Do your worst!

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

I have posted this DD previously this weekend, but now with the two new heads, Rohit Chopra(CFPB), and Gary Gensler (SEC), I figure that this information may be more relevant. All the new Information will be at the end separated by '----'. I am typing this on desktop, no emojis here yet (insert rocket diamond hands ape frog ice-cream emojis here)

The following post contains fact and speculation, and should not be taken as serious truths. Tin foil hats are required. Be prepared to have your brains smoothed out by my chewed up crayons.

*Side note: I am leaving Plotkin out of this because we already know his butt is stuffed by Kenny G. This also goes for Vlad the rat.

TL;DR:

1. Citadel has connections everywhere
2. The SEC may be too afraid to mess with their own kind
3. We should investigate who may try to stop the squeeze legally
4. The two new heads have an eye out for protecting retail, BULLISH AF

WHY IS THIS IMPORTANT?

A lot of you are all anticipating the MOASS. Many are getting impatient and FUD is crazy strong rn. I am holding and buying until we we reach the minimum 100k floor no matter how long it takes.

HOWEVER, there is still justice to be had in this. A lot of us are also wondering why and how is this even possible? If we look at exactly WHO is involved, we may be able to start seeing connections and patterns that may require more investigation.

If we want to fight, flip off the SEC and the Hedgies, Its good to know WHO and WHY we are flipping them off. If they become under more scrutiny from the world. there is a higher chance that they won't be able to pull off whatever fuckery they do in order to stop the rocket from launching.

WE WANT THE ROCKET TO LAUNCH WITH NO LEGAL INTERUPTIONS!

WHO ARE THE PLAYERS?

1. Citadel - Big Boi Money Maker/Investment Firm/Execution Service Provider led by Kenneth Griffin himself. Based out of Chicago Illinois, has firms around the world.
2. Point72 - big boy Investment Firm Led by Steven Cohen. Chipped in with Citadel to bail Melvin Capital out ( Also gets paid by Citadel for order flow)
3. DTCC - They are the sole “plumbers” of the stock exchange system. I suggest looking into their responsibilities as they are an integral part of the trading system. Lead by Michael Bodson
4. SEC - Well we already know this group of clowns. Temporarily being headed by Allison Herren Lee, the only wild card I can’t quite figure out yet.
5. CIA - This one is a tiny stretch just for funsie

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

When I got home, they were still there.

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Bob

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

I was just sitting there doing nothing.

“BOOM”?!

"That's what they're fighting about."

Because his Visa didn’t work.

free

Because the audience only responds in a low ha