I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Pour produire du cannabis, il faut beaucoup de choses. Du talent, des ressources, de l’énergie, de la passion… et des valeurs.
Alexandre Gauthier, le maitre-cultivateur d’Origine Nature, partage les valeurs qui animent son entreprise et explique comment elles dictent un partage des informations qui part du bas pour remonter vers le haut.
Un peu comme l’énergie qui se trouve dans les racines avant de monter vers les fleurs…
Bonne écoute!
Huge shoutout to u/jaylemi for giving me his seal of approval to bring back Waiver Wire Warriors. All player ownership percentages are derived from Yahoo. Players who are less than 80% rostered are only featured and the stats are from the last 14 days.
Hey how's it going everyone, it's been a while since I've posted so I hope y'all are doing well.
For today, I'll be doing something a little different. There won't be a weekly preview from me this week but you can check out the one that u/Phan_ created by clicking here.
I know some of you nerds are in super deep leagues so instead of writing up about 25 players, I created this table to help you guys see who has been the most productive over the last 14 days. I've included categories, such as +/-, PIM, and SHO for those whose leagues are counting those categories. I've also included SH% to help you guys determine whose goal production will be sustainable.
For those who have been following me for the last year, I'm sorry. I know y'all know I'm a big believer in quality content but sacrificing quality for quantity will allow me to help out as many people as I can, whether if they're playing in a deep or shallow league. The issue with writing up 25 players is that they're usually gone by the time you open up your fantasy app. But with +200 players, you'll have a ton of options. Let me know what you think of this idea!
Other than that, I hope this will help y'all! As always, if you have any questions, reach out via the comments/PM or on Twitter @vizionsnaps. School's been really busy and I know I haven't really been active so if it's urgent, just DM me.
Thank you guys for the support, appreciate it as always! If you want to buy me a coffee and help out with my studying, feel free to do so clicking on the link below! <3
https://www.buymeacoffee.com/vizionsnaps
Skaters
| % | Player | Position | Team | Status | G | A | P | +/- | PIM | PPP | SOG | SH% | FW | HIT | BLK |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 79% | Mikhail Sergachev | C | TBL | D3/PP2 | 0 | 5 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 8 | 0.0% | 0 | 11 | 10 |
| 79% | Teuvo Teravainen | LW/RW | CAR | L1/PP1 | 0 | 4 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 1 | 15 | 0.0% | 2 | 3 | 5 |
| 78% | Jordan Kyrou | C/LW/RW | STL | L3/PP1 | 3 | 3 | 6 | -3 | 0 | 1 | 16 | 18.8% | 0 | 1 | 3 |
| 78% | Moritz Seider | D | DET | D1 /PP1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | -7 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 0.0% | 0 | 8 | 19 |
| 77% | Devon Toews | D | COL | D1/PP2 | 1 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 1 | 13 | 7.7% | 0 | 7 | 4 |
| 77% | Tomas Hertl | C/LW | SJS | L2/PP2 | 2 | 1 | 3 | -2 | 2 | 0 | 14 | 14.3% | 57 |
Do your worst!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
They’re on standbi
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
[Removed]
Where ever you left it 🤷♀️🤭
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
You take away their little brooms
It was about a weak back.
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
