Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ebkbk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson… He said, β€œBut dad, your name is Brian.” I said, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. /r/Weekness/comments/erz6…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jpurvisturton
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
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I keep mispelling my friend brians name brain he gets super mad which is out of character

I didn't think he'd really mind

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAtheistFish
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2018
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I want to buy a second NBA team in Miami.

At the press conference, when they ask me what the team name is, I’ll say, β€œit’s not the Heat. It’s the Humidity.”

(Credit to Brian Regan)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Munger88
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
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The award for the best dadjokes 2018 goes to...

… u/ebkbk for this post: Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. made on 24.11. with 38.9k upvotes

[also already made by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes]

Let's move on to the top 3 of each month:

January:

  1. Is this sub still active? by u/I_Fart_Liquids on 01.01. with 36.4k upvotes

  2. Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine by u/daugarten on 20.01. with 30.8k upvotes

  3. An open letter to the mods of r/dadjokes: by u/Alfie_13 on 27.01. with 18.9k upvotes

February:

  1. Was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm. by u/jakeisbill on 05.02. for 20.3k upvotes

  2. My daughter asked me what I'm posting on Reddit... by u/madazzahatter on 25.02. for 18.3k upvotes

  3. When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding. by u/ownworldman on 23.02. for 17.7k upvotes

March:

  1. I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth, we can read maps backwards!" and I thought... by u/madazzahatter on 21.03. for 22.2k upvotes

  2. Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes.

  3. [When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.](https://www.reddit.com/r/da

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Skormes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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A short collection of fresh puns.

Most of this is my own work, if not, it was inspired by something clever!
I hope this will tickle your funnybone and produce a jolly good set of laughs.

A guy didn't register that the wet paint signs about the handrail was still drying, his hand immediately stuck to the rail. My only response to him was, well you see there, it's an application problem, not hardware.

A researcher's obsession with mixing sand, stones, lime and water has started to yield concrete results.

Eyeglass makers who profit well can frame their success.

Joe: I gave the backyard squirrels Christmas presents!
Abby: Are you nuts?
Joe: No, that's what I gave them...

What did the supervisor at the tortilla factory say at the end of a long workday?
That's a wrap!

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare. (Insp)

People who don't answer the phone sometimes miss their calling in life.

His words were heavy, but his friends didn't get the gravity of the situation.

Time flies like crazy!
Fruit flies like apples!

Never let logic and reasoning get in the way of telling a good story. (Sounds like something that would be said on TopGear/Grand Tour)

There are a few words that will open many doors for you in life - Push and Pull (Insp)

Somehow people really don't like it when I throw lamps at them to encourage them to lighten up.
Same goes for tossing handles for when they need to get a grip or soap for cleaning up their act.

When you're on the ballot for the water council and they have a runoff election.

Ghosts speak latin, it's a dead language (Insp)

If you work at a grocery, send the interns down to the meat market to get some red herrings.

There was a river in Egypt that no one believed existed, it was known locally as De-Nile.

Bad luck Brian - Invests in uranium, profits decay.

There was an explosion at the film manufacturing company, reporters say the story is still developing.

Why do bagpipers walk around?
To get away from the noise (Insp)

Most people have a six-figure income, just the decimal point is in the wrong place.

It has recently been discovered that scientific research causes cancer in rats.

In Russia, the term road has had a controversial meaning for a very long time.

In Canada/Russia, you put things in the fridge to warm them up.

Did you know that the creator of Barbie was named Barbara Dahl?

Doc: There's something not q

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/techtornado
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2017
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Today my son asked β€œCan I have a book mark?” And I burst into tears. 15 years and he still doesn’t know my names Brian.

[removed]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson… He said, β€œBut dad, your name is Brian.” I said, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”
πŸ‘︎ 71
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JackTMJones
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson. He said, β€œBut dad, your name is Brian.”

I replied, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/digitalsadia
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
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When I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson, he looked quizzically at me and said, β€œBut your name is Brian...”

I exclaimed, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2018
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Today, my son asked, β€œCan I have a bookmark?”

I burst into tears. 12 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2021
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears...

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/csgo_Kriptonas
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
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A man says to his son:

"Did you know I was named after George Washington?"

Son: "but Dad... Your name is Brian?"

Dad: "I know, but I was named after George Washington."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Assfrontation
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
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Oh hi Mark

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/inviktusmaneo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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My son came up to me and asked:

"Can I have a book mark" I burst out in tears, he's 11 years old and can't remember that my name is Brian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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Dad: I was named after Thomas Jefferson

Son: But dad your name is Brian Dad: I know but I was named after him

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingTheo75520
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
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Today my son asked "can i have a book mark?" I burst into tears.

He is 11 years old and still doesn't know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Whymustudodat
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can i have a book mark?" And i burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesnt know my name is Brian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RussiaIsMyCity
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson…

He said, β€œBut dad, your name is Brian.” I said, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”

πŸ‘︎ 804
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thepattato
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson…

He said, β€œBut dad, your name is Brian.”

I said, β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2017
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Today, my sons asked if he could have a book mark.

I burst into tears. After 10 years he still does’t know my name is Brian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robindc_93
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a bookmark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?"
  1. and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrKrabs7382
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?"

I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/asmodeuscactus
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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My son asked "Can I have a book mark?"

Its been 10 years and he still doesnt know my name is Brian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TJPancaker
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
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My son

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Averagegloomer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
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Today, my son asked "can I have a book mark?" And I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian!

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MemeMakso
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mora_kylkee
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/virulentt_music
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
.......

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Danbroi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?"

and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RobRoy333
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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Today my son asked "can I have a book mark?" and I bursted out laughing

11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
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Today my son asked, β€œCan I have a book mark?”

I burst into tears. 12 years old and still doesn’t know my name is Brian.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sohamnshah
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report

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