I recently went to a 311 and dirty heads concert at key bank pavillion in Cleveland, Ohio. The band through out these badass led light up wands that changed colors. I was able to score one but accidentaly left it in the Uber. If anyone knows how or where to find another please let me know :)

Do your worst!

I've been writing HP fanfic for the last several years (I'm slow... don't make fun of me!) and over the past few weeks I've been thinking in detail about all of the little shortcuts I take, or rules of thumb I apply, when writing paragraph by paragraph.

Most writers out there have probably seen advice such as "show, don't tell," "don't overruse/underuse adverbs", and "banish said from your vocabulary." General rules like these are great and all, but sometimes it's nice to have a cheatsheet.

So I looked through some of my recent writing and compiled one: a list of dirty tricks I use when I'm feeling lazy. I don't claim they're all proper, nor should they be taken as prescriptive or the golden standard, but they seem to work well enough. A few of these are a bit tongue in cheek, but they all have some truth in them.

1. Avoid parentheses.

If you use parentheses, it means the thing you've written wasn't necessary, so you can delete it. If it was necessary, it shouldn't have been relegated to parentheses. If you do want to put in a semi-parenthetical—like this—use em dashes instead.

2. Tired of using "said" substitutes and just want to use "said" a few times without feeling guilty?

Switch the order of the the subject and verb in back-to-back uses:

>"I am tired of writing this fic," Ginny said.
>
>"You should have used this questionable cheatsheet," said Harry.

Would the readers have noticed two "X said"s in a row? Probably not, but at least you'll feel better!

3. Want to avoid breaking the flow of general dialogue?

Put the dialogue tag as a dependent clause (or whatever it's called) right in the middle of the sentence, setting it off by (usually) commas:

>"You know," said Harry, adjusting his tie, "I think I need a drink."

I do this way too much. Please send help.

4. Punchy banter and repartee between two characters is fun. Adding too many dialogue tags ("he said", "she said") can interrupt that flow. So how do you maintain the rhythm of the scene without having readers lose track of which character is speaking?

Every second or third line, add either a dialogue tag or a reference to the addressee. This way, the reader can keep up-to-date on who is speaking.

>[in the middle of a scene with Harry and Ginny]
>
>"You think you're so funny, don't you, Potter?"
>
>"How do you mean?"
>
>*

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

If you like these posts, hit me up for some one-on-one help, or support my work on Patreon!

Adventures

Pocket Dungeons

• Pocket Dungeon - Mystery at Lake Crystal - D&D-flavored "Friday the 13th"
• Pocket Dungeon - Deep in the Mountains - A missing shaman and a village under seige
• Pocket Dungeon - The Last Journey of Father Brown - Transporting a dead body should be a simple matter, right?
• Pocket Dungeon - The Cursed Gold - Why greed is good for drama
• Pocket Dungeon - The Rise of the Revencravik - Can the party stop the invasion of Hellcrows?
• Pocket Dungeon - The Waystation at Morcomb-Tor - Something is very wrong in this mountain community, and the Party and their children are caught in the middle
• Pocket Dungeon - The Dirty Big Hole - A missing beauty queen and a mysterious hole are just some of the mysteries in this weird adventure

Seeds

• Nightwatch - A Campaign Premise - D&D Cops
• The Canterbury Tales - A Campaign Premise - All Cleric campaign
• The Sun Egg - A Campaign Premise - A campaign centered on a Tarrasque egg
• Band on the Run - A Campaign Premise - All Bard campaign
• The Tavern - A Campaign Premise - A stationary campaign
• Fury Road: From Film to Module - Making the movie a One-Shot
• Escape from New Gygax - A twist on "Escape from New York"
• Escape From New Gygax - The Factions 01 - A twist on "Escape from New York"
• Escape From New Gygax - The Factions 02 - A twist on "Escape from New York"

Encounters

• 50 Plot Hooks for the Arctic - A list!
• 50 Plot Hooks for Fighters - A list!
• 50 Plot Hooks for Swamps - A list!
• [50 Plot Hooks for Rangers](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnDBeh

Pilot on me!!

Harry's a very fascinating character to analyze and is my personal favorite character of the entire series. But holy shit the films really dummed him down HARD. Like book harry was lucky, but not nearly as lucky as his film counterpart, it's stupid. The changes they made to harry is so much worse, because it's not like just one scene removed, it's all the films and is a whole assassination of his character, they're practically different people.

Okay like not related but kinda a little. He's turned into a wise cracking ass hole in the films, lines like ''but i am the chosen one'' just don't feel like him, yk. It doesn't sound like something he would say. Even in GOF when he opens in the egg he's like ''WHO WANTS ME TO OPEN IT?'', idk it just doesn't feel like him in the slightest. But back to my main point.

The Philosopher's Stone.

Probably one of the dumbest changes ever, and subsequently ruins something i loved about harry. The fact that he's not willing to ever in his life, even once, be tempted to end another person's life. But the film just throws that away and has HARRY MURDER QUIRREL. Now, harry in the book didn't kill him. He just burned him. What really killed quirrel, was voldemort leaving his body, and the fact that harry didn't even have the strength to do it, since dumbles was holding him back. It may seem like a small change, but its huge. Because harry potter killed a man at age eleven. He didn't even kill his mortal enemy, but he kills quirrel? It's stupid.

The Chamber Of Secrets.

Another seemingly tiny change, but kinda big. Harry's fight with the basilisk is so much more prolonged in the film, and it makes him look so much more weaker than he really is. Like he runs away and stuff, like boi you have the sword kill it. It was an amazing moment and defining scene for his character, to show that he really can handle himself and was capable of being a gryffindoor. But the film just dums down to his character in this scene. Even the lines when he taunts voldy is cut from the film too.

*“You’re not,” he said, his quiet voice full of hatred. “Not what?” snapped Riddle. “Not the greatest sorcerer in the world,” said Harry, breathing fast. “Sorry to disappoint you and all that, but the greatest wizard in the world is Albus Dumbledore. Everyone says so. Even when you were strong, you didn’t dare try and take over at Hogwarts. Dumbledore saw through you when you were at school and he still frightens you now, wherever you’re hiding these

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At this point, Alex would have been well and truly lost, if not for his hud. The map it was slowly creating as he walked helping him identify his overall direction, stopping him from wandering around in circles.

His battle with the spider creature had been five hours ago now, according to his clock - if he could trust it. If nothing else, the long walk had given him loads of time to think about his situation. All of the wounds he had sustained before his death had well and truly disappeared, scars and all.

But for whatever reason, one scar, both mental and physical, one that he had purposely kept with him as a reminder, stayed. His left arm, at one point completely severed, had stayed as such - still made out of metal.

Alex could have replaced it with a biological replacement, but he had specifically asked for the bionic. It was a way to remind himself of his failure - his failure to save his friend, and his arm; both lost to the same monster.

His bionic arm still remained, in stark contrast to the rest of his fleshy body.

While Alex didn’t know why it had stayed, he wasn’t going to complain - it would continue its purpose of reminding him, and he’d be comforted by that fact.

Another thing that Alex had done over his long walk was to check over his armour - seeing what functioned and what didn’t. As far as he was able to tell, his armour was in mint condition.

Of course, this could be attributed to the nanomachines constantly on the ready to repair any damage - but that’d leave an automated log of what had been fixed. And no matter where he looked, he couldn't find his repair history.

So, as far as he could tell, it had been brought back to its best state. An odd circumstance to be sure. But as with most odd things that had happened to him in the last couple hours, the monster things included, he couldn’t bring himself to ponder too much about it.

As he contemplated this fact, he opened and closed the guiding flaps for his thrusters, which had proved their functi

(I updated the post with some good insights from people's comments, I kept the original post, but added some reflections and additions below + a new deck list)

I am having a lot of fun playing standard so far. Thief Rogue creates hilarious scenarios, and it can win games quite consistently.

Things I've learned.

1. Maestra is a must, every rogue card you draw in first few turns reduces Wildpaw Gnoll
2. Staying hidden till turn 3 is typically the right play, then the Double Agents come down
3. Swashburglar is underwhelming, instead run Pandaren Importer which are really good. Allows to stay hidden (neutral card) when played on 2, helps develop a board, helps cheapen Wildpaw Gnoll.
4. In your collection, pick all standard or 1000 win portraits as favourites, otherwise the imposter hero has no golden hero power
5. Parrrley can end games
6. Rune of the Archmage is a big, juicy, delicious honey trap. Say no.
7. I don't run Cera'thine Fleetrunner. I don't have her, but she doesn't sound very good in this deck.
8. Vanessa VanCleef has given me several hero cards (and fun)

I keep on discovering new things playing this deck, any other tips and tricks for this deck you've discovered?

I found all games so far winnable. The match up I dread most is Shaman, with Snowfall Guardian they have a play I don't have an answer to most games.

Edit 1:

Thanks for the discussion, I find I learned a lot from this, and realized some mistakes I made.

Things I learned thanks to comments:

1. Rune of the Archmage is good, just don't play it expecting your own board to survive
2. Pandaren actually doesn't help discount the Gnoll, you get an off-class spell while being that off-class so Gnoll stays at same cost. I still like the card, but I wasn't half as clever as I thought I was.
3. My point on CTF was also stupid, I assumed the original mana cost of your minions were relevant to her, i.e. low cost minions creating other low cost minions, but they do not, it's completely random. She could be good, I can't tell. (Will craft her).
4. Lot of discussion on Blackwater Cutlass. I still think running two is fine, the extra draw + discount spell is good in turns 1 and 2 when waiting to play Double Agent on 3. It's the only answer versus Trogg. And late game the trade gets at times offset due to spell reduction.

The deck I run:

Thief Rogue

Class: Rogue

Format: Standard

Year of the Gryphon

2x (0) Shadowstep

2x (1) Blackjack Stunner

2x (1) Blackwater Cutlass

2x (1

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Did you know 100% of deaths in DCSS are the result of taking damage? The common melee brute builds may appear efficient at first, but they suffer from a critical flaw - they let the enemy hit you. Every single time an enemy applies its claws, club, arrows, or reality shattering magic to your sensitive skin, you are exposed to the leading cause of mortality in the Dungeon. I therefore propose an alternative that will make your journey down into the depths 50% less painful, 100% less lonely, and most importantly, 300% fluffier.

The Felid Summoner (of Gozag, and potentially Jiyva later on).

Cats have a terrible reputation for being, supposedly, a "challenge race", a "tedious ordeal of optimal play" or even an "unfun experience I'd never do again". I'm here to inform you that this is all baseless canine propaganda, and I hope you too will learn to bow before your true feline masters as you read through this guide. As a cat, you will be able to laugh in the face of paralysis (due to your high willpower), laugh in the face of invisible enemies (due to your intrinsic SInv), and even occasionally laugh in the face of death. This all comes at the high price of having the lowest amount of hit points in the game, and the inability to use any item besides consumables, evokables and jewellery. Thankfully, you won't need any of the baubles inferior humanoids depend on, as you will delegate most of the dirty work to pathetically obedient underlings.

This guide was written for 0.28 (trunk, at the time of writing). Do not attempt this in 0.27 or lower, or your fate will be swift and very, very sad. The target audience here are players who have already won at least once, and would like a kind of build that's a bit off the beaten path of the tried and true brute/caster duality, or even their first Felid victory. However, if you're still looking for your first victory ever, there's nothing stopping you from attempting this! I got my first win ever as a Felid (with this build, without the Atlas), and I believe that the caution and focus that one learns from playing this race is valuable on any character.

As the title suggests, pick Felid for your species (ignore the "Advanced" difficulty: that's merely a ploy to hide true power from your grasp). Pick Summoner for your background, as is wisely recommended by the game.

An Agonizing Introduction (XP Level 1)

Upon starting your run, you will be met with the following:

• 7 pitiful HP points, enough to get two-shotted by

I won't be doing that today!

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

I’m not a psychic, but Barry Morphew’s attorneys sure are predictable. I called it last month. I said they were going to file for a change of venue and they sure did!

Funny enough, not a single mention of that “exculpatory evidence” they insisted had been withheld from them. Still no affidavit detailing the alleged prosecutorial misconduct, either. What about that threat of a civil lawsuit they leaked to the media that they have yet to substantiate even one single allegation made against every single name they tried to publicly defame in that notice? Zip. Zero. Zilch. Nada.

Guess they still haven’t figured out how to get these charges against their client dismissed!

Seems like Barry’s duo of defense gals are still shooting blanks and causing a heck of a lot of commotion without any substantive evidence to back ANY their claims.

Let’s also not forget the show pony antics they pulled last hearing claiming their defendant’s girlfriend’s law firm was “a conflict of interest,” that THEY themselves created! After all, one of Barry’s own defense lawyers is married to a partner in Shoshona’s legal defense firm, whom was conveniently hired by this witness who already knew a conflict existed.

If you watch enough of these magic shows, you begin to easily catch on to every single trick they are going to try to pull out of their silly little black hat.

Just remember folks, magic is not reality. It’s just smoke and mirrors and sleight of hand to keep you looking in one direction while they try to get you to not notice their hands being deceptive in the other.

If they had an innocent client they wouldn’t have to keep pulling stunts at every corner. Why not get to the meat and potatoes of their defense and start proving their very serious and egregious violations and allegations? Hmmm, could it be that they have nothing but filler? All beans and no frank like Barry?

I’m thinking that no matter where Barry and his lawyers try to run, they aren’t going to be able to hide his dirty little secrets from any jury anywhere. There is no little white rabbit hiding in that magician’s hat. There are mountain lions, chipmunks and elk galore, but Barry’s defense surely looks like it’s falling to straight to the floor.

It truly must suck to have paid all that money to a high priced defense team whose strategies and tactics are SO predictable the entire world can see their next card before they even pull it! Yikes, if I were him I’d have hoped they waved their little crooked

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

There hasn't been a post all year!