Clever Tie Dye Puns

So my boyfriend and I went camping this weekend at a campground, and we met this couple and their son (maybe 7-11 years old, idk I’m bad at telling kids ages) while we were setting up our tent and they were setting up at the plot next to ours. We had some polite small talk and we mentioned that we bought a tie-dye kit to tie-dye a couple t-shirts while we were there. It was really just a small cheap tie dye kit and we both brought 2 shirts to make. The mother immediately got excited and said her son would LOVE to tie dye with us later that night. We were caught off guard but I was sure there’d be some extra dye and I didn’t really care that much, so I said sure. A few hours of hiking and fishing go by and then we’re ready to go back and settle into our campsite, eat dinner and start making our t-shirts. We round the corner towards camp and it was as if this kid was waiting for us, he was right at the path and then sprinted back to his campsite. Once we got closer his mother stomped over to the trail, and this is how this conversation went:

EM- “Where have you guys been? We’ve waited hours!”

Me- “Uh we’ve been hiking but he can come use it in a little bit once we set it up”

I was totally caught off guard and turned off that she even approached me that way but I blew it off again. Like did this lady expect me to alter my plans all day to cater to her kid? We get to our campsite and I’m about to start dinner but this woman and her kid are just staring at us, so I decide to just get the dye ready so he can bring his stupid t-shirt over and leave us alone so we can eat in peace. I bring the dye out and they come over to our table, empty handed-

EM- “Looks great! He’s a small or a medium”

Me- “What? I don’t have anything for him to use. I thought you had your own t-shirt that you wanted to dye”

EM- “NO! YOU are the ones who brought the tie-dye kit! We waited ALL day for you to get back, and now you’re saying you don’t even have a t-shirt for him?”

Me- “I don’t know what to tell you. We only have 4 t-shirts to make for ourselves.”

EM- “I can’t believe you told (son) that he could tie dye and got his hopes up! He waited for you ALL DAY! Can he have one of yours?”

Me- “Absolutely not” I said while laughing

EM- “It’s not funny! Don’t laugh at me!”

At that point I’m just like whatever lady and we keep snickering at her until they storm back to their campsite, where she starts playing literal death metal music full blast. It’s hilarious. This chick was INS

Went to a garage sale. The lady running the sale was wearing a rainbow tie dye tshirt that said "PROUD" on it in big letters. My mom and I bought a big lawn chair. She said "my wife will help you load that into your car." A woman whose picture you can find in the dictionary next to the word "butch" came over and put the chair in our car. When we left, I said something along the lines of "oh what a nice lesbian couple" to my mom and she said "I'm not sure they're lesbians."

Girl what are they then????? That's a woman with a wife??????

(yes they could also be bi/pan/etc-sexual but that is. not what she meant.)

I may or may not have gone overboard when making my latest batch of tie dye t-shirts. Now I have far too many and there’s no way I can wear all of them, even with a wardrobe change twice a day.

So I’m giving them away for free. I’ve got three boxes of shirts on my parent’s porch, ranging from XX-S, to XXX-L. Don’t ask why there’s such a range in sizes. It’s too complicated to explain.

Please come and grab a shirt or two. My dad is going absolutely spare because I accidentally tie dyed the good dinner table cloth and apparently his boss is coming over for dinner tonight. If he sees any more tie dye he will probably disown me.

It's ugly. A literal eyesore. I'm so sorry to anyone who likes tie-dye, but I HATE IT AND I WISH IT NEVER EXISTED. I have no idea why anybody likes it, and I'm pretty sure that people only wear it because they either went to summer camp (and they feel like everyone has to look at their cUsTOM mADe t-shirt to know such), or they can't let go of the 70s.

Regardless, my hate for tie-dye continues, and I'm convinced that it's comeback is a literal regression of society. We would all be better off without it. End tie-dye in 2021. Please.

The above description is my favorite aesthetic. If you have any tarot deck recommendations that fall under this description (or oracle decks too!) I would love to hear them!! Thank you so much in advance!