My wife always says the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach…

Lovely woman.

Useless surgeon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2017
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My son was hit by a car today!

Relax, it was only a hot wheels!

Back story: So my one son threw a hot wheels car at my other son and left a pretty good gash on his face. This wouldn't have been a big issue except we had a family gathering to go to. People were a little surprised about how calm I was when they asked what happened and all I said was "he got hit by a car" like it has happened a bunch of times.

Not sure if it really belongs here but it was pretty funny to see people's reactions.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chillfactor343
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2017
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