I tried to warn my son about the dangers of Russian roulette...
It went in one ear and out of the other.
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︎ Feb 21 2021
Danger Noodle pun *hisssss* π
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︎ Aug 27 2020
I was looking for danger but I couldn't find any.
Turns out safety search was on.
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π
︎ Nov 12 2020
I bought a book about the dangers of deforestation.
The first page says, βYouβre not helping!β
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︎ May 24 2020
For sale: Book titled "The Dangers of Materialism"
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︎ Jul 16 2020
I got kicked out of karaoke after singing βDanger Zoneβ nine times in a row.
Too many Loggins attempts.
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︎ Dec 21 2019
Warned my son about the dangers of drugs today. Told him a story about a girl I knew who went crazy from doing mushrooms all the time. Surprised, he asked, "Really?" I replied, "Yes, absolutely true."
"She became a little spore addict."
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︎ May 22 2020
A judge is hearing a case. 'The people V. United Parcel Service' and determines that the trucks area nuisance and a danger to the town. He decides to ban all their trucks from the town and calls his ruling:
'UPS Truck Shun of Justice'
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︎ Apr 22 2020
My drunk friend was kicked out of Karaoke for singing βDanger Zoneβ 7 times in a row.
He had exceeded the maximum number of Loggins attempts.
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︎ May 27 2018
What's a skeleton's favorite type of danger?
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︎ Mar 16 2020
Urine Danger
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︎ Mar 29 2018
What do the US president's bodyguards say to him when he's in danger?
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︎ Feb 19 2020
Danger, Fear, and Panic came knocking at my door. It'd been ten years since the last visit, and all holding clipboards, were ready to begin the inquisition. Nervously, I opened the door and prepared myself to answer their calling.
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︎ Mar 05 2020
Watch out! r/puns is in danger
r/punpatrol
r/punKGB
r/Pun_Internal_Affairs
r/punspecialforces
These are the names of our oppressors! There may be more, but they are our greatest threat. They are currently amassing an army to try to end puns as we know it.
If we are to save this beautiful form of our language, than we must unite! We must not divide ourselves by titles, but unite ourselves as punners!
They plan on eradicating all puns by going to the source, the pun user. Are we to let ourselves be undermined by those who think they are better than us? Are we to let ourselves and all future generations be banned from puns? If you say no, then join in the revolt
##VIVA LA R/PUNS
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︎ Feb 13 2019
I went to karaoke last night. I sang Danger Zone five times, but they wouldnβt let me do it for a sixth time.
They said I had to many Loggins attempts.
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︎ Nov 26 2019
How do electricians warn each other about dangers on the job?
"Careful: this mega hurts"
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︎ Apr 27 2019
When I told my girlfriend of the dangers of overtweezing...
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︎ Oct 09 2019
I just realised, that when you say someone is in grave danger...
...itβs because theyβre going to die.
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︎ Jan 03 2019
Where's the danger?
What is the biggest danger during a thrift store fire?
Secondhand smoke.
Thank you. I will gladly accept all the goodwill you wish to impart.
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︎ Feb 12 2019
I was talking about the dangers of the web with my son. He says, βDonβt worry dad, I know all about the dark web!β
I then asked him, βWell how do you get there? Iβve tried turning off the lights and everything.β
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︎ Apr 22 2019
DANGER. DANGER.
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︎ Oct 09 2014
I got booted off stage at a Karaoke bar. I was trying to sing 'Danger Zone' from that Top Gun movie. I forgot the lyrics three times.
They said I exceeded my Loggins attempts.
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︎ May 06 2019
I just published a book on The Dangers of Overreacting.
If you guys donβt buy it, Iβll burn everything down.
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︎ Apr 09 2018
People who robbed the tombs of Pharos really put themselves in grave danger.
I'm sure this has been said before but it just came to my mind.
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︎ Feb 17 2019
π︎ 6
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︎ Feb 12 2019
Did you hear the one about the brave bird that never flew from danger?
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︎ Feb 06 2019
Democrats claiming counterfeit Viagra out of China is a danger to our democracy.
Apparently, they are trying to influence our erections.
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︎ Jan 11 2019
I know the dangers of lawnmowers first hand
Or should I say first foot?
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︎ Jun 06 2018
I was in my backyard in the hot tub last night enjoying the views of the incoming lightning storm not thinking of the danger.
And then it struck me....
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 06 2018
Have you seen the movie about the dangers of smoking?
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︎ Nov 09 2017
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︎ Oct 31 2015
There should be a Network Television show to inform teens about the dangers of unprotected sex.
They can call it "Genital Hospital".
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︎ Jul 24 2017
I'm starting a new hip hop group that raps about the dangers of psychedelic drugs
It's going to be called "Run-DMT"
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︎ Sep 29 2017
π︎ 3
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︎ Mar 03 2016
The Secret Service no longer yell "Get down" when the President is in danger...
They yell "Donald, duck!"
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︎ Mar 18 2017
So I was talking to my mom about the dangers of constipation
Me: You know, constipation has killed people.
Dad: Yeah, but those people just don't give a shit!
sigh
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︎ Oct 25 2014
Oliver was in danger...
A dad with his last son Oliver were in danger
Dad told Oliver to hide and then he told him
"I'll pick you up when it's oliver"
.
.
.
I'm actually sorry for that pun
I know it was terrible
I'll see myself out
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︎ Feb 24 2015
I tried to warn my now deceased son about the dangers of Russian roulette...
It went in one ear and out of the other.
π︎ 14
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︎ Nov 13 2020
Great, just got kicked out of the karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone five times.
Apparently I exceeded the maximum number of attempted Loggins.
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︎ Apr 25 2020
I just got kicked out of Karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a rowβ¦
They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts.
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︎ Apr 06 2017
I just got kicked out of karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a row...
They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts...
π︎ 2k
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︎ Oct 13 2017
Just got kicked out of a karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone 5 times...
Apparently I exceeded the amount of Loggins attempts.
π︎ 65
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︎ Feb 06 2019
I was kicked out of the karaoke bar for singing Highway To The Danger Zone 3 times in a row.
Too many Loggins attempts I guess.
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︎ Jun 18 2019
I just got kicked out of a karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone five times
I guess I exceeded the maximum number of Loggins attemps.
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 25 2019
Just got kicked out of karaoke for singing Danger Zone three times in a row ...
... they said it was too many Loggins attempts.
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︎ Oct 13 2015
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