Adelaide Casino Puns

SA Health has identified new COVID-19 exposure locations in South Australia associated with a positive case of COVID-19.

If you attended an exposure location, you are required to follow the relevant health advice.

CLOSE CONTACT EXPOSURE LOCATIONS

Adelaide - Eos by SkyCity (patrons at check in area)

• Thursday 25 November – 2.00pm to 2.15pm

Adelaide - iTL Italian Kitchen (indoor patrons)

• Thursday 25 November – 6.00pm to 7.00pm

Plympton - Highway Hotel (Lounge Bar patrons)

• Thursday 25 November – 12.30pm to 1.20pm

Walkerville - Sussex Hotel (indoor patrons)

• Thursday 25 November – 7.35pm to 8.20pm

Unvaccinated contacts – If you are unvaccinated and were at the above Close contact exposure location at the specified date and time, you must:

• immediately quarantine for 14 days since you were at the location
• get tested immediately
• get tested again on day 6 and day 13

Vaccinated contacts - If you are vaccinated and were at the above Close contact exposure location at the specified date and time, you must:

• immediately quarantine for 7 days since you were at the location
• get tested immediately
• get tested again on day 6 and day 13
• not attend high risk settings or COVID Management Plan events for 14 days after exposure
• wear a surgical mask when around others
• avoid contact with vulnerable people, avoid non-essential activities where possible and avoid shared spaces and maintain physical distancing on days 8 to 14 after exposure.

CASUAL CONTACT EXPOSURE LOCATION

Adelaide - Eos by SkyCity (patrons at swimming pool)

• Thursday 25 November – 4.20pm to 5.15pm

If you were at one of the above Casual contact exposure locations at the specified dates and times, you must:

• get tested immediately and quarantine until you receive a negative result
• get tested again on day 6 and day 13
• wear a surgical mask when around others at all times
• avoid contact with vulnerable people (elderly, pregnant, young children), avoid non-essential activities where possible, avoid shared spaces and maintain physical distancing.

LOW RISK CASUAL CONTACT LOCATIONS

Adelaide – SkyCity Adelaide Casino

• Thursday 25 November – 7.00pm to 7.15pm

Adelaide Airport – Adelaide Airport

• Thursday 25 November – 11.10am to 11.45pm

Adelaide Airport – Harbour Town Adelaide (Polo Ralph Lauren, Tommy Hilfiger, Sports Power)

• Thursday 25 November – 11.35am to 12.35pm

Kingston SE – Sip'n Save – Royal Mail Hotel

• Wedn

Just heard unconfirmed news that Adelaide casino will be closed from midday tomorrow for up to 6 months.

Adelaide casino employs over 1100 staff members. Most being casual employees.

G’day Adelaide.

I have a trip booked to Adelaide in April. My grandparents used to go to Adelaide every year, before my grandfather passed, and would go buy this specific set of playing cards for my mum each time from the casino. Our family regularly plays a version of Gin Rummy and mum will forever swear by this deck of cards, as they are large and have a different colour for each suit. I don’t know why, but it’s the only kind of deck she’ll play with. While you could probably get a similar deck over the net, I have a feeling the Adelaide Casino ones are particularly nostalgic for her.

Now, the last time these cards found their way back to my mum was around the time my grandfather passed in 2008.

Things change over the time, so I must ask, is there still a gift shop at the Adelaide Casino? I know the cards may not still be sold, but is there still a gift shop at the Adelaide Casino that sells these souvenir-esque things so I can suss it out for her?

Thank you!

Hey Adelaidians,

So here's the thing. Wherever my girlfriend travels in the world she brings home a $5 chip from that country's casino. She's got something like twenty-three $5 casino chips from around Australia, New Zealand, USA and Asia and she loves them.

Anyway last year we flew to Adelaide to watch Adelaide United stomp Western Sydney Wanderers into the dirt (fuck WSW). While we were there we went to the casino, played a few hands, and my girl got her long-awaited $5 Adelaide Casino chip (all she needs is Perth to complete all of Australia).

Anyway a fucking freight company (fuck TNT) lost a box of hers last week and that chip was in it. She's devastated because we live in Queensland and might never get back to Adelaide (and certainly not just to get a $5 chip). The casino won't send me one either. They think I'm fucking nuts for asking.

Can anyone get her a red $5 Adelaide casino chip and mail it to me so I can surprise her? I'll pay for the chip plus postage plus $20 for your troubles. The thing is I can place it in her jewellery box that she hasn't thought to look in yet and she'll think it's the original.

I know it sounds really weird but these casino chips are her thing. They mean a lot to her.

EDIT: I'm prepared to pay for it through eBay, PayPal, direct transfer. Whatever works for you.

EDIT: THANKS ADELAIDE! I've been offered heaps of help and I've got a chip confirmed to be sent. The response here is amazing. You guys are cool people.

Hi all, I've got a job interview at the Adelaide Casino on Monday. Just wondering if anyone here works at the casino or has worked there in the past and can give me some pointers?

The position I'm after is a beverage/food attendant and it's a group interview. I've asked a friend who has sat (but failed) a group interview there before and he told me the process went something like: introductions, hypothetical scenarios and 2 tests consisting of beverage/food knowledge and a basic maths test.

I've already begun revising some basic information regarding food and beverage but can anyone give me some tips as to how I can be successful in this group interview? Group interviews strike me as a lot harder, as I'd think you'd need to be amazing and stand out from the group.

Also, is anyone here working or has worked at the Casino? If so, how did you find it? Just curious for some experiences

Thanks in advance :-)

I have heard that if you give a monkey a banana for every sixth time he throws a rock, he quickly learns the schedule; acquiring bananas until satisfied and then going about his day. If you give the same monkey a dice, and a banana every time he lands a six, monkey will roll until his fingers bleed and until a fruity-rotten, maggot-orgy piles up around him.

I sit collecting fruit with the other monkeys, throwing rocks into our dice machines.

I’m surrounded by lights, carpet, electronic noises and high-tech surveillance. How do they afford all this? A party member comes and silently takes my glass away, I display extreme gratitude – perhaps if I coddle up to this wanker my dice machine will start cooperating?

The other monkeys are doing well. Around me machines explode in cascades of victory and fruit-rocks. I need to stay game. I can feel my contraption swelling and bulging, just a few more rocks and it will eject its glorious contents.

It happens 4-minutes before my train leaves meaning I have to make an uncomfortable brisk walk out, around and down. You must never run from a casino.

My payout is something of an anti-climax but enough for me to appreciate that it’s a positive-sum game.

Rating: 4.5/5

Verdict: Solvable learning task.

Interesting marketing idea?

http://i.imgur.com/vpeyj.jpg

ಠ_ಠ

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.