Dine Area Puns

So, my wife and I decided to move this freestanding shelf thing to our dining area. However, we have wood floors, so pretty much anything that's put there (table, chairs) has to have these felt pads on the bottom so it doesn't scratch up the floor. Even if this won't get moved around much, if at all, I felt better about putting the pads on the bottom of this shelf as well, just in case.

My wife has been bugging me to do it for a while, but you know, laziness. Finally, earlier tonight, I cut the felt sheets to size, stuck them on the shelf, and put it where it belongs. When I was done, I called my wife over. "I'm in bed!" "It'll be quick, I promise!" groan "You don't even have to come downstairs, you can see it from the hallway outside the bedroom door!"

Finally she came out, with a "this had better be good" look on her face. I pointed to the shelf, and proudly declared that "I felt up this rack!"

Worth it.

They're an older couple and Bud (RIP) loved to mess with his wife. We all sat down for dinner one night, but in order to get into the dining area you had to go down a single stair. Bud's wife said "Watch the step"... as we all fill our plates, Bud is still standing there. His wife said, "Come on Bud, it's time to eat." to which he followed with "You told me to watch the step!"

Peering into the dining area "Nope, it looks like an alright place."

Wish I could say I witnessed this one, or better yet said it. However it was my father's good friend who said this to a host when asked at an upscale restaurant if he had a reservation.

Though not the typical cringe worthy dad joke, I would like to still think it fits in.