I'll never forget when my dad told me, "Find yourself a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you!” A little taken aback, I asked him what he meant. He explained...

β€œShe knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them!"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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Texting walkie talkie lingo is confusing.

My dad texted me to remind me to turn in my rent, he thinks I'll forget something important like that I guess. I didn't respond from his initial text message so he quickly sent me another

"Please confirm. Roger over and out."

I responded saying "Thank you!" he was clearly not happy with this and said

"You're supposed to say "Roger..Over" at the end of your communication. Over"

I replied "Roger I love you. Over"

My dad responded with "My name is Dad, not Roger. What the Hell? Over" ...

I will never understand his humor.. But it makes me laugh.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LynaM
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2013
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What do men and snow storms have in common?

You never know when they're going to come or how many inches your going to get!!

Thank you thank you, I'll be here all week at the Ramada Inn North, and please don't forget to tip your server!!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bakunetsu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2016
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I'll never forget my Granddad's last words before he kicked the bucket...

I'll never forget my Granddad's last words before he kicked the bucket...

"How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yebol
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2016
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Street names

I'll never forget when I was riding shotgun while my dad drove, and we were taking my friend Joe home. We had driven these streets hundreds of times, but at this moment, my dad released all these heretofore unheard-of puns.

We took a right on Cambridge Ave.

Dad looks over and stoically says in a gravelly voice with an -- American Indian?? -- accent, "First came iron horse… then came bridge."

Groans.

As we approach Minot Ln., he asks "do I turn here?" and Joe says "yes," to which dad replies "I don't know, Joe, I might, but I minot!"

Groans.

Finally, we make our last turn onto Cheyenne. Dad says with a deliberate, measured cadence, "You know, growing up, all the girls I met were so forward. It was weird. But then I met Shy Anne."

He finished his sentence right as we pulled into Joe's driveway. He put his right hand on the back of my headrest and turned to face us with a wide smile and the glittering, eyes of a puppy that just fetched on command.

Joe said "Thanks, Mr. Smith," and he got out and ran into his house.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/doc_ids
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2014
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