Happy Anniversary Puns

Dad: "Keep mum."

I saw him picking up a quarter off the floor.

I said to him, "Is that where you keep all your quarters? That makes a lot of sense."

He says, "Yeah, 25 cents." then laughed for 5 minutes to himself, then kept laughing about it sporadically throughout the day.

Edit: I just wanna say thanks to my s/o /u/rainbowdongs for being so hilarious. <3 Happy anniversary! Love you!

March forth!

(And to my dad, happy anniversary of telling this joke every year of my childhood.)

Not a direct joke, but I was glad to hear on the radio the other day that the inspiration behind the invention of the sports bra was a dad joke

http://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2017/09/29/554476966/40-years-of-athletic-support-happy-anniversary-to-the-sports-bra

Yesterday was our anniversary and he was in a really bad mood since his boss changed his schedule around without any consideration to him or our family. Anyway, while he was getting out of the car I said: "Maybe it would make you feel better to tell your wife Happy Anniversary before you leave." Husband: "I'll tell you the next time I see you." He opens the back door of the car to get his stuff out, he looks at me and says "Happy Anniversary."