Boxing Food Puns

I told her “No I would rather wrestle for it”.

Dad: No thanks, but I’ll wrestle you for them.

I said you dont want these hands son.

Dad: No. But I'll wrestle you for it!

Did you hear about the red-headed cookie that broke it’s leg?

Gingersnap

Did you hear about the cookie that quietly laughs at other cookies’ drawings?

Snickerdoodle

Did you hear about the dessert that got cast in the bakery’s reboot of Indiana Jones: The Temple of Doom?

Shortbread

Did you hear about the friends the zombies are making in heaven?

Angel food

Did you hear about the Mushroom Kingdom princess that abdicated the throne to pursue the shoe repair trade?

Peach cobbler

Did you hear about the 49th state in the Union legalizing recreational marijuana?

Baked Alaska

Did you hear about the Bavarian teacher that filled up her blackboard every day?

German chocolate

Did you hear about the hip New York hotspots for citrus fruits?

Lemon bars

Did you hear about the mother's sister that really likes her nieces and nephews?

Fondant

Did you hear about people wagering money on a boxing match in the Arctic between a heavyweight champ and raspberries?

Sherbet

Me: 'It's not worth fighting over'

Me, pointing at his food: Wanna box for that?

Random dad: No, but I’ll wrestle you for it.

If I go out to eat with my dad and we have any leftovers, I know every time what's going to happen.

Waiter/Waitress: "You want a box for that?" (Sounds like "You wanna box for that?")

Dad: Raises fists into traditional boxing pose "I think I can take you."

Lol, on last year's Valentine's day my best friend had got mad at me for not asking my crush out.

We'd planned on going to McDonald's together because he didn't have a date either. When I arrived at McDonald's this f*cker was holding a cardboard box with a terrified look and when he saw me he immediately gave me the box and told me he'd already bought the food and that we better take the bus to my place. I just thought he probably was joking or something because the box didn't even have any kind of decoration, it even had a chips brand printed on it, but as we got to the bus and sat I felt something moving inside, I thought maybe it was a puppy or something, but why did he look scared of it?

So, we get to my house, I go to my backyard, where my then 7yo beagle was and I open the box. I could only see a black blur flying out of it and then heard my best friend scream. It was a rooster. He's terrified of birds. And weirdest of all it was a fully grown rooster but he was super tiny, like 10 inches tall tiny.

I asked him wtf was going on and he just kinda hid behind the backyard door and said "I bought it so that you could get some cock tonight". I always make puns and he hates them, I was speechless. So long story short I now own 6 chickens and 4 roosters (my mom got super mad at him for buying the rooster, but then she got super attached and bought him a chicken, when she laid eggs she let them hatch, the rooster's name is Enrique btw, my mom even made him a birthday party and all last week, lol)

... He didn't finish all of his food

Waiter: "Do you want a box for your meal?"

Dad: "No, I'd rather wrestle, boxing is too violent"

My dad is the king of dadjokes, especially in public. His specialty is bantering with waitresses. The other day we were finishing dinner at a restaurant, and dad still had quite a bit of food on his plate. The waitress came up and said, "Do you wanna box?" to which he replied, "No, but we could wrestle a few rounds." :)

[Mom, dad, SO, I eating Chinese food before Billy Joel concert]

[Finishing up, dad notices bunch of fortune cookies left in the box to be thrown out]

Dad: "You gonna throw all these away?"

Mom: "...are you gonna eat all of them?"

Me: "No reason to throw them out, they're worth a fortune.........."

.......It sounded much better before I typed it all out, I hope it comes across as good as it did that night.

I'm a college kid that works fast food part time to pay the bills. However, I managed to get two of my friends jobs there aswell, and our manager is pretty cool. So we have good times there and it's never quiet.

Anyway, I was bagging up an order, and my manager thought it would be funny to follow me and tell me exactly how to do everything; open the bag, put the box in the bag, receipt in the bag, blah blah blah and so on. Once I had handed out the order, she was like,

"Alright job, thanks to me".

I responded,

"Oh yeah you were great. They should promote you to micromanager."

Got a good laugh out of everybody, and it will be on my life's highlight reel if I have anything to say about it

When someone doesn't finish their food. The waiter/waitress inevitably asks,"You wanna' box for that?" To which my dad responds, "no, but I'll wrestle yah for it!"

My roommate got a care package from his mother who sent him various odds and ends from his old place and some food that she made herself.

Roomate: "Whoa, sweet, she packed in some Jams too. Look, there's strawberry, apple, mango and blackberry."

Me: "So you're saying that box was jam-packed?"

Whenever the server would ask my dad for a box for left over food, he would reply with "No but I'll wrestle you for it"

Dad: "Once I got in a fight at a restaurant." Son: "How?!" Dad: "The waitress asked if I wanted a box for my food..."

We were getting ready to cook some food for the family gathering we had today, and my mom pulls my dads camouflage apron out of a box. It had some writing on it but it was hard to read because of the color. She says to me, "I can't even see this." In which I reply, "WELL IT IS CAMOFLAGE!"

And that was the groan heard round the world.

Dad and I would be innocently walking around the food store and happen upon the prepared foods aisle when he would notice the Hamburger Helper boxes. He'd laugh to himself, just thinking about the lame joke he always tells before it even comes out of his mouth.

"What do you call a masturbating cow?!"

Normally the way a joke works is you wait for someone to interact with you, answer your question or at least acknowledge that you're telling a joke - not my dad. He yells at himself at the top of his lungs.

"BEEF STROGANOFF!! ...MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Really loudly. Way louder than any person should ever speak indoors. ..I miss him.

I told her I’d rather wrestle her for it instead

No, but I’ll wrestle you for it.

Waitress: "Would you like to box your food?"

Dad: "No, but I'll wrestle you for the check"