My dad had a Christmas ornament of Elvis dressed as an Angel on his tree. I asked my Dad why little angel Elvis wasn’t wearing any pants. He replied:

Because he died on the toilet

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jvanzandd
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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What do angels sing during Christmas time?

No Hell, No Hell!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrazyCosmonaut
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
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An angel walks into a hardware store and says "I'd like to buy a Christmas tree."

The cashier asks "are you putting it up yourself?"

The angel replies "yes."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RancidLemons
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2016
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It's Christmas morning and Mariah Carey wakes up to see what her boyfriend got her this year.

She opens the front door and there is a huge log on a chain contraption that can ram castle gates.Β  Confused, she looks past the medieval device to see her boyfriend standing in the front yard surrounded by dozens of male sheep and holding two tickets to skybox seats for football in Los Angeles.

He holds his arms wide and asks, "what do you think?"

She smiles and says, "Thank you for the rams but all I want for Christmas is ewe."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcsestretch
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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