As other world powers may or may not know, President Dési Bouterse is on impeachment trial for the bribery of government officials. The proceedings, along with the trial against fellow National Democratic Party member Rashied Doekhi, have come to a close, and the National Assembly is now deliberating. The National Assembly must have 25 out of 49 votes to impeach in order for either official to be removed from office, since, naturally, neither accused may vote.

[M] It's a tossup in the assembly. A dice roll of more than 10 ends in a not guilty verdict. A dice roll of 10 or less results in a guilty verdict.

>1d20 /u/iSandpeople: 4

The judgment of the National Assembly has been entered, and the verdict is

###GUILTY

the vote count is 28-21.

In a reasonable, yet unexpected result, the alliance of the People's Alliance for Progress (VVV), the New Front for Democracy and Development (NFDO), and the A-Combination (A-COM), plus more than a few members of Bouterse's own party, the National Democratic Party, emerge with a guilty verdict. In addition, Congressman Rashied Doekhi's verdict is also GUILTY.

Vice President Ashwin Adhin will take Bouterse's spot. He has already been sworn in, and is now the acting President of Suriname. The new vice president is Assembly Chairwoman Jennifer Simons, and the new Chairperson of the National Assembly is Anton Paal.

Bouterse was sentenced to 18 months in prison with parole.

I've been studying Suriname, and it seems like Bouterse is somewhat a corrupt leader, am I wrong? He led a drug ring and orchestrated a massacre. I'm wondering what you think about him as citizens.

In July 1999, Bouterse was convicted in absentia in the Netherlands to 11 years in prison for trafficking 474 kilograms of cocaine.

Since 1999 Europol has ordered an international warrant for his arrest. According to the United Nations Convention against illicit Traffic in Narcotic Drugs and Psychotropic Substances, since Bouterse was convicted before his election as Head of State in 2010, he has no immunity.

We also want Dési Bouterse to stand trial for the murder of Frank Wijngaarde. Who was killed during the 1982 December murders.

We call upon the government of Suriname to extradite Dési Bouterse to the Netherlands. In return Suriname will receive 25 million euro's of foreign aid in 2016.

As Mr. Bouterse was convicted over a decade ago, there will be no trials or hearings to determine his guilt or innocence. Mr Bouterse will serve until 2030.

We thank The Netherlands on the level of cooperation that our two nations have been able to achieve for this.

President Chan Santokhi’s Elephant Coup did what it aimed to -- establish Hindu hegemony over the Surinamese political system. The first priority of this new administration was to defuse the crisis, specifically the Guyanese, Chinese, and American forces stationed in and around Suriname. After these prospective invaders were convinced to leave, President Santokhi has begun solidifying his party’s political control over Suriname. Ex-president Jenifer Simons and her cabinet were removed from office and tried; 10 National Democratic Party and 2 Progressive Workers’ and Farmers’ Union legislators were expelled from the National Assembly. These seats in Suriname’s parliament will not be filled until the scheduled election in 2030. Conveniently, the removal of these opposition legislators means that Santokhi’s United Hindu Party (UHP) no longer just holds a plurality of the seat in the National Assembly, but a majority.

As the UHP begins to legislate without having to worry about the silly multi-ethnic parties and their silly opinions, it will use the recently seized reins of Suriname’s administrative apparatus to make sure that no one, no party, and no intervening foreign power will be able to successfully challenge its reign in the 2030 elections.

External Threats

To Suriname’s east? An EU and NATO member “strongly committed to human rights” -- France. Bleck! To the west? A pro-US, pro-”democracy” nation with a hard on for the West -- Guyana. Ick! To the south? A war-hungry right wing bureaucracy that’s threatened to invade us once before -- Brazil. Yikes! The previous government was deeply flawed, but the UHP is thankful for its obsession with prepping Suriname for an invasion. Foreign powers will likely take issue with what is to come in the United Hindu Party’s Suriname. It is important that the nation prepare itself for the day they deem Suriname has gone too far and try to topple the UHP’s administration like they helped us topple the NDP’s, for self determination is only for those who lick the sole of the West.

The UHP will continue the NDP’s expansion of Suriname’s military capabilities, but start to focus on a slice of the armed forces they ignored -- the Directorate of National Security (DNS). The Surinamese DNS is its sole intelligence agency, and its primary fun

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

Thanks for Everything!

Suriname was, until after the 2020 elections, diplomatically uninteresting. It’s approach to attracting aid and investment was nearly identical to every other nation in South America -- taking support from wherever it could be found. Suriname was unconcerned with global power blocs. If the aid flowed, all was well. The 2020 elections kicked the autocratic General Dési Bouterse out of the nation, and with him went Surinamese political complacency. Suddenly politics were contentious again, because the General was no longer hogging all the power. Everyone had a chance to grab power. In 2020, by wielding a broad coalition of small opposition parties, the Hindu dominated Progressive Reform Party (PRP) wrenched legislative domination from Dési’s old party, the National Democratic Party (NDP).

What was the first bill the PRP passed with its new found influence? Leaving the Organization of Islamic Cooperation. While only ~10% of Surinamese are Muslim, it joined in the 90s as a way to secure aid from wealthy petrostates and attract investment in Suriname’s own petroleum industry -- membership requirements were a lot looser back then. The Hindu dominated PRP spearheaded Suriname’s exit from the organization, because, according to the PRP, “OIC membership no longer reflects the ethnic truths of life in Suriname.” Consequently, Suriname no longer receives aid from the OIC. This was the first instance where accepting or denying aid became a matter of national political debate, not an immediate yes. The PRP eventually evolved into the more openly Hindu nationalist United Hindu Party.

In the following years -- and election cycles -- Suriname has found other benefactors. At the urging of the PRP, Suriname has entered aid deals with India, receiving mostly civilian investment but also a revamp of the National Army’s helicopter fleet. The second big push towards the politicization of foreign aid in Suriname was the 2022 Tigri Area border dispute with Guyana, and unlike the first push, was spearheaded not by the Hindus, but the multiethnic NDP. In an attempt to make a name for the party other than “the dictator Dési Bouterse’s old party,” the NDP is now selling itself as the party with the strongest foreing policy and national defense platform. It was for this reason that the NDP held executive branch deployed the National Army to the Tigri Area, which was a claim by Suriname and under Guyanese occupation. At this, Brazil threatened to invade S

It really does, I swear!

Buenosdillas

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Before the arrival of Europeans, many native tribes had long lived in the area now known as Suriname. When the first European explorers arrived, they mostly encountered what are today known as the Kalina people.

Early Days

1630 = the first attempt at European settlement was by English settlers, but the settlement failed financially and also had problems with the native population.

1650 = Lord Willoughby, Governor of Barbados (a colony of England), established a colony called Willoughbyland.

1665 = Second Anglo-Dutch War. during the war the Dutch capture Willoughbyland.

Dutch Colony

1667 = Treaty of Breda. England is given control of New Netherland in exchange for Dutch control of Willoughbyland.

1762 = the Dutch sign a treaty with the Maroons recognizing their independence. the Maroons were escaped slaves who set up a community in the interior.

1799 = occupied by the British because the Netherlands were absorbed into Napoleon’s empire.

1816 = return to Dutch control after the end of the Napoleonic Wars.

1863 = slavery is abolished in Suriname.

1941 = occupied by American troops for the remainder of World War 2 because Germany had conquered the Netherlands.

1954 = became a constituent country of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, which was basically another name for a protectorate.

Independence and the Tyrant Bouterse

1975 = Suriname becomes an independent nation.

1980 = 1980 Surinamese coup d’état. Dési Bouterse, an army officer, seizes power and becomes dictator.

1982 = December murders. 15 prominent critics of the dictatorship were murdered on the orders of dictator Bouterse.

1986 = Surinamese Interior War. a Maroon guerrilla army led by Ronnie Brunswijk waged war against Bouterse’s National Army. Brunswijk demanded democratic reforms, civil rights, and economic development for Suriname’s Maroon population.

1987 = Bouterse, because of widespread international

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

No longer are there any givens in Surinamese politics. Gone are the days of what-Bouterse-says-goes. Even if his party isn’t gone, his way of politics is. Surinamese government in the 2020s is marked by reluctant cooperation. The executive branch is still under NDP control. The legislature has been seized by a coalition of what was once the opposition. The judiciary is simply vibing. Detailed below are some of the happenings in the capital, Paramaribo, since the 2020 elections.

Suriname leaves the Organization of Islamic Cooperation...

Along its campaign trail, the Progressive Reform Party, the leading party of the V7 joint list and largest party in the National Assembly, had been critical of Bouterse and the NDP’s foreign policy. This slice of his administration is oft talked about. Bouterse was skeptical of collaboration with most nations and often refused foreign aid. Cryptically, though, the Bouterse government successfully led an effort to join the Organization of Islamic Cooperation in 1996. This was at a time when the Republic of Suriname was getting denied aid from the West because of the authoritarian regime in power, but the OIC’s entrance requirements were slim to none, and they were more than willing to support a third world state with potentially massive oil reserves.

35 years later, Chairman of the National Assembly, Chan Santokhi brought forward a bill calling for Suriname’s exit from the Organization. His arguments were threefold:

• a) Suriname was not given a vote in the Organization’s Parliament. Our fate shouldn’t be determined by states thousands of miles away.

• b) The funding we were after has dried up. The OIC has forgotten us. Investment from our “muslims brothers” has stopped.

• c) It is dishonest to be a member of the organization. Membership doesn’t accurately reflect the “ethnic truths” of life in Suriname.

The consensus on the bill in the National Assembly was resoundingly supportive:

[Removed]

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why