Dog Weekend Puns

They only had one dog. It was a Shih Tzu.

He is Espanyol

It's Saturday, and it's a turd, eh...

"Wrecked him?" Johnnie said. "Damn near killed him!"

Over the weekend, while working in the yard, a neighbor walked by and asked if I had seen their dog. I told her I hadn't, but I would keep watch out for it.

A little bit later a police cruiser pulled up and asked if I had seen a shih tzu. I told them that there was one in Columbus and one in Cincinnati, but they were both pretty good. The passenger rolled his eyes, but the driver literally laughed out loud. The dad was apparent.

My dad, my brothers, and I have been at our family farm (we don't live there) for the weekend of the 4th. Last night we were outside shooting off fireworks, as any real American does on the 4th. About 50 feet in front of the house is a 4 foot high fence. My dad discovered that one of the cracker launchers we had fit perfectly in the upper part to launch the crackers into the air at an angle. Always the cautious one of the bunch, I responded to his idea:

"I dunno dad, I'm on the fence about this one."

Naturally, my brothers congratulated me on how lame my jokes were and told me to go inside and make more hot dogs.

My dad and I were at a work friends house for a party this past weekend. We learned our friend had a terrier named Bear. My work friend asked if anyone needed drinks, since it was hot on the deck. As the owner went inside, bear followed him, and squeezed in after our friend shut his sliding glass door. His wife said "oh man, the dog almost didnt make it." My dad without missing a beat goes "I guess you can say he BEAR-LY made it." Dadgum it dad.