#FT: Ayr United 1-0 Arbroath

Ayr United scorers: James Maxwell (18')

Venue: Somerset Park

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LINE-UPS

Ayr United

Aidan McAdams, Sean McGinty, Jack Baird, Aaron Muirhead, Patrick Reading, Jordan Houston, Andrew Murdoch, Joe Chalmers, James Maxwell Daire O'Conchubhair, Mark McKenzie Nicholas Mcallister, Michael Moffat Fraser Bryden.

Subs: Charlie Albinson, Finn Ecrepont.

^____________________________

Arbroath

Derek Gaston, Thomas O'Brien, Ricky Little, Colin Hamilton, David Gold Nicky Low, Christopher Hamilton, Michael McKenna, James Craigen Dale Hilson, Scott Stewart Bobby Linn, Joel Jonathan Nouble, Jack Hamilton.

Subs: Calum Antell, Luke Donnelly, Gavin Swankie, Liam Henderson.

MATCH STATS | via BBC

MATCH EVENTS | via ESPN

18' Goal! Ayr United 1, Arbroath 0. James Maxwell (Ayr United) right footed shot from the right side of the box to the bottom right corner.

64' Substitution, Arbroath. Nicky Low replaces David Gold.

69' Substitution, Arbroath. Bobby Linn replaces Scott Stewart.

77' Substitution, Ayr United. Fraser Bryden replaces Michael Moffat.

80' Substitution, Ayr United. Daire O'Connor replaces James Maxwell.

83' Jack Baird (Ayr United) is shown the yellow card.

83' Substitution, Arbroath. Dale Hilson replaces James Craigen.

90'+4' Substitution, Ayr United. Nicholas McAllister replaces Mark McKenzie.

^____________________________

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#[Premiership - 2021/2022] #FT: 90' Celtic 1-1 Dundee Utd

r/celticfc match thread

Match Info:

Date: September 26, 2021

Time: 15:00 (Europe/London)

Venue: Celtic Park

Recent form

Celtic: WLWWL

Dundee Utd: WDLWWL

Lineups:

Celtic - 4-3-3

Starting XI: Joe Hart, Anthony Ralston, Cameron Carter-Vickers, Carl Starfelt, Josip Juranović, Tom Rogić, James McCarthy, David Turnbull, Liel Abada, Albian Ajeti, Jota

Substitutes: Scott Bain, Nir Bitton, Adam Montgomery, Stephen Welsh, Liam Scales, Ismaila Soro, Owen Moffat

Coach: A. Postecoglou

Dundee Utd - 4-3-3

Starting XI: Benjamin Siegrist, Kieran Freeman, Kerr Smith, Ryan Edwards, Scott McMann, Ian Harkes, Peter Pawlett, Jeando Fuchs, Dylan Levitt, Nicky Clark, Ilmari Niskanen

Substitutes: Trevor Carson, Mark Reynolds, Adrián Spörle, Logan Chalmers, Florent Hoti, Chris Mochrie, Louis Appéré

Coach: T. Courts

Match Stats:

Match events

0' KICKOFF!

15' Yellow Card for J. Fuchs (Dundee Utd)

16' GOAL! Scored by L. Abada (Celtic)

18' GOAL! Scored by I. Harkes (Dundee Utd)

26' Substitution: A. Montgomery for J. Juranović (Celtic)

46' Substitution: I. Soro for J. McCarthy (Celtic)

62' Substitution: A. Spörle for I. Niskanen (Dundee Utd)

79' Substitution: L. Appéré for P. Pawlett (Dundee Utd)

90' Yellow Card for K. Freeman (Dundee Utd)

90' Match whistled off

—

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I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

The doctor says it terminal.

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Nothing, he was gladiator.

The bartender says, "Sorry, no minors”

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

Or would that be too forward thinking?

Celtic 1-1 Dundee Utd

[Premiership - 2021/2022 - 1st Phase - 7]

r/celticfc post match thread

Match Info:

Lineups:

Celtic - 4-3-3

Starting XI: Joe Hart, Anthony Ralston, Cameron Carter-Vickers, Carl Starfelt, Josip Juranović, Tom Rogić, James McCarthy, David Turnbull, Liel Abada, Albian Ajeti, Jota

Substitutes: Scott Bain, Nir Bitton, Adam Montgomery, Stephen Welsh, Liam Scales, Ismaila Soro, Owen Moffat

Coach: A. Postecoglou

Dundee Utd - 4-3-3

Starting XI: Benjamin Siegrist, Kieran Freeman, Kerr Smith, Ryan Edwards, Scott McMann, Ian Harkes, Peter Pawlett, Jeando Fuchs, Dylan Levitt, Nicky Clark, Ilmari Niskanen

Substitutes: Trevor Carson, Mark Reynolds, Adrián Spörle, Logan Chalmers, Florent Hoti, Chris Mochrie, Louis Appéré

Coach: T. Courts

Match Stats:

Match events

0' KICKOFF!

15' Yellow Card for J. Fuchs (Dundee Utd)

16' GOAL! Scored by L. Abada (Celtic)

18' GOAL! Scored by I. Harkes (Dundee Utd)

26' Substitution: A. Montgomery for J. Juranović (Celtic)

46' Substitution: I. Soro for J. McCarthy (Celtic)

62' Substitution: A. Spörle for I. Niskanen (Dundee Utd)

79' Substitution: L. Appéré for P. Pawlett (Dundee Utd)

90' Yellow Card for K. Freeman (Dundee Utd)

90' Match whistled off

Player Match Stats

Celtic

Dundee Utd

|Player|Rating|Mins |Shots|Tack