Hey,
So my best mate is getting married and he's asked me to be his best man. Im really bad at being funny. I'm looking for a cheesy joke to crack about him being a chiropractor and helping people with back problems.
I feel there must be lots but I don't know any
I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?
Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
and http://imgur.com/a/o5Qcanq
Not to mention, during the interview, he got pretty serious / emotional about the fact that he had been struggling with infertility. And he was happy to have finally been fertile, cured by treatment of his variocele by his DO Urologist. And he paid them back by..taking a dump on their degree on national television and Youtube in front of tens of millions of people. He said "My [Urologist], he couldn't even afford the good letters!" Yeah, he switched from being heartfelt about being treated by his DO to equating them to off-brand Cola. He prefaced the entire dialogue by saying "There is an ongoing war in the medical community," over prestige and stuff, implying DOs are faking it to try and blend in. No the hell there's not, what's with nonmedical people trying to start shit where there isn't any?
In the interview, did he seriously make the argument that DO school is somewhere you go if you "drop out of a Caribbean MD?" As if DO is not only a backup to dropping out, but even less of an option prior to the Caribbean? This is supposed to be the guy who brags about doing his 'due diligence' for every joke, right? Does he even know that pretty much 99999% of CMDs don't even make it past first year because many are moneyfarms that don't require an MCAT (or bachelor's) to attend?
Maybe I'm just a little extra angry because I still haven't gone to bed yet and it's 7am, but..
#Holy shit, man.
I'm just peeved. I'm tired. I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of the lack of overall awareness on how medical education works - many could make the argument that none of us know how a lot of other graduate programs work, but AT THE VERY LEAST, the TWO (not just one) board-licensed physician practicing degrees in the US should be given recognition. Having to defend my education to virtually every person I meet? Like, seriously. I'm only an M1, but I don't study a billion vitamins and steps of collagen synthesis just to be called a Chiropractor, RC Cola, or anything else but a 'doctor.'
Mid-level vs physician confusion is so rampant that I've had dialogue with people like: "Oh, where are you going? Oh, DO? Osteo? Is that Bone? Oh, Chiro, huh? So would you rather go to DO school, or wait until you can go to medical school?" Or even, ***"Oh, sick! You're going to med
... keep reading on reddit ➡They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
And now I’m cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
But that’s comparing apples to oranges
And boy are my arms legs.
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
They’re on standbi
A play on words.
Put it on my bill
Calcium, nickel, neon
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
Or would that be too forward thinking?
At work, I have a workstation.
edit: cheers u/cheer_up_richard
