|cult - religion|
He pasta way. His doctor cried, "I cannoli do so much!"
Now heβs just a pizza history.
It's going to be called Post Pone Ma Loan.
(I'll see myself out).
Because of all the He He
(Chemistry joke)
Iβm trying to get a civilian job but donβt have a leg to stand on
Would you please just let everything blow over first..
Edit/update:
First let me say that we fortunately weathered the storm well, some damage, not major.
I grew up with a humorous dad, and I appreciate how humor can alleviate stress. Most of you "got it", some of you didn't, some (few) were offended.
I grew up with a dad who taught me the appreciation of MAS*H where Hawkeye Pierce made jokes and quips in a horrible environment (war).
My dad even joked when he got Covid-19, a serious issue at his age, he first told me saying "I tested positive.. I'm pregnant"
That said I want to say Thank You to those that got it.
Riding out a hurricane is a scary and anxiety ridden experience. Each time you commented you made me smile, chuckle and sometimes laugh. It brought a bright spot to an otherwise scary night, if only for a moment it would take my mind off of the raging wind and rain at my door each of the hundreds of times my phone notification went off as this post "blew" up! I can only hope it did the same for others who appreciate humor the way that my dad taught me to.
Thanks r/dadjokes
Godspeed to those still battling this storm and those that will battle the results in the days and weeks to come.
As Jimmy Buffet once said "If we couldn't laugh we'd all go insane"
They are adjusted for inflation.
β¦except for
They're always looking for people.
"Hey, what happened to that guy that was out front selling those inflatable Tyrannasaurus Rex Halloween costumes?" the guy asks the bartender. "Oh, yeah the ATF came by and picked him up," the bartender says. "Turns out he was a small arms dealer."
Iran
...oof
I knew they had security guards, but it was a whisk I was willing to take
When they grow up, 2 of them turn into adult knees.
(The ultrasound tech look like she wanted to punch me when I said that)
The barman says to the guy "That's a bit mean, why does he call you donkey?" and the man replies "It's OK, he aw ... he aw ... he always calls me donkey"
Cause traffic is a nightmare on Elm Street.
Eclipse it.
But he's right, my broth could use a celery.
and not ?
Pi-rates
Me : WHO?
He is a good friend.
Well,
Good Anuf.
The doctor asks whatβs bothering the man and he says βDoc, Iβve eaten something that disagrees with meβ Just then his stomach rumbles and says βNo you didnβtβ
"Ouch! Why do they have to leave such dangerous bars hanging everywhere, people might get hurt"
His funeral is on sundial at moon.
no, really, put it in the comments and the one with the most upvotes iβll put on a custom deck of cards im buying
would she be a x-men or transformer?
He had gnocchi.
This is known as the Dominoβs effect.
He is the Bart ender.
There's just no whey.
My dealer sure has some explaining to do.
Imagine being 73 years old and getting your first job.
Turns out there's no place like Rome for the hollandaise.
When heβs standing on the corner selling quackβ¦..π¦
Just ice!
WoW.
Shared by my 11-year-old tonight...
You divide the distance raptor by the time raptor.
