Remember that show from the 70’s about the guy who quit martial arts for 17 years then went back to Brooklyn to teach karate to high school kids?
It was called “Welcome Back Kata”
A Fender bender between art & music. (Which is Punnier, the title or comment?😭)
I was never good at art at school.
I couldn't even draw a blank.
I'm convinced that the music they played at high school dances is part of the reason our generation struggles to maintain long-term relationships.
If it hadn't been for Cotton-Eyed Joe, I'd have been married a long time ago.
A couple of guys robbed an art gallery, but then their van wouldn't start...
Because they didn't have the Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.
I was starting a piece of art but I didn’t like how it was turning out.
I took my son to the art gallery, and he seemed to have a great time! He was not only impressed by the art, but also what was holding it…..
I guess you could say he was easel-y amused!
Not a dad joke, but my high school art teacher
I always had his class right after lunch and would often be a little late because of traffic and whatever. Every time someone was late a second time he would say. " that's your second tardy; you know what that makes you?" "Retardy" his delivery was always with a straight face and then he would laugh.
Did you hear about that boulder that was on a hill and flunked high school?
It makes me so sad, he had a lot of potential.
I've mastered the art of sitting down using just one word.
If Metallica went to the Jim Henson school of Arts and Media...
Would they graduate with a Master of Puppets?
(Kudos to my brother for this one.)
Funnily enough, animals like chickens and cows make pretty good high school teachers
They are pro-teen after all
They kicked me out of art school when my sculpture didn't work out as planned.
I reached my statue of limitations.
I heard companies have been hiring a lot of art graduates as data storage managers
Makes sense. They can never have too many professional drawers
My high school did a musical of a guy taking a girl out to dinner...
Art by Cyanide & Happiness
Did you hear about the art expert that broke his friend out of prison?
So a sensei or ‘teacher’ at a martial arts school brings a bowl of crispy wontons to class.
He sets it on a plinth and tells the students they’re free to take a couple after class is over. Halfway through teaching the senpai or sensei’s assistant approaches and tells him he has an important phone call. He tells the class to find a partner and practice. He comes back fifteen minutes later and the plinth is knocked over, the bowl is in pieces and the wontons crushed and scattered about. He is dismayed that his students would engage in such sensei-less wonton destruction.
One day, Anne decided to create some pencil and paper art. So she grabbed some of her chopped Terra Cotta and decided to create her art at a comedy club. There,
My son grows a lot of fur and manufactures products of art or craft on nights when the moon is full...
If Banksy made a series of street art on one street without permission?
He probably would name it a...
...illegalery.
Why did Dracula get kicked out of art school?
He could only draw blood.
When Miley Cyrus dances scantily clad and licks a hammer it’s call art…
When I do it, I get kicked out of Home Depot.
Found this... fan art and thought I'd share
Daughter: For gym today we played basketball and for art we painted
Dad: who are Jim & Art?
Daughter: They’re CLASSES!
Dad: oh, like brothers? Jim and Art Class?
Daughter: Stares with the hatred of a thousand Gen Zs…
I'm going to start a low carb, high fat and protein combined with martial arts diet
Did you hear Ben and Jerry's are gonna stop making ice cream and start their own branch of martial arts?
What kind of music does Santa and his elves like?
For art class, my daughter made a tree sculpture with thin strips of aluminum.
I heard Disney opened up a high school with a diverse field of study
They even had a 101 on Dalmatians
Why did the student throw a 64 pack of Crayola crayons at his art teacher after he was done with his test?
He wanted to pass with flying colors.
I thought of that myself.
What is the favorite genre of music to lead, cadmium, mercury, iron, gold, platinum, and uranium?
If you went to school and majored in music specializing in percussion....
Would you have to have declared yourself a drum major?
My cousin's middle school student drew this in her art class
Back in high school I led a movement to eliminate some of the alphabet's unnecessary letters. Our first target the 25th letter.
I know of a guy who has taken advantage of the recent lockdown to make a new playlist for his next hike. It’s got music from ‘The Peanuts’, ‘The Cranberries’ and ‘Eminem’
It’s called ‘The Trail Mix’
Why is the minister of art always so shallow?
Because they are Art Official
I had to write a 500 word essay on a language of India back in high school...
I titled it The Hindi 500.
My wife asked me whether I experimented with sex and drugs when I was in high school, and I said Yes.
Unfortunately I was part of the control group.
What can you say about a HIP-HOP ARTIST that performs the music of TODAY?
Santa Claus really likes him because he’s RAPPING the PRESENT.
(That joke was 2 punny)
Did you hear about the band that got cancelled by PETA for their album art featuring trees made of flesh?
They caught a lot of meatwood flack
My mom played the clarinet in high school. She mentioned she wanted to play again, but doesn't have the money to waste on it. I ordered one for her birthday and left her a subtle clue.
After hearing me perform, my music teacher in school told me I should be tenor.
Tenor twelve feet away from all musical instruments at all times.
My wife started making art by putting paint on her wheels and driving them all over the canvas.
not to brag, but they all look like van Gogh's
Why did the art thief's van run out of fuel?
He had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh
Why did the art thief’s van run out of gas as he drove away from the museum?
Because he had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.
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