A Silent Voice Puns

He did unspeakable things.

Thank you for the awards. You made my day 😃

Because a real G never snitches on his homies.

It goes without saying...

It was a locomotive.

I never could stand up to pier pressure.

...I will not be deterred!!

Optimus Mime.

“No thanks, I’m stuffed!"

Me: Can we change the subject?

My wife: Okay. More chores around the house need to be done by you.

It was horrific. They did unspeakable things.

That’s not a good sign.

I would have a daughter

She said how do you know he was headed to work?

...sails are going through the roof.

A taxi

Because you can’t ‘C’ in the dark

It gets mugged everyday.

Who buys gummy worms hoping they’d taste as close to real worms as possible?

Big deal. I have had a Canon printer for years.

That's when I realised I was playing the Bee side.

They are lying.

An Incommunicado

Eh?!

Together with some friends from abroad, an Afghan, an Albanian, and Algerian, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguan, an Argintine, an Armenian, and Austrailian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Taiwanese, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turkish, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian

Have you been wearing glasses during the pandemic?!? Have you been wearing your mask?!? You may be entitled to condensation.

"Sorry about her. Her specialty is also roofing."

Blank stares. My talents are so wasted without kids.

Nothing fancy, but was something I could always see myself doing.

I told him I don’t knead the dough, but I do get a rise out of it

Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now

but graphing is where I draw the line

Now it just says, "It's around here somewhere. Keep driving for a little while. "

In fact, all the trouble started because it was ajar.

Grandma: You need a new battery for your hearing aid.

Each has a cigarette, but nothing to light it with.

So one man throws his cigarette into the water, and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.

A whim away, a whim away, a whim away

Because adding just one more would make it too farty. Straight from my 7 year old daughter.

Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes. I showed my daughter how many people saw and appreciated her humor and she's extatic. I know she probably didn't come up with the joke herself but this was one of the first times she really got me with a good one and I thought I'd share it with some fellow dads and others.

and the magician disappeared, with out a trace.

“No thanks, I’m stuffed!"