Bosch! Strumpets forward, Kiki Fistup gets it full on...
It was a cold, damp night in west Yorkshire that greeted a record crowd of 36 to the Calderdale & District Municiple Field, as the Strumpets hosted the Lesbos in a mid-table clash that has yielded 2 own goals in the last seven meetings of these two giants of the WSL. The Strumpets were coming off the back of several draws whilst the Lesbos had won one in their last five. As WSL games go, it doesn’t get better than this.
The game started with the usual taking of the knee, which saw several racists repent and one sexist shout ‘while you’re down there, love’. After a small scuffle, she was ejected and the game began.
Right from kick-off the game sprung into life with a speculative effort from the halfway line by Lesbos’ captain, Brenda Imadyke. Unfortunately, she skewed it terribly and it bobbled harmlessly towards the corner flag. All 20 outfield players let out a ferocious shriek and raced towards the ball and a giant melee ensued. They were then quickly joined by both goalkeepers which cranked up the tension to fever pitch. Unfortunately, the ball had no idea what to do and just cannoned off flailing boots and heaving bosoms until eventually pinging itself free to the opposite end of the field. It took a while for the players to notice as they carried on kicking out at anything that moved until the referee blew and pointed them in the right direction. Again, all 22 players shrieked their way to the ball where another giant melee ensued.
This set the tone for an absorbing game which saw neither side dominate and neither open goal threatened. Just before half-time, Strumpet’s centre-half, Kara Chubbyflaps had to be replaced by Steph Right- Goodfinger as Kara’s recurring stomach cramps that have blighted her season returned. Both sides must have been glad to hear the half-time whistle as the constant thrashing around had taken its toll on both sided.
The teams returned un-changed for the second-half, and quickly settled into the same high tempo melee fest that saw out the first. Lesbos’ midfielder, Catia Clitlick, was the first into the book with an unwarranted, catty remark about Strumpet forward, Billie Beanflick’s arse. The ref soon waved away Clitlick’s protestations that it was ‘blob week’ and a quick flash of the red soon saw her back down.
As the game me
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Are there any junior doctors that have done their rotations in these hospitals? Happy to hear any comments!
With how close Leeds is, we are gonna be next.
