Calder Cannons Puns

Let's do this! Night two!

The second and subsequent rounds of the 2021 AFL Draft will be held at Marvel Stadium, Melbourne on Thursday, 25th November 2021 at 19:00 AEDT

PLEASE NOTE: the first round was held last night (see the live thread), the Pre-season Draft (if held) and Rookie Draft will be held tomorrow, Friday, 26th November at 3pm AEDT.

# SECOND ROUND

#THIRD ROUND

#FOURTH ROUND

I absolutely love Cradle and am excited for its next books. The series was such an unexpected delight that I thought I would try one of Will's other series and was fascinated to hear that several of them are technically connected through "the way" and the multiverse of iterations guarded by the Abidan. I recently read and finished "Of Shadow and Sea" because the dueling plot lines structure of the series sounded very intriguing.

Unfortunately, I did not enjoy "Of Shadow and Sea" at all. In fact it was a struggle for me to even finish towards the end as I became more and more frustrated with how the story was playing out. The whole book felt like a massive drop in story telling quality compared to Cradle.

At this point, I'm going to rant about why I didn't enjoy the book, so people can better understand my opinion and provide more nuanced reasoning as to whether I should continue the series or not. If you don't care to hear my silly opinions but still want to give advice, feel free to skip to the end!

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I did not relate to or enjoy any of the main characters. I never once felt like Shera was in real danger or in significant personal pain or struggle. She was always completely confident, better than everyone else from the very beginning of the book, and became even more unnecessarily OP at the end without seemingly any effort or intention on her part. Her only relatable quality and singular motivation was that she liked to sleep a lot, which got old real quick. Maya's personality was super flat and as much as the book liked to talk about her "drawbacks" they never seemed to actually impact a single scene in a meaningful way. It was crazy to me that Shera's biggest reaction to watching Maya's body stitch it self back together from a massive axe wound through the chest was effectively "Maya couldn't talk for like two minutes while healing herself from near death, glad I don't have to deal with that "drawback". Lucan was talked up so much about being a highly moral and caring person, but the first and only time his character has any agency in the book, he explicitly decides not to help the woman trapped in the cell next to him, which eventually leads to her death (assuming she doesn't come back in a later book since we never actually saw her die in this book). Yes obviously releasing the enemy prisoner would be a tactically dumb move, but my point is th

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Hello and welcome all to the 2021 AFL Draft Guide, provided entirely by /u/PM_ME_YOUR_BANGERS (absolute melon fwiw). As trade period wraps up and everyone turns into draft experts for a month and a half, I'm here to help you get the leg up on your mates/ family/ colleagues/ supporter forums when it comes to draft discussion.

(quick FAQ)

What makes PM_ME_YOUR_BANGERS qualified

Not much, but what makes any of us qualified!

What's next years draft like

Next years draft is ALWAYS better, remember that, and if you feel someone has the upper hand in a draft discussion this is your 'get out of jail free' card, simply respond with "Ah well, I'm not all that invested this year, next years draft looks much better"

What are the topics that I need to weigh in on

The main topic this year is of course Jason Horne-Francis vs Nick Daicos, both being exemplary players and stand outs of the draft, but one has to be better! Nick is a Collingwood Father-son prospect which is why this debate is so important, are the Kangaroos really getting the best kid in the draft with their wooden spoon? That's for you to weigh in on, if you are PRO Jason Horne-Francis, your main points are;

• Playing against men all year, debuted at 17 in the SANFL league

• Stronger contested game

If you are PRO Nick Daicos, your main points are;

• Accumulates over 30 disposals in pretty much every game he's played, averaging 2 goals a game as a midfielder

• Was better against Geelong VFL than Jason Horne-Francis

Anything else worth noting

NGA prospects can't have their bids matched inside the top 20 picks, however Northern Academy prospects such as GWS's Josh Fahey CAN, this is a common mistake and if you mention it you will have the upper hand in draft discussions. To go with this, Metropolitan based NGA prospects from SA or WA can't be matched within the top 40, so Fremantle's Jesse Motlop falls into this category, another upper hand fact.

Remember when in Draft Discussions, if someone counters your point on a particular player or says they prefer another, with the lack of National Championships these past two years, another 'get out of jail free' card to pull out is 'Yeah but after the first few picks everything's pretty blurry', this is a royal flush, no one can counter this as you can respond 'how can you be sure of anything without a full championships?'

The Players

A key part of any draft is the players, below is the draft combine invitee list

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

You take away their little brooms

There hasn't been a post all year!

Here's a table of each roster listed player from the Binghamton Senators 2011 Calder Cup winning run. Didn't spend a lot of time researching what each inactive player is doing.

Where ever you left it 🤷‍♀️🤭

It was about a weak back.

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)