Us: ....

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Mr_Pizza_Puncher
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 07 2014
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