Canford School Puns

Yep, it’s exactly what it sounds like. I’m taking the first letter of the university’s name and the first letter of the mascot name and switching them to see what happens. Why? I don’t know.

A few ground rules:

• If a team’s mascot and college first letter are the same, I’ll switch the first two letters, if still the same the next three, and so on.

• Mascots/colleges that start with vowels will not lose the vowel when the other letter is added. For example Texas A&M Aggies will go to “Taggies”, not Tggies.

• If a mascot/college has, say a “Ch” at the start, and the other one has, say an L, I can swap two letters for one so one thing doesn’t become Lh and is unpronounceable. For example the Bellarmine Knights will become the Knellarmine Bights, not the Kellarmine Bnights.

• If a team 2 words in its mascot/college, only the first letter of the first word will be switched. However, if both have 2, both will be switched. For example, Texas Tech Red Raiders would switch both the “Texas” & “Tech” and both “Red” & “Raiders”.

• St.’s and commons abbreviations like CSU will be ignored.

That should be everything. So without further ado, here we go!

ASUN

Knellarmine Bights

Bentral Arkansas Cears

Castern Kentucky Eolonels

Elorida Gulf Coast Feagles

Dacksonville Jolphins

Gacksonville St. Jamecocks

Oennesaw State Kowls

Fiberty Lames

Bipscomb Lisons

Lorth Alabama Nions

Oorth Florida Nospreys

Hetson Statters

America East

Dalbany Great Aanes

Benghamton Biarcats

Hawtford Harks (almost the same, cool)

Baine Black Mears

Hew Jersey Institute of Technology Nighlanders

Wew Hampshire Nildcats

Seony Brook Stawolves

Raryland Baltimore-County Metrievers

Rassachussets Howell Miver Lawks

Cermont Vatamounts

American

Bincinnati Cearcats

Past Carolina Eirates

Couston Hougars

Temphis Migers

Mouthern Methodist Sustangs

Bouth Florida Sulls

Oemple Towls

Grulane Teen Wave

Gulsa Tolden Hurricane

Knentral Florida Cights

Shichita State Wockers

Atlantic 10

Wavidson Dildcats

Flayton Dyers

Dukuesne Duqes (almost the same too)

Rordham Fams

Peorge Mason Gatriots

Ceorge Washington Golonials

Ea Salle Lexplorers

Rode Island Rhams (literally the same)

Spichmond Riders

St. Hoseph’s Jawks

St. Bouis Lillikens

St. Bonnaventure Bonies (skeleton gang)

Missachusstes Manutemen

Rirginia Commonwealth Vams

ACC

Eoston College Beagles

Temson Cligers

Bluke Due Devils

Slorida State Feminoles

Yeorgia Jech Gellow T

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And now I’m cannelloni

And boy are my arms legs.

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

When I got home, they were still there.

Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.

I won't be doing that today!

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

[Removed]

And then shook his arm really fast.

(True story, please groan with me.)