Came out backwords / at a loss for words / just one big bowl of soup / proper punctuation: the colon / man,ure on a roll / just stirring the pot / poo-lease stop / can't. IOU potty humor / Y you say that? / It's fun, butt OK - mind my P's and Q's - I'll put lid on it
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πŸ‘€︎ u/barwhack
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2017
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Just got laid off at work (NOT A JOKE)

Please give me the best dad jokes you got

Edit (10/8): WOW. I did not expect to get this many upvotes or awards, let alone this many dad jokes this early. Thank you all for helping me laugh/groan this entire coming weekend. Keep em coming!

Edit 2: 10K???!! I’m at a loss for words guys. Thank you so much for the love and making me laugh and groan my ass off for the next 3 months straight. Let’s make it 4! β™₯️

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bassistheplace246
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2021
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I am trying to think how to explain a thesaurus

But I am at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2021
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The old librarian cried as her library burned to the ground.

Onlookers could tell she was at loss for words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caverypca
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2021
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My ex-wife took my dictionary and my thesaurus.

She left me at a total loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/curisaucety
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2021
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I can’t believe somebody stole my dictionary.

I’m at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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This story is about a man called Trevor, and his obsession with tractors.

Trevor loved tractors. And I mean, really loved tractors. Forget any obsessions or high-level interests you may have, chances are they pale in the face of Trevor’s love for tractors.

Every day Trevor would get up, in his tractor-themed bedroom in his tractor-themed house, with its tractor-themed wallpaper and tractor-themed carpets, and he would make his bed with its tractor-themed duvet and tractor-themed sheets. He would go downstairs in his tractor-themed pajamas into his tractor-themed kitchen, with its tractor-themed tiles and cupboards, and he would eat his breakfast while perusing the latest tractor-themed magazine or annual.

Trevors’s degree in Agricultural Engineering hung on his living room wall, along with a copy of his thesis, which centred around (you guessed it) tractors. The living room was decorated with all sorts of tractor-related trinkets, including die-cast models, paintings and drawings.

The hedges in Trevor’s front garden were trimmed in the shape of tractors. His lawn was vividly decorated with tractor-driving garden gnomes, and his garden furniture was constructed from various parts from vintage tractor designs.

Trevor just had one thing missing from his otherwise tractor-centric life; he had never actually owned, nor driven, a real tractor.

Not for his lack of trying, of course. Trevor had been to many tractor shows over the years, and visited many farms with friends of his, but none of the tractors he had seen had ever been quite right. Trevor was so knowledgeable about tractors that every single one he had come across had possessed some hidden trait that he wasn’t keen on. His first experience of driving a real tractor had to be perfect.

One day, Trevor was flicking through one of his favourite publications, Powertrain Quarterly, when there was a knock at the door. Trevor answered, and it was his friend and fellow tractor enthusiast, Jeff.

Trevor welcomed Jeff in, and over tea and crumpets served on tractor-themed crockery, they discussed the merits of aluminium drawbars and front-end loaders. Eventually Trevor pressed Jeff to explain the reason for his visit.

β€œWell” said Jeff, β€œAs I’m sure you know the convention comes to town later”.

The convention. Trevor had been thinking of little else the past three weeks. The neighbouring town annually threw a convention for farmers, particularly farmyard machinery. There would be combine harvesters, lawnmowers, and of course, tractors.

β€œYes of course” replied Trevor

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShredderSte
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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I didn't make this up but I wish I knew who did.

It was a gloomy day for a funeral. The widow weeped quietly in the front row. A distinguished gentleman approached her and said "Ma'am, I'm so sorry for your loss. Would you mind if I said a word?" "Please do", she replied. He stands, straightens his tie, and says "Plethora." Then he sits down. "Thank you," she said.

"That means a lot."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eap42
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
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My doctor told me I had laryngitis.

I was at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-Outcazt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
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Someone stole my thesaurus

I am at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
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A man is at a funeral.

He goes up to the widow and says, β€œI’m so sorry for your loss, may I say a word?”

The widow says, β€œYes, go ahead”

The man goes up to the stand and says, β€œPlethora”

The widow then says, β€œThank you, that means a lot”

πŸ‘︎ 277
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2018
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In a fit of rage and sorrow, I kept stuttering

I couldn't find my voice, I stuttered, " I, I-i, Iβ€”I, I'L" I was at a loss for words

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2020
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I misplaced my dictionary the other day

I am at a loss for words

πŸ‘︎ 60
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chaseo2017
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
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If you have to resign in Scrabble,

Then you’re at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HadoukenKitty
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2018
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dDadjoked my dad today

me:"I'm at a loss for words today... what's the word when someone gets stabbed or shot or something?"

dad:"Violence."

me:" Dad. Violence is never the answer."

he almost choked on the pistachio muffin he was eating.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Judoshop
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2014
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This was one of the most awkward jokes my dad made.

Dad: "Son, if I wasn't a motherfucker, you wouldn't be around."

My mom was also in the room and was at a loss for words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/foryourdingus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2014
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My friend stole my dictionary

I’m at a loss for words.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kramj007
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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