Chef Boy Hardee
Because he is Fe-male
It runs in your jeans
When it has a child.
Alright, alright. The truth is. . .
Carl: Dad stop. Dad: It was Chewy, Carl...
He was good at finding solutions to inequalities.
Carl had this calling card of his. When he was nearly done burgling a house, he would put a brick inside the victim's washing machine, and switch it on. The washing machine would destroy itself, and the owners would know that the perpetrator could only be Carl.
Carl's number eventually came up, when he burgled a house with three savage guard dogs. They put an end to his burglary career.
I guess you could say, washing machines live longer with Carl gone.
along with nearly 900 by Carl Philipp Emanuel Bach, nearly 400 by Johann Christian Bach, more than 300 by Johann Christoph Friedrich Bach, and nearly 200 by Wilhelm Friedemann Bach.
Together with as many as 200 more surviving compositions by other members of the Bach dynasty, scholars estimate that about 3 000 works are preserved in total, a collection that we today know as the Baroque Bach mountain.
"I can, sir...."
Wrong! Car accident.
Cause he's Dolittle now.
... make sure you are looking left and right, NOT up and down.
but now he is going to Dolittle
Note: RDJ Dolittle movie trailer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEf412bSPLs
You'd be truly passing down your genes.
A stroke of genius.
... we'd be calling him 'Ferrous Bueller.'
Carles
Him: "You know what they call me back home,right?" Me:"What?" Him:"Carl."
Cause he's Moody
:|He sure loved his Cosmos.
When Downey got the role, they had to change the movie title to Iron Man instead of Ferrous Bueller's Day Off.
because all proper-tea is theft.
Doesn't he have people to do that for him?
It was making him Moody.
Then he woke up.
A street walker
He said, "So now you can tell everyone your Saab story."
It was an automated phone system which said, "Press 1 for the money, 2 for the show…"
She wanted to speak with the management of Isengard.
Contestant: I'm going the sing Somewhere Over The Rainbow. Harry Connick Jr: I think you should sing here.
Pets I want to have....
An otter name Harry Otter. A snake named Severus Snake. A tortoise named Voldetort. A chicken named Kylo Hen. A dog named Barkamedes. A deer named David Hasselhoof. A turkey named Green Gobbleen. A cat named Captain Ameowrica. A stork named Tony Stork. A pig named Peter Porker. A crocodile named Croctor Strange. A duck named Ducktor Doom. A squid named Abraham Inkin. A goose named Ryan Gooseling. A heron named Charlize Heron. A goat named Selena Goatmez An alpaca named Alpacachino. A carp name Leonardo Di’Carprio. A tuna named Tuna Turner. A horse named Neighlor Swift. A toad named Demi Lavatoad. A Rhino named Ryan Rhinolds. A swan named Swan Jovi. A Falcon named Jimmy Falcon. A ferret named Ferret Faucet. A rabbit named Hoptimus Prime. A cow named Moolissa McCarthy. A crow named Seth Crowgan. A fox named Charlie Fox. A cat named Katy Purry. A wolf named Howly Berry. A hamster named Scarlet Johamster. A parrot named Squakin Phoenix. A duck named DuckleBerry Finn. A canary named Jim Canary. A swarm of bees, all named Beeyoncé. A sheep named Meryl Sheep. An elk named Elkton John. A bear named Teddy Mercury. A ram named Gordon RAMsey. A shark named Fin Diesel. A jellyfish named Jelly Clarkson. An Iguana named Eddie Lizard. A hyena named Hyena Bonham Carter. A penguin named Robird Downey Jr.
a ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Not really a joke, but it sure made me laugh.
A few days ago I was working on an essay about Harriet Tubman. I finished it Wednesday night and left it in the kitchen overnight. At some point during the nighttime my father erased one of my sentences. It was something like, "New York responded to this incident with outrage, with most sympathizing with Tubman over her economic hardships."
He replaced it with, "Harriet Tubman wrote the first draft of the film The Parent Trap on the back of a Carls Jr. sandwich wrapper." I didn't check the paper before turning it in.
My teacher was not amused.
