For math lovers and others to
  1. Why was the fraction apprehensive about marrying the decimal? Because he would have to convert.

  2. Why do plants hate math? It gives them square roots.

  3. Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average? It was a mean thing to say!

  4. Why was the math book depressed? It had a lot of problems.

  5. Why is the obtuse triangle always so frustrated? Because it is never right.

  6. Why can you never trust a math teacher holding graphing paper? Heย must be plotting something.

  7. Why was the equal sign so humble? Because she knew she wasnโ€™t greater than or less than anyone else.

  8. What do you call the number 7 and the number 3 when they go out on a date? The odd couple

  9. What do you call a number that canโ€™t stay in one place? A Roaminโ€™ numeral.

  10. Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably.

  11. What do you call dudes who love math? Algebros.

  12. Iโ€™ll do algebra, Iโ€™ll do trig. Iโ€™ll even do statistics. But graphing is where I draw the line!

  13. Why should you never talk to Pi? Because sheโ€™ll go on and on and on forever.

  14. Why are parallel lines so tragic if they have so much in common? Itโ€™s a shame theyโ€™ll never meet.

  15. Are monsters good at math? Not unless you Count Dracula.

  16. Whatโ€™s the best way to flirt with a math teacher? Use acute angle.

  17. Did you hear about the mathematician who is afraid of negative numbers? Theyโ€™d stop at nothing to avoid them.

  18. How do you stay warm in any room? Just huddle in the corner, where itโ€™s always 90 degrees.

  19. Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight ("ate") nine!

  20. Why DID seven eat nine? Because youโ€™re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day!

  21. Why does nobody talk to circles? Because there is no point.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/InvestWithArihant
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
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My proudest dad joke

This actually happened a couple years ago, but I've decided to finally come out if lurking to share it here.

I was on a trip with some friends and we had stopped for lunch. We weren't very busy so my buddy and I shared a plate of wings and a couple pitchers of beer. When it came to pay, the bill was $20.01 (I don't remember how much it actually was, but it was an odd number) and we just split the bill down the middle. When we got our checks, his had the extra penny. We joked about him paying so much more, and so I said I would add an extra penny to my tip, plus one more penny to one up him.

Afterwards when we were walking out my buddy turned to me and said "do you think she'll she even notice?" I said "I like to think that she will notice and maybe chuckle at it. Besides pennies can add up and make a difference, but that's just my 2 cents"

I am not a dad yet. But I definitely feel the fatherly humor running through my veins.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 25
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Kjc2022
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
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conversation with my daughter

My daughter and I had this conversation last night:

me: 67 is a prime number. I'm 67 years old. That means I'm in the prime of my life!

her: 67 is also an odd number, and you are odd.

me: all prime numbers are odd, except for two.

her: which two?

me: 2

I got her on that one! We laughed for a couple of minutes. I guess you're never too old for dad jokes. :)

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/b0b
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 11 2016
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Got my Roomie with a pizza inspired joke

So we've sat down to have our pizzas after an adventure to get them both, when he's commenting on how 'odd' his order turned out.

Couple minuets later, he's offering the rest of the pizza to me, saying he can't handle the sauce.

"Oh? You must like reposts then, if you can't handle the sauce."

He just stood there for a moment, then did the looong, slow sigh.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Poojawa
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 05 2015
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My 6th grade teacher was the king of dad jokes.

My 6th grade teacher had a reputation of being the meanest, strictest teacher on campus, but once I made it through his class, I realized he could be a jokester, too.

-In math class, he liked to tell a long, complicated story about a boy encountering a genie, eventually wishing for some odd things, just to end it with the punchline, "Gee, I'm a tree." (geometry)

-Another one of his long jokes consisted of a man being chased by a hearse. In a fit of desperation, he throws some Halls throat lozenges at it...."and the coffin went away."

-During study time, he would sometimes grab a balloon from his desk, blow it up, and proceed to slowly let air out of it, just to produce the squeaky noise.

-His favorite short joke: "Doctor, doctor, I broke my arm in three places!" "I advise you to stay out of those places."

-He was also probably the all-time leader of correcting, "Can I go to the bathroom?"

-He would also occasionally play opera music at the end of the day, not dismissing the class until we made it through an entire song without laughing.

-There were also a couple words that incited a specific reaction from him. Many of these words showed up often in history class, which is his favorite subject (probably because of all the jokes):

Anyway, it was a fun year with that teacher. I'll add more of his quirks if I think of any.

-Also,

... keep reading on reddit โžก

๐Ÿ‘︎ 11
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/crazyei8hts
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 20 2013
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