Why were there no fighting games under the Christmas tree?

They got Tekken

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Star Wars Puns

From movie puns we provide you the funniest collection of Star Wars puns

What do you call 5 siths piled on top of a lightsaber? A Sith-Kabob!


Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns? So it doesn’t Hang Solow!


Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda for money? Because he’s always a little short


What program do Jedi use to view PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi


What do you call the website Chewbacca started that gives out Empire secrets? Wookieeleaks


What do you call a Jedi in denial? Obi-Wan Cannot Be


Where does Princess Leia go shopping for clothing? At the Darth Maul


Greg: Which Star Wars character travels around the world? Craig: Who? Greg: Globi-wan Kenobi!


Matthew: What does a Star Destroyer wear to a wedding? Daniel: What? Matthew: Bow ties, of course!


Deen Why was the droid angry? Mark: Why? Deen People kept pushing its buttons.


Luke: Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road? Lei Not sure. Luke: To get to the Dark Side.


Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas. Luke: How do you know? Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.


What do Whipids say when they kiss? Ouch.


What is a jedi’s favorite toy? A yo-yoda


What do you call a pirate droid? Argh2-D2


Where does Jabba the Hutt eat? Pizza Hutt


What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name? “The” Why is Han Solo a loner? Because he’s solo.


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi What do you call a Sith who won’t fight? A Sithy.


What time is it when Darth Vader steps on your chronometer? Time to get a new chronometer.


What do you call a pirate droid? Arrrrgh-2-D2


Which side of a wookie has the most hair? The outside.


Where does Jabba eat dinner? Pizza Hutt


Who do Jedi call to help open PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call someone that tries to be a Jedi? Obi-Wannabe


What do you call a bounty hunter from Alabama? Bubba Fett


What time is it when Jabba the Hutt sits on your blaster? Time to get a new blaster! Why is Luke


Skywalker always invited on picnics? He always has the forks with him.


Which imperial officer hated Thanksgiving? Grand Moff Turkeyn


What do you call stormtroopers playing Monopoly? Game of Clones


Why did

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👤︎ u/Punsville
📅︎ May 04 2017
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FWD: Fwd: FWD FWD: Fwd: Emails from Dad

MAN LAWS

The International Rules of Manhood

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.

(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.

(c) After wrecking your boss' car.

(d) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding

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