So I was being pathetic tonight and googling different things about sun signs.
I started reading this and immediately cracking up. I hope someone else finds this Virgo description just as hilarious. It's so ridiculous it had me rollinnnn.
Here it is:
Go & search the web& u will find the reality of virgo creatures and the heart aching stories of their innocent victims.
WARNING READ THIS CAREFULLY. VIRGO=Ruled by mercury=DUALITY=MUTABLE(Virgin with wings)
VIRGO REALITY VIRGOS ARE-FAKE,PRETENDS 2bE DOWN to EARTH and Humble(BUT THEY R NOT), DUAL,CHANGEABLE,IMAGE Conscious,COLD HEARTED, PLAYERS,USERS,HYPOCRITES,CLOSET PERVERTS, FLAKY,SHALLOW,COLD BLOODED,NARCISSISTS, SNOBS,secret psychopaths,CRITICAL,CONTROLLING,Racist, HAVE NO GENUINE FEELINGS FOR OTHERS BUT THEMSELVES, SELFISH,SELFABSORBED, indecisive(throughout their life) DEVOID OF EMPATHY &EMOTIONS,UNKIND,SHAMELESS, DOUBLE-FACED,MEAN,manipulative,always depressed, deceitful-liars,plays the victim,have OCD, PLAYS MIND GAMES,sexually frigid,Escapists, emotionally rigid and retarded,narrow minded, blow hot and cold,have very high standards for themselves, HAVE DISAPPEARING AND FLUCTUATING PROBLEMS, lacks sensitivity for others,lacks sexual skills, devoid of affection,spineless,NEGATIVE, cowards,SECRETIVE,HAVE MAJOR TRUST ISSUES, BLAMES OTHERS FOR THEIR FAULTS ALWAYS. TEHY ALWAYS SAY WHAT OTHERS LOVE TO HEAR(they r pple pleasers)
VIRGO- If u're looking for a man that no other woman will ever want to steal,u"ve finally found him.Ever wondered what goes on in the mind of a serial killer? Find out what Interpol has been trying to discover for years and date a Virgo.If u are currently in love with a Virgo and you don't want to believe the truth,pick up any detective novel that features an ice-pick-wielding nutter and then try telling us he doesn't remind u of someone you know and it's all just a bunch of coincidences.If he looks vaguely familiar, that's because he is.u probably saw an artist's sketchy impression on Crimewatch the night before and faintly remember words like 'bludgeoned','manhunt'and 'Virgo'. Virgo - The Censor When Virgo falls in love it is purely for sex.The lover must be able to satisfy Virgo's considerable sexual needs.Each new image arouses sexual desire,but so long as u can remain sexually attractive to Virgo,u will retain his love.The slower u r in yielding ur gifts,the longer u can keep the affair alive.Nothing is more unattractive to hi
... keep reading on reddit ➡So, I went off the deep end last night. In a true blending of my passions of snarking and procrastination I decided to examine the zodiac charts of the Duggar brood. The fundies are terrified of anything that's not in the bible (or told to them that it's in the bible from a geriatric white man), so astrology is very against their whole brand of Handmaiden Lite that is IBLP. So let's see what the stars say about A Series of Unfortunate J names.
As a disclaimer, everything I learned about the horoscopes came from Tiktok and a lady at a crystal shop who talked my ear off when I bought a necklace last fall. Also this is just for funsies, the zodiac shouldn’t be used as an excuse for them to be trash people. All of the birthdays and other info came from Fundies Wiki and astro-charts provided me with their charts. Because of how freaking massive this brood is I’m going to start with Boob, Meech and the 6 oldest.
Some fast facts about Astrology: Sun= The self you identify with, Moon= emotions, Mercury= communications, Venus= love & sex life, Mars= anger. There’s also Rising which is how you first display yourself in public, a major part of the big 6 but you need an exact time of birth because it changes every two hours so I’m not going to guess with any of them. There’s 4 elements- Water, Earth, Air and Fire. Water and Earth are most compatible/ Air and Fire most compatible. There’s also 3 different qualities: Fixed, Mutable and Cardinal.
Let’s start with the trainwrecks-in-chief, Boob and Meech. Boob (7/18/65) is a Cancer Sun with a Pisces Moon. Water signs tend to value emotions and know how to work them. His mercury and venus are both in Leo, so he’s an attention whore (no surprises) and his Mars is Libra. Meech’s Sun, Moon, Mercury and Venus are Virgo, which holy space balls that's toxic (SHE HAS 6 PLACEMENTS IN VIRGO like damn stay away from me). Her Venus like Boob’s is also in Leo, I really don’t want to go in depth too much on in (my stomach probs won’t handle it) but Venus is the ruler of love/ sex and Leo’s love to be in the spotlight so it explains 19 kids. Overall compatibility is decent, He’s a water sun and moon, she’s an earth sun and moon, though his Leo mercury placement probably talks over her a lot (though this could also be he’s just a misogynist man living in a fundie world).
Pest (3/3/1988) is a Pisces Sun and Virgo Moon- two placements that are in his parent’s big 3. From what I gathered in r/astrology and TikTok Virgo moons *can
... keep reading on reddit ➡
[MILD SPOILERS FOR ENDLESS SUMMER AHEAD]
-
Hello!
For a few months now, I've noticed so many different characters across different books sharing similar personality traits, so being the typology freak that I am, I started delving more into MBTI, astrology, Enneagram types, etc., to find a a way to connect these characters and "group" them based on personality. However, there was a categorization system that stood out the most for me: The Hadean Zodiac.
[ES SPOILERS START HERE] In case you need me to freshen your memory: The Hadean Zodiac is the made up zodiac system used in the Endless Summer series, based on the 12 constellations that were observable in the sky during The Hadean (a geological period in Earth's history). These 12 constellations have animal names and are each represented by the main characters of ES.
My "theory" suggests that, all characters in Choices can be sorted into one of 11 zodiac signs (the 12th sign, Andromeda, won't be included as it is MC's zodiac sign), assuming that the signs follow the personality traits of the ES crew.
A few things before I begin:
- The examples I will be offering are not the only characters that fit their respective group (obviously), but they're instead characters from books I have read. If a character from a book you like (Example: Bloodbound, Distant Shores) is never mentioned, is because I haven't read that book - but feel free to bring up some honorable mentions!
- For customizable characters in the examples, I'm using the version of that character I play with.
- Even though a majority of these groups may look gender-based, gender isn't necessarily a factor in any of them - although PB does tend to reserve similar personality traits for characters of the same gender (Example: sarcastic characters tend to be male).
- Please excuse any mistakes - English isn't my first language!
- Do take the parallels I made at the end of each paragraph to our modern day zodiac signs with a grain of salt. I don't know that much about astrology.
-
CANIS : The Dog
Based on Diego's personality, characters under this sign are friendly, conflicted, caring and kind. They're usually LIs or very close friends with MC. If they are LIs, they tend to be rather "dull", or don't particularly stand out. They don't tend to be the primary LI option for players. This sign is a parallel to Taurus.
[Diego (ES), Griffin (TE), Thomas (MOTY), Caleb (HSS), Adam (AME)](htt
... keep reading on reddit ➡I’m like a plus size 5ft tall female version of Marc Maron, (I may complain a lot, and sometimes you’ll have to convince me to go out and have fun, but I’m funny as hell, and it’s endearing) ,
Right now I work for a pet tag company. Just answering emails all day, besides that I’m a fiber artist (I crochet, no, not exactly like your grandma)
I love animals, I have 3 dogs and 5 cats (I’ve even been known to help out an orphaned opossum and get him to the best care possible)
And for those who believe in this sorta stuff 🌞Taurus 🌝 Gemini ⬆️ Virgo Myers-Briggs: INFJ Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw 🦅
Please respond with photo here’s me! me
Alpha fleet was in pursuit. Hansen had dispatched the long range scouts on the heading the aliens had used to escape the Virgo system with the orders to drop out of hyperspace at certain intervals.
Each interval left a scout to run scans and wait for the fleet to arrive, passing on any data collected to the joined computational capacity of the fleet.
At the third interval the comms operator pinged an incoming call, addressed to the Commodore.
Hansen received the call on the main screen of the bridge.
“Commodore,” Erland faded into view on the screen, “I have to insist, on behalf of the senior captains of Alpha fleet, that you overrule the Admiral and assume command of the fleet.”
Hansen signalled the comms operator. “Transfer the call to the ready room and mark it as Classified, level three.”
Hansen knew that level three classification meant all that had heard the opening of the call would be under strict orders to forget what they had heard or face a firing squad for espionage. Judging by the bridge crew’s immediate preoccupation with normally mundane tasks, so did everyone else.
He headed out of the bridge and down the central corridor. The permanent marker army was losing the fight against the cleaning drone. The front was now made up of the barrel carts. He realised that the drone had taken its directive as literal as possible. The white paint had been sanded off, leaving the corrosive etchings of the army as faint traces in the, now exposed, steel wall.
The ghosts of the fallen were still marching.
On the opposite side of the drone dock, the majority of the army’s officers were standing, with no weapons raised and not a single fallen amongst them.
The general of the marker army was still leading his remaining forces in an assault doomed to fail.
Hansen walked past the battlefield and headed into the ready room. Two security officers, who looked like very identical twins, stood at the doorway and Derrish was having a dry-swimming session on the conference table.
The Admiral was
... keep reading on reddit ➡I find it funny how hardcore astrology people always preach anti-racism and anti-sexism and everything that ends on ism. But then they will refuse to date William because William is a virgo, like you're literally doing the same as racists, sexists and every possible ists. Don't they see themselves that it's contradictary?
Feel free to counter or prove my statement please
Hansen could feel the tension on the bridge of the Tricard as the fleet concluded the final jump. The sense of relief that washed over him as the fleet sensors immediately updated with data from the last scout ship told him that it was still in one piece and in the system.
Derrish was sitting in a high-chair behind the command console. The chair was a wooden construct that could be folded down to be a floor level seat with a front attached desk that bore a faint resemblance to a car. It had been added to the bridge of the Tricard when the Admiral had instigated a one man protest against the mess halls, seemingly unfair, regulation that stated that ‘pants are mandatory.’
Privately, Hansen suspected that the Admiral’s tendency to involuntarily share his food with half the mess hall didn’t help.
The Camp boss had banned the Admiral from the premise and subsequently, Derrish’s high chair and personal cutlery, a fork where the tines had been blunted with a cork stopper and a spoon where the edge was rubber coated, had been relocated to the bridge.
Currently the Admiral was using his pea-mash to fingerpaint on the chest of his uniform.
“Sensor sweep on the main projector.” Hansen ordered.
“No sweep!” The admiral interjected, “I’m a big boy.”
Hansen sighed and walked over to the sensor operator’s console. “Show me.” He said with a low voice.
“I like balloons because balloons make funny sounds when you touch them with your butt.” Derrish was trying to get a scoop of unmashed peas onto his blunted fork.
Several of the bridge crew shot quick, stolen glances of concern towards the admiral as he dropped the fork and grabbed a handful of pea mash and then proceeded to jam the mashed, green sludge into his mouth with a clenched fist.
“Huh?” The bemused expression that came from the admiral took Hansen by surprise. He turned his head and saw that Derrish had managed to cram his entire fist into his mouth, where it seemingly was stuck.
Shrugging off the admiral’s preoccupation, Hansen returned to focus on
... keep reading on reddit ➡Aries : A big hug, doing sports together and get into competition against each other or play some fighting video games together. The loser got to prepare a sweet and hot chocolate for both. Then have a pillow battle and tickle each other to death!!
Taurus: A warm embrace, give you sweet flowers and cook a delicious meal for you. Make your stomach wet with a big banquet. I want to chill and sleep together, cuddle each other and scrolling our social medias.
Gemini : I want to take you to an amusement park, talk all the day even if my head is going to explode. Hold your hands, make a lot of jokes. Then hugs you firmly and tell you you are the best friend I've ever had in my life.
Cancer : We'll go to the cinema together, let's me rest my head on your chest and we'll have popcorn together. When i'm scared, i want to hold you and hug you so firmly so you can never be appart from me.
Leo : I would compliment you about all your flaws. I love your arrogance, your self confidence, you are god/goddesses and you are so inspiring and funny. I want to hug you firmly, and have a lot of fun, want you to make me discover the places you like the most.
Virgo: I would like to hug you so hard, make you laugh so you can stop being flap joy. Would like to go to a museum or an art gallery with you. Tell you i love you and I'm glad for everything you've done for me.
Libra : I would tell you i'm amazed by your life philosophy, i love you, i want to hug you and i want to learn your social skills because i'm so jealous. I want to trow a big party with you in my house.
Scorpio : Stop being afraid of everything, opens up a little bit. Let's me hug you, stop being moody and depressive little scorpio. I'll be your little light <3 Igniting your darkness.
Sagittarius: You are crazy and hot, i would like to follow you everywhere on adventures. I love your life philosophy. You got so much joy into you, it's amazing and refreshing.
Capricorn : You are the best business partner i could ever dream off. What would I do without you honestly. I'm so glad I've meet you, you are so loyal, practical and smart. You are a little bit annoying sometimes but i love you. Pls let me hug you <333.
Aquarius : I like your philosophy but i would not follow it entirely. I wish i could learn more about you because you are so mysterious.
Pisces: I want to take care of you, hug you, kiss you, put a blanket on you when
... keep reading on reddit ➡I'll try to give as much context as I can here to get the full picture.
He (M31) comes from a family that is half British, very cold, and not very nice to each other (but they call it humor and I know this can be a British thing - aka banter). His family does have a history of anger (not the “normal” kind, but the abusive/toxic/throwing things at each other kind). They are very independent, don't communicate often, and just kind of let each other do their own thing.
I (F32) come from an incredibly loving, healthy, supportive family that communicates well, shares our feelings, and has constructive disagreements that almost always end in some type of healthy compromise. I feel extremely lucky to have come from this type of family. This is the type of family dynamic I'm used to, so it's been an adjustment for me to assimilate to his family - but I really try! For me personally, I do tend to be very sensitive and don't take jokes well that are personal jabs at another person - I just don't, nor have I ever, thought it was funny to say something mean or make fun of something someone can't help (for example, someone's acne, their bigger nose, their heritage, their feelings, etc.) But I try to always think about that when they or he says something that's hurtful to me ("they are just joking").
My husband and I have had a lot of ups and downs - as every couple has. We've done a lot of work to try to be better together. My biggest moment of heartbreak, though, came when he said he wanted to leave me after only 6 months of marriage (together for 6 years) for a much younger coworker. He realized later that he didn’t actually love the coworker, and wanted to stay with me but that I was the one who needed to work on how much I told him I loved him because “that’s why he fell in love with her” — apparently she told him he was her superhero often. She also started harassing and stalking me and made me feel very uncomfortable - to which he said "I just needed to ignore it" so it felt dismissive.
In addition to that experience and on a much more regular basis, my husband often makes very, very hurtful jabs at me but always says he’s joking, then apologizes after he sees how it makes me feel. He also has broken his arm 3 times punching a wall during an argument we’ve had. Again, I tell him I will help him become a better man, he apologizes, and it’s better for a little while. He has also had these outbursts, then either cries or kind of sulks so then I feel very
... keep reading on reddit ➡
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
I would have a daughter
Thought this would be a fun game for us fragrance lovers to do to pass time! Match up what fragrance you think best suits each sign, and let us know if you think the perfume you matched for your sign is compatible with your nose buds! So put your thinking caps on and LETS GO! 😁
Aries: willful, feisty, self-centered, courageous, bold, foolhardy, independent and straightforward.
Taurus: practical, creative, loyal, possessive, temperamental, sensually indulgent, down-to-earth, dependable, persistent and practical.
Gemini: curious, elusive, unpredictable, changeable, versatile, childlike, romantic, playful, friendly, talkative and have a keen intellect.
Cancer: cautious, protective, nurturing, secretive, instinctive, needy, sensitive, funny, empathetic and deeply complex.
Leo: distinctive, provocative, demanding, goal-oriented, flamboyant, self-made, warm, outgoing, sincere and loyal.
Virgo: discriminating, obsessive, realistic, analytical, reliable, self-contained, knowledgeable, predictable, obsessive, discriminating, street-smart, detailed and modest.
Libra: harmonious, civilized, intellectual, sophisticated, seductive, elegant, creative, witty, balanced, sociable and people who maintain their status quo.
Scorpio: intense, magnetic, erotic, challenging, secretive, powerful, broody, passionate, immovable and penetrating.
Sagittarius: adventurous, hilarious, extrovert, romantics, spirited, unstoppable, generous, happy and open-minded.
Capricorn: organized, respectful, devoted, classy, materialistic, serious, staid, ambitious and practical.
Aquarius: original, unique, weird, idealistic, rebellious, independent, inventors, open minded and honest.
Pisces: dreamy, erratic, creative, romantic, compassionate, elusive, imaginative, sensitive and kind people.
Capital of Ireland
It's Dublin everyday
http://m.imgur.com/ImM3RWz
But Bill kept the Windows
True story; it even happened last night. My 5-year-old son walks up behind me and out of the blue says, "hey."
I turn to him and say, "yeah, kiddo? What's up?"
He responds, "it's dead grass."
I'm really confused and trying to figure out what's wrong and what he wants from me. "What? There's dead grass? What's wrong with that?"
.
.
.
He says, totally straight-faced, "hay is dead grass," and runs off.
You officially hit rock bottom
And then you will all be sorry.
[INTRODUCTION]
in this theory, i will explain all the truths and secrets of human's birth date, and its effects on their mind, thoughts, and their entire life behaviours, goals, desires...etc.
But before we begin.... i want everyone to fully relax and open their mind completely to me. if you didn't read my previous "numbers" theory [Philosophy #001], please go and read it first.
now--- i want your biggest level of clarity turned on, and please read everything gently and slowly.
so as a start, there two main numbers here that is used as BASE for this theory, and almost everything else in the universe, which are : 3 & 4 .... now everyone would be asking "Why" those two numbers are so special. well, here are the reasons :
- as i stated in my NUMBERS THEORY in the previous post, the number "3" is the sign of "confirming/finishing/starting" of any/all concept. and this -for example- is why the "Count" usually is formed on "three" levels. the human brain just unconsciously FELT it over time, and it became common in many things in life as a result.
- as i also stated in my theory that number "4" is the sign of "Stability & Balance", hence as an example... you can find the music rhythm to be most stable at "4" beats/steps... otherwise it never gets complete.... or think about the rule of "4 walls" in houses and homes.
*as an example..... there is a question i often get from people : "why is there no 4D or 5D just like there is 2D & 3D?"
.... the answer is because 3D is already the "maximum" from the "VIEW" side of things.
3D = 3 dimensions and 4 sides reflecting from it [up,down,left,right], which makes the "7".
its worth noting that its a fact that "3 & 4" used in so many things in the universe-- because they are the "babies" that makes the "7" which is what our universe is designed from and based on.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
______[CORE THEORY 1]______
**THE
... keep reading on reddit ➡Now it’s syncing.
Aries: super naturally funny, works hard, can get the job done, blunt, educated, can get easily bothered Taurus: Don’t know any Gemini: Don’t know any Cancer: provider, needs a lot of attention, can be manipulative, caring, has a lot of emotional voids they try to fill with external matters, vengeful, emotional, has a lot of hidden parts of self, homebody Virgo: analytical, intelligent, decisive, helpful, deep thinkers, reserved, picky Libra: tells people what they want to hear, isn’t completely honest, thinks love & romance is the ultimate dream for life, skeptical, a bit overbearing Scorpio: mysterious, intense energy, skeptical, intelligent, sexy, has two different sides, denying that things aren’t good, did I mention sexy? 🤤😈 Sagittarius: talks too fucking much but that’s alright, blunt as fuck, jokes around all the time, distracted, always has crackhead energy, spontaneous, doesn’t desire being tied down, solid Capricorn: doesn’t publically show emotions, put together, doesn’t deal with others emotions the best, knows what they want, has big goals and knows how they’ll get their, intelligent, doesn’t like the bullshit, won’t deal with unnecessary things Aquarius: Don’t know any Pisces: big heart, hilarious, easy to love, uncertain, retreats from society, feels things very deeply, thinks a lot, need someone who will genuinely love them, overall very amazing sweethearts
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
I will find you. You have my Word.
She said how do you know he was headed to work?
Now all signs are somewhat funny and have a different way they go about humour but what sign do you think is the funniest? I honestly think scorpio humour is extremely underrated it is so weird but funny
Gemini, virgo and sagittarius are also pretty funny too I think
edit: And aries .!.!!!!
“thank you for your cervix.”
...sails are going through the roof.
hello Reddit!
given that Tinder has failed me, my snapchat groups have died, and discord wasn't exactly my vibe, i've resorted to yet another low for making new friends (: if you're a little lonely or just looking for someone to do spontaneous/last-minute activities with, hit me up! here's some more information about me, in case you were curious.
my name is makina, i'm 18, and i’m a social work major pursuing a law degree (:
i am a grade A dumbass. i'm kind of funny though I guess? anyway, grade A means top quality. i consider myself top quality because i have just enough personality to be a lil wild without being overwhelming. i'm pretty outgoing but i do enjoy a good night in too
let's be honest here. i look a little bit like humpty dumpty, and that's okay. my ravishing good looks will grow on you the longer you’re in my presence. don't let my pictures fool you, i'm a catfish. i'm also pretty tall, like 5'7-5'8.
I like a lot of things. i love to go out. i didn't get to do it much in high school, so having someone to show me the ropes and have fun with is really nice. i also enjoy a night in. generally, if i'm with another person i'll be having a good time.
i jive with adventurous people. ideally, friend candidates would be someone who's idea of fun is similar to mine. Spontaneous adventures, swimming, exploring new places, running around at odd hours of the night… i’m really game for anything. my taste in music is all over the place. i have pretty consistent favorites, though. i like throwback rap/r&b, old emo music, and a nice amount of alternative. just ask for my playlist if you want more info
i love lobsters, they're my favorite animal. i enjoy horoscopes and astrology. i love to swim, and do so frequently. my favorite colors are blue and yellow. i love to cook and bake and i'm pretty good at both. i get very excited about boujee grocery stores. i love vintage things, flowers, and fancy stationery. i also like to write occasionally.
there are not a lot of things i dislike, but the things i do are VERY strong dislikes. i do not like arrogant people or know it alls. otherwise, i'm very easygoing and i put up with a lot, so you should be fine. physically, i don't like weird textures. cotton balls and mud are good examples. also i hate Donald Duck with a burning passion and this is not negotiable
here is some general info and contact information
i am a Virgo.
i currently reside in jwest (:
📸- u/xvii.makina
👻-bredbinurie
🐦-@ma
... keep reading on reddit ➡Made me smile
Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...
This isn't about religion or atheism but something i wanted to talk about for a long time
I find it funny how hardcore astrology people always preach anti-racism and anti-sexism and everything that ends on ism. But then they will refuse to date William because William is a virgo, like you're literally doing the same as racists, sexists and every possible ists. Don't they see themselves that it's contradictary?
