Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover?
Because you shouldn't press your luck!
๐︎ 9k
๐
︎ Mar 17 2021
TIL: Humans are born with four kidneys
When they grow up, two of them becomes adult knees
๐︎ 1k
๐
︎ Jan 26 2021
Which rock group has four members and doesn't sing?
๐︎ 180
๐
︎ Mar 03 2021
I said I was sad to have to go back to work on Monday after a long break. My four year old without missing a beat said...
Daddy, you're sad because it's SADurday.
I was so proud.
๐︎ 584
๐
︎ Jan 02 2021
I saw a picture of a dog that had four prosthetic legs.
๐︎ 7
๐
︎ Mar 19 2021
Why did the clock go back four seconds?
๐︎ 44
๐
︎ Feb 23 2021
What do you get when you cross poison ivy and a four leaf clover?
A rash of good luck! ๐
๐︎ 8
๐
︎ Mar 14 2021
The Texas state Aquarium taught a crow to play connect four, too bad they didn't teach it Clue...
I bet it would murder the game.
๐︎ 2
๐
︎ Mar 17 2021
Three guys are on a boat with four cigarettes but no matches or lighter. What do they do?
They throw a cigarette overboard and the boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
๐︎ 33
๐
︎ Feb 22 2021
In Ancient Rome, there were four types of poisons. Poisons I, II, and III would kill you instantly.
Poison IV would just make you kinda itchy
๐︎ 57
๐
︎ Feb 07 2021
"Length times width times height. Pi times r-squared times h. Four-thirds times pi times r-cubed."
This really speaks volumes.
๐︎ 25
๐
︎ Feb 08 2021
What has four letters?
Thatโs all. I was just letting you know.
๐︎ 67
๐
︎ Dec 15 2020
Every summer I get bit by one thousand and twenty four bugs.
My wife told me to get over it cause it was just one byte.
๐︎ 23
๐
︎ Jan 02 2021
Four Taurus
๐︎ 7
๐
︎ Dec 27 2020
What has four eyes and a peepee?
>!Mississippi.!<
This joke doesn't work as well in writing.
๐︎ 11
๐
︎ Jan 23 2021
What four elements are you not allowed to bring to your job?
Nitrogen, sulfur, Fluorine, and tungsten, cause they are NSFW.
๐︎ 130
๐
︎ Nov 19 2020
What do you call four bullfighters standing in quicksand?
๐︎ 31
๐
︎ Jan 13 2021
What do you call a fish with four eyes?
๐︎ 26
๐
︎ Dec 12 2020
My four year old has been learning Spanish for a year, and he still canโt say โpleaseโ
I think thatโs poor for four
๐︎ 182
๐
︎ Dec 19 2020
The twelve days of Jokemas, day four
Want to hear a chimney joke?
I got stacks of them, first one's on the house
๐︎ 12
๐
︎ Dec 16 2020
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
๐︎ 77
๐
︎ Nov 25 2020
One bucket, two bucketth, three bucketth, four bucketth...
Sorry, itโs my bucket lisp
๐︎ 23
๐
︎ Dec 01 2020
An man at a bar didnโt want his wife to know he was out all night. But he was so drunk he couldnโt even stand and had to crawl all the way back home on all fours.
He got home he reached up for the door knob and opened the door, crawled upstairs and into his bed with his wife. His wife in the morning said โWhy were you out all night?โ He said โHow did you find out?โ
She said โThe bar called. They said you left your wheelchair againโ.
๐︎ 12
๐
︎ Dec 26 2020
My four year old son threw his ball that landed on my laptop keyboard while I was typing
And said โI guess the ball is working today!โ. His first real joke. Iโm so proud!
๐︎ 3
๐
︎ Jan 08 2021
Called my local restaurant for reservation. Hey are you guys open for reservations? They replied four to nine today
Looks like they are too busy today
๐︎ 2
๐
︎ Jan 06 2021
I saw a drunk dude riding in a boat on the chests of four women with average bust size, one of whom had a single mastectomy.
He was sailing on the seven Cโs
๐︎ 4
๐
︎ Dec 09 2020
Who was the only celebrity with four body parts in his name?
๐︎ 15
๐
︎ Nov 26 2020
Four Seasons Total Lawn Care created some good ones after the bizarre press conference Saturday such as "Lawn and Order" and "Make America Rake Again" - I don't see them using this one on their promotional materials though:
๐︎ 5
๐
︎ Nov 09 2020
There once was a record store. The owner was seventy-four. One day he fell ill then wrote in his will , โbury me with records galoreโ
It was his vinyl resting place
๐︎ 10
๐
︎ Nov 14 2020
What did Daryl say to Greg when four regular folks descend from a UFO?
I never expected to see pair a normal beings when I started studying alien aircraft, you follow, G?
๐︎ 2
๐
︎ Nov 04 2020
Four men waiting in the hospital
Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, โCongratulations! Youโre the father of twins.โ
โThatโs odd,โ answers the man. โI work for the Minnesota Twins!โ
A nurse says to the second guy, โCongratulations! Youโre the father of triplets!โ
โThatโs weird,โ answers the second man. โI work for the 3M company!โ
A nurse tells the third man, โCongratulations! Youโre the father of quadruplets!โ
โThatโs strange,โ he answers. โI work for the Four Seasons hotel!โ
The last man is groaning and banging his head against the wall. โWhatโs wrong?โ the others ask.
โI work for 7 Up!โ
๐︎ 6
๐
︎ Nov 23 2020
I saw a man going up a hill with a trolley full of horseshoes, four leaf clovers and rabbit's feet...
I thought, โWell he's pushing his luck!โ
๐︎ 27
๐
︎ Nov 09 2020
My four year old: Daddy, what is Alexa scared of?
Me: She's just a robot, I don't think she ever feels fear.
My son: She's scared of getting Alexa-cuted.
๐︎ 273
๐
︎ Jul 29 2020
How did they fund four weddings and a funeral?
๐︎ 8
๐
︎ Oct 06 2020
I have four problems in life:
Counting, remembering and counting.
๐︎ 2
๐
︎ Nov 26 2020
Whatโs big, green, fuzzy, has four legs, and will kill you if it falls on you out of a tree?
๐︎ 133
๐
︎ Jul 22 2020
What did the two-by-four say to the cement?
"I'm board!"
The cement responded, saying "that joke leaves me mortar-fied."
๐︎ 3
๐
︎ Oct 24 2020
Never iron your four leaf clover.
You don't want to press your luck.
๐︎ 16
๐
︎ Mar 17 2021
What rock group has four men that don't sing?
๐︎ 51
๐
︎ Feb 14 2021
What Rock Group has four men that don't sing?
๐︎ 78
๐
︎ Feb 02 2021
TIL: Humans are born with four kidneys
When they grow up, two of them becomes adult knees
๐︎ 17k
๐
︎ Sep 24 2020
In ancient Rome there were four different types of poison...
Poisons I, II, and III were deadly...
Poison IV just made you itchy.
๐︎ 38
๐
︎ Feb 10 2021
What rock group has only four members and none of them sing?
๐︎ 9k
๐
︎ Aug 21 2020
What rock group has four men that don't sing?
๐︎ 564
๐
︎ Oct 24 2020
What rock group has four men that don't sing?
๐︎ 76
๐
︎ Nov 06 2020
My four year old has been learning Spanish and still canโt say the word please.
Which I think is poor for four.
๐︎ 29
๐
︎ Oct 23 2020
Today I saw a man pushing a wheelbarrow full of four leaf clovers,rabbits feet and horseshoes.
He was really pushing his luck
๐︎ 7
๐
︎ Nov 12 2020
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
