Om nom nom puns - They're delicious!

Om nom nom puns - They're delicious!

What do you...

  • ...call a cook-book? Omnomnibus
  • ...say after dinner? Omnomcomplete
  • ...if you're still hungry? Omnommorenomming
  • ...call a hungry, sleepy person? Insomnomnomniac
  • ...call a hungry god? Omnomnimpotent
  • ...call a food-related sign? An omnom omen
  • ...call our species? Omnomnivores
  • ...call a delicious fried egg? Omnomelet

Can you (b)eat them?

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/Nimja_
📅︎ Sep 09 2015
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everything is closed on thanksgiving!

First off, I'm new here. I've only been a dad for a few years but, I'm not sure i'll ever be able to top this and the circumstances of the set up were so chance and specific, I will never be able to use this again. This is what inspired me to seek you out and tell my story.

So, like most thanksgivings, we went to a relatives house and had very large but unusually early dinner. We went home and by nine or ten o'clock we had the little one off to sleep and my wife and I were getting hungry and wanted something simple. She asked for fast food and I was willing to oblige.

I drove to Taco Bell and it was closed. I called my wife, "sorry Taco Bell is closed. What do you want from BK?". I then drove to BK and discovered it was also closed. Called the wife "Sorry honey, BK is closed. What do you want from McDonald's?". You might see were this is going and, if you haven't already guessed it, Micky D's was closed too."Ok, I'm just going to the gas station. What do you want?" She asked for cheddar fries and I was willing to oblige. Got in side, no cheddar fries! I grab her funyuns. She like funyuns, it will be fine. As a joke (not the one we are leading up to) I called her on my way home and told her the gas station was closed too.

I got home, told her the truth about the gas station and gave her the back up back up back up back up back up plan bag of funyuns. She joked around about the number of times I had failed her in one outing (keep in mind, I had been giving her a hard time through this whole event) and then asked me for a soda from the fridge. So is This when the magic happened. I was opening the fridge when the gravity of the situation and what was at stake here suddenly struck me. I closed the fridge, got out a glass and filled it with water. I brought it back to her in the living room. She says "why did you bring me water?"

THE FRIDGE WAS CLOSED!

👍︎ 16
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📅︎ Dec 08 2015
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On Dance Clubs.

I was working in the design studio with a bunch of other students. It's late and everyone is exhausted. A couple of the girls from my class start dancing and coming up with "new moves". Eventually they started giving their moves breakfast related names.

Girl 1: This is the scrambled eggs

Girl 2: And this one is called frying bacon.

Me: Wait, wait, wait... Can we open a bar and call it... The Breakfast Club?

👍︎ 4
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📅︎ Apr 01 2015
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Family vacation

My family was visiting relatives in Seattle and we were visiting the space needle. The person at the counter offers my dad a combo with some other attraction and he responds with

"Does this combo come with fries?"

👍︎ 2
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📅︎ Jan 16 2014
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