An anteater walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Can I get you a drink?" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo!" "How about something to eat?" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo!" "What about some peanuts?" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Frazzled, the bartender cries, "What's with the long no's!?"
Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face".
How do you get into an all glass China cabinet
I just went to get my glasses fixed and you’ll never guess who I ran into when I was there!
That’s right!
.... Everyone.
What do you get when an alternating current and a direct current run into each other in a wire?
A horse walks into a bar and sits at a stool near the bartender. The bartender goes "Hi Horse, what can I get for you today?"
The horse looks at the bartender and says "Hey"
Soccer coach to newbie: "Basically, you kick this ball down the field and try to get it into that big net at the end."
"That's the goal at least."
What do you call a monkey that cant get into his house?
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says “Wow, I’ve never served a weasel before. What can I get you?”
Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight, when one draws a line in the dirt and slurs, “If you cross this, I’ll hit you in the face.”
/r/Jokes/comments/jx9abu/…
What do you get if you plug your foot into the mains
If you get into a pillow fight with death...
Be prepared for the reaper cushions.
I read online that you are significantly more likely to get into an accident within 5 miles of your house.
There's a discount to get into our local aquarium, as long as you're camping, or dressed as a dolphin.
So, to all in tents and porpoises, it's free!
What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a French bathroom?
What do you call a shape that gets into a car accident?
What do you call a tropical cocktail that gets into a car accident?
Did you hear about Mcdonald's trying to get into the steakhouse market?
How do you get money into your mouth?
Did you guys see the new Adventures of Tin Tin movie? His soul gets removed from his body and put into an industrial drum fan.
I'd rate it tin out of tin. Big fan
A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich. When he receives the check, he pulls out a gun, fires it several times, then walks out the door. If you don't get it look up "panda" in the dictionary ...
"Panda: A large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China; eats shoots and leaves."
Since today Merriam Webster even has the word dad joke:
"a wholesome joke of the type said to be told by fathers with a punchline that is often an obvious or predictable pun or play on words and usually judged to be endearingly corny or unfunny"
What do you get for diving into a wave of oranges.
what do you get when you throw an eggo waffle into the california desert?
A man walks into the Drs office with a duck on his head. The doctor says "What can I do for you today?" The duck says "Doc, can you get this guy off my tail?"
What do you get if you inject human DNA into a goat?
Removed from the petting zoo.
What do you call it when two coconuts get into an accident?
What do you get when a cell splits into three?
An anteater walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Can I get you a drink?"
"Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"
"How about something to eat?"
"Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"
"What about some peanuts?"
"Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Frazzled, the bartender cries, "What's with the long no's!?"
The anteater replies, "I was born with it!"
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?
"
"Pop," goes the weasel.
Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight, when one draws a line in the dirt and slurs, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face.”
That was the punchline...
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can i get you?"
Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One draws a line in the dirt and says, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face.”
Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One draws a line in the dirt and says, "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face."
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get you?"
What do you call a pasta that can’t get into their house?
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?
"
"Pop," goes the weasel.
What do you call a monkey that cant get into his house?
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?
"
"Pop," goes the weasel.
A weasel walks into a bar, The bartender says “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel in here before, What can I get you?”
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?
"
"Pop," goes the weasel.
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?"
A weasel walks into a bar . The bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never served a weasel before. What can I get you?”
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?
"
"Pop," goes the weasel.
What do you get when you throw a hand grenade into a French bathroom?
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get you?"
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says “Wow! I’ve never served a weasel before, what can I get for you?”
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender was amazed, he said “wow I’ve never served a weasel before, what can I get you?”
What do you get when you inject human DNA into goat DNA?
Kicked out of the petting zoo :(
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