Guys, to be frank

I would have to change my name

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📅︎ Mar 28 2018
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I met an Asian guy at a party and asked him, “Are you Chris Chen?”

He said: No, my name is Daniel. Do all Asian guys look the same to you?

Me: No. I meant, do you accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior?

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📅︎ Nov 25 2018
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My son asked me,”can I have a book mark?”

I started crying.

15 years and he still doesn’t know that my name is Daniel.

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📅︎ Jun 27 2019
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Star Wars Puns

From movie puns we provide you the funniest collection of Star Wars puns

What do you call 5 siths piled on top of a lightsaber? A Sith-Kabob!


Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns? So it doesn’t Hang Solow!


Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda for money? Because he’s always a little short


What program do Jedi use to view PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi


What do you call the website Chewbacca started that gives out Empire secrets? Wookieeleaks


What do you call a Jedi in denial? Obi-Wan Cannot Be


Where does Princess Leia go shopping for clothing? At the Darth Maul


Greg: Which Star Wars character travels around the world? Craig: Who? Greg: Globi-wan Kenobi!


Matthew: What does a Star Destroyer wear to a wedding? Daniel: What? Matthew: Bow ties, of course!


Deen Why was the droid angry? Mark: Why? Deen People kept pushing its buttons.


Luke: Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road? Lei Not sure. Luke: To get to the Dark Side.


Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas. Luke: How do you know? Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.


What do Whipids say when they kiss? Ouch.


What is a jedi’s favorite toy? A yo-yoda


What do you call a pirate droid? Argh2-D2


Where does Jabba the Hutt eat? Pizza Hutt


What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name? “The” Why is Han Solo a loner? Because he’s solo.


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi What do you call a Sith who won’t fight? A Sithy.


What time is it when Darth Vader steps on your chronometer? Time to get a new chronometer.


What do you call a pirate droid? Arrrrgh-2-D2


Which side of a wookie has the most hair? The outside.


Where does Jabba eat dinner? Pizza Hutt


Who do Jedi call to help open PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call someone that tries to be a Jedi? Obi-Wannabe


What do you call a bounty hunter from Alabama? Bubba Fett


What time is it when Jabba the Hutt sits on your blaster? Time to get a new blaster! Why is Luke


Skywalker always invited on picnics? He always has the forks with him.


Which imperial officer hated Thanksgiving? Grand Moff Turkeyn


What do you call stormtroopers playing Monopoly? Game of Clones


Why did

... keep reading on reddit ➡

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👤︎ u/Punsville
📅︎ May 04 2017
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Asked my son if he had brushed his teeth this morning...

He said, "Yeah, I brushed them with Daniel (little brother)."

I replied, "Most of us prefer to use a toothbrush. Does a better job."

"I did!"

me grinning at him

"Oh. Oh, mommy!"

He cracked up. I've still got it!

*Names changed to protect the innocent **Yes, I know I'm a mom, but it's still a dad joke. :)

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📅︎ Sep 24 2014
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My Christian-Dad was obviously the inspiration for Ned Flanders

Dad: "Time for bed, kids"

Kids: "Throw us in bed! Throw us in bed!"

(Dad picks a kid up in his arms)

Dad: "Did I ever tell you about the three men in the book of Daniel who were thrown into the fiery furnace?"

Kids: "No!"

Dad: "Their names were... Shadrach... Meshach... and ToBedYouGo!

(tosses squealing kid through the air, onto the bed)

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👤︎ u/cyclura
📅︎ Aug 27 2013
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Yesterday my son said “can I have a book mark?”

11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Daniel!?!

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📅︎ Apr 22 2019
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