My wife couldn’t believe I took my old high school bully out tonight.
I had mono in high school. I went to the doctor today with similar symptoms but two times worse...
Back in my day, high school sports athletic conferences wouldn’t let you participate if you didn’t keep at least a 2.0 grade point average. It seems times have drastically changed...
I just heard about 20,000 leagues under the C!
If I was a smart but unscrupulous high school student, I would start a business doing other kids' homework for a nominal fee.
The name of the business?
"Nerdy deeds, done dirt cheap"
This was at my high school
My high school bully still takes my lunch money.
But on the upside, he makes great Subway sandwiches!
A high school girl was on her way home from a party, got knockout drunk, and shat on herself and all over her friends.
She was a real party pooper
Music puns sometimes hit the high notes
My wife asked me if I experimented with sex and drugs when I was in high school.
I said, “Yes, but I was part of the control group.”
Every time I lie down on my new bed, all the embarrassing moments from high school come flooding back to me.
I shouldn’t have bought the repressed memory foam mattress.
Thought y’all might enjoy these illustrated puns I found on the back of my English lit class notes from high school 🙃
My mom played the clarinet in high school. She mentioned she wanted to play again, but doesn't have the money to waste on it. I ordered one for her birthday and left her a subtle clue.
My wife told me today, "Look, I've had this since high school and it still fits me."
Me: "Yeah!!! It's a scarf. "
Recent studies have shown that roughly 80% of goth girls in our country's high schools enjoy reading parenting magazines.
Strangely enough, they mostly only read the daddy issues.
When I was in high school in Belleville, ON, a young local artist spray-painted a beautiful picture on a large concrete wall under a bridge by the Moira river. He didn't get permission to do this, however, and the city eventually painted over it.
Watching his picture go like that must've been pretty demuralizing.
Why princess ariel didn't finish high school?
Because her grades were always under the C.
Back in high school my Shakespeare Club have me an award
I was voted most likely To.Be
It’s not that my high school math teacher was mean...
When my kid graduates high school I want him to go to Indiana for college.
Then I can have a “Hoosier Daddy” bumper sticker.
How do crabs get to school?
They use the side walk!
- came up with this while walking to work today (I work in education)*
I had a crush in high school...
Dad drives to the local high school and picks up his son.
Son: “Dad, put me down, you’re embarrassing me.”
Why did the man get sent back to his home country for following his high school girlfriends life rules?
My 11 y.o. son getting ready for school: Why do you always keep your snowman happy?
So he doesn't have a meltdown.
Definitely not how you want to get to school
I remember having rocks thrown at me because I was a nerd in high school.
As they hit me, I thought, “that’s not gneiss.”
The only thing I learned in high school was how to multiply...
and I have eleven kids to prove it.
High school started out promising for me, but I ended up selling meat as a job.
I guess you can say I butchered my grades.
I wrote a card for my friend who just graduated high school and wants to study geology and/or paleontology in college. She also likes puns :)
High but not so high IQ meme
I had a girlfriend in high school that I dumped when I found out she was missing a toe on her left foot...
I guess that makes me lack-toes intolerant.
My chemistry book from high school... I was bored.
The school phoned me today and said, "Your son's has been telling lies. "
I replied, "Tell him, he's bloody good. I don't have any kids."
I'm surprised to find myself working at NASA even though i never graduated high school.
Someone had to clean the toilets and keep the place clean.
When I was at school I had it tough. Other kids would throw lumps of gold at me.
I was a victim of bullion.
Don't know if this was posted here before
My maths book from high school... I’m sorry
I still don't understand why I got in trouble in high school for turning in my Biology lab notebook with a turd in it.
The teacher told us specifically to keep a log in our notebook!
What's the similarity between a person with rheumatism and a high school drug dealer
They both have bad joints
Just wondering, do you think it's alright for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are in school..
..or am I just a terrible Teacher ?
My daughter claims her school is huanted and wanted to call the ghost busters.
I told her to call the cheerleading squad instead. Figured they might know the school spirit.
Why aren't high school twins afraid of getting mono?
Because they get stereo instead!
Why Do Magicians Make Good High School Teachers?
They already know all of the trick questions.
My wife asked me whether I experimented with sex and drugs when I was in high school, and I said Yes.
Unfortunately I was part of the control group.
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