The main dog actor in a film got sick so they asked my dog to fill in for him.

He’s the Sub-Woofer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pee_diddy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2023
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I recently heard about this young adult novel in which Schrodinger’s cat and Pavlov’s dog team up for a cross county adventure...

So I headed down to the library to see if they had a copy. The librarian said that my description rang a bell but she wasn’t sure if it was there or not.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BardokObama
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2021
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When a witch went whale watching

This is an original "shaggy dog story" style Dad joke that I wrote recently. Enjoy. :)

The whale watching witch

Remember the story of the wicked witch from Hansel & Gretel? Reports of her death were greatly exaggerated. What actually happened is simply that she retired from being a wicked witch. Instead she decided to become a good witch and travel around the globe by boat. Being a witch, she wasn't very conventional, so she went on eBay and bought herself an ex-navy submarine to use for travelling the world.

One day she decided to go whale watching. Our repentant witch cruised into whale watching territory in the comfort of her refurbished submarine. She neatly surfaced, and manoeuvred her sub into a position alongside several boats that were offering whale watching cruises to rich tourists. Armed with her favourite binoculars, she stood on the conning tower, hoping to get a good view of the action. She soon found herself admiring some giant whales frolicking together in the ocean.

Suddenly, one of the whales headed right for her submarine. Instantly, our friend the witch realized that the whale thought that her vessel would make a good dinner, and was about to swallow it whole. At the last moment, she leapt overboard, just managing to escape, as the mouth of the whale closed over her submarine, swallowing it in one giant gulp.

Meanwhile, one of the tourists on a nearby whale watching cruise had been filming everything. "You'll never believe what I saw!" he cried, "But I got it all on video, and I'm pretty sure it will go viral. I just saw a whale eating a sub sans witch!"

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2022
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What noise do porcupines make when they kiss?

Ouch…

Can’t take the credit as it’s from the new Clifford the big red dog film!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/monpellierre2805
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2022
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A simple question taken in a different direction

Me: What's up? Dad: Up is an animated film about an old man, a boyscout knockoff, and a talking dog that try and save a rainbow bird named Kevin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hugthebed2
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2014
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