Furnas Dam Puns

As you probably know, I have wrapped up my booking series with the exception of NXT 2.0. To take a page out of u/LexingtonDeville84's booking series, I will also be posting the statistics for my booking series, with this part covering the World and Midcard titles.

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WWF/E Championship

Longest Reigns

1. Hulk Hogan: 669 days (02/07/1986-02/05/1988)
2. Hulk Hogan: 558 days (01/23/1984-08/03/1985)
3. CM Punk: 469 days (07/17/2011-10/28/2012)
4. Drew McIntyre: 301 days (04/05/2020-01/31/2021)
5. Stone Cold Steve Austin: 286 days (02/25/2001-12/09/2001)

Most Reigns

1. John Cena: 9 reigns
2. Hulk Hogan & The Rock: 7 reigns
3. Stone Cold Steve Austin & Triple H: 6 reigns
4. Randy Orton & Brock Lesnar: 5 reigns
5. Bret Hart: 4 reigns

Random Facts

1. There were 5 vacancies (6 if you count Rey Mysterio (and later Alberto Del Rio) becoming co-WWE Champion with CM Punk)
2. The 1st and 10th champion was Hulk Hogan, the 25th champion was Razor Ramon, the 50th champion was Kurt Angle, the 75th champion was Umaga, the 100th champion was John Cena, and the current champion is Karrion Kross
3. There were 125 champions in total
4. The longest reign of the 80s was Hulk Hogan's 669 day reign, the longest reign of the 90s was Bret Hart's 278 day reign, the longest reign of the 2000s was Stone Cold Steve Austin's 286 day reign, the longest reign of the 2010s was CM Punk's 469 day reign, and the longest reign of the 2020s was Drew McIntyre's 301 day reign

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World Heavyweight Championship

Longest Reigns

1. Roman Reigns: 589+ days (08/23/2020-present day)
2. Brock Lesnar: 343 days (04/30/2017-04/08/2018)
3. Randy Orton: 315 days (08/15/2004-06/26/2005)
4. Shinsuke Nakamura: 237 days (08/11/2019-04/04/2020)
5. Bobby Lashley: 231 days (08/19/2018-04/07/2019)

Most Reigns

1. Edge: 8 reigns
2. Triple H, Batista, & Chris Jericho: 4 reigns
3. Kane, The Undertaker, CM Punk, & John Cena: 3 reigns

Random Facts

1. there were 3 vacanci

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

You take away their little brooms

There hasn't been a post all year!

It was about a weak back.

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)

Bob

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

But nobody ever mentions his sister, Onya, who invented the starter pistol.

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

As thanks to everyone for sticking with me throughout the last nine months, I've decided to split the stats up into two parts, with the first part being the World and Midcard Titles while the second part will be the Tag Team and Women's Titles, so the post doesn't get too long. This part will also have the list of Undertaker's victims at WrestleMania, as well as all sole survivors at Survivor Series, so without further adieu, here it is!

WWF/WWE Championship:

Longest Reigns:

1) CM Punk: 630 days (17/7/2011 - 6/4/2013)

2) Hulk Hogan: 573 days (1/1/1985 - 27/7/1986)

3) AJ Styles: 392 days (19/11/2017 - 15/12/2018)

4) Randy Savage: 371 days (27/3/1988 - 1/4/1989)

5) Hulk Hogan: 370 days (21/11/1986 - 25/11/1987)

Most Reigns:

1) John Cena: 11 reigns

2) Brock Lesnar: 7 reigns

3) Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Rock, & Randy Orton: 6 reigns

4) Hulk Hogan & Bret Hart: 5 reigns

5) The Undertaker, Triple H, & Kurt Angle: 4 reigns

Random Facts:

1) The title was vacated five times.

2) There were 105 championship reigns in total.

3) The first champion was Hulk Hogan, the tenth champion was Ric Flair, the twenty-fifth champion was Kane, the fiftieth champion was Eddie Guerrero, the seventy-fifth champion was CM Punk, and the one-hundreth champion was Andrade "Cien" Almas.

4) The longest reign of the 80’s was Hulk Hogan’s 573 day reign, the longest reign of the 90’s was The Ultimate Warrior’s 357 day reign, the longest reign of the 00’s was John Cena’s 280 day reign, the longest reign of the 10’s was CM Punk’s 630 day reign, and the longest reign of the 20’s was Drew McIntyre’s 301 day reign.

World Heavyweight Championship:

Longest Reigns:

1) Roman Reigns: 589+ days (23/8/2020 - current)

2) Shinsuke Nakamura: 237 days (11/8/2019 - 3/4/2020)

3) Braun Strowman: 231 days (20/8/2017 - 7/4/2018)

4) Sheamus: 210 days (1/4/2012 - 27/10/2012)

5) Batista & Kevin Owens: 189 days: Batista: (3/4/2005 - 8/10/2005) Owens: (25/9/2016 - 2/4/2017)

Most Reigns:

1) Edge: 7 reigns

2) Triple H: 5 reigns

3) Chris Jericho: 4 reigns

4) The Undertaker, CM Punk, John Cena, Randy Orton, & Batista: 3 reigns

Random Facts:

1) The title was vacated twice.